Fools Rush In
by TheCaneOfBates
Summary: Modern A/U. An encounter on April Fools Day changes Anna Smith and John Bates lives forever.
1. April

**A/N- So here is my latest modern AU Fiction. It took me ages to settle on an idea. I finally chose this one after watching an episode of Frasier. (I have shamelessly stolen a couple of jokes form the show and added them in here. Sorry Paramount and Mr Grammer). **

**It's something slightly different, looking at the Anna and Bates dynamic from a different angle. It is set over the course of just under a year, each chapter a month. I am trying to make it slightly jovial as my last couple of pieces have been quite angsty. There will be angst here, but hopefully a few laughs aswell. **

**I hope you enjoy. **

**Disclaimer:** _Downton and all its wonderful characters do not belong to me. _

* * *

John Bates's head was throbbing. An all too familiar feeling for a Sunday morning. As he slowly opened his eyes, he suddenly realised he was in a room he didn't recognise. He was in a bed, that much was for sure but his current hung-over state was rendering coherent thought a little difficult. The walls were a deep purple, there was a Justin Timberlake poster on the wall. John grimaced, he didn't have one of those up in his room, that much was for sure. Turning his attention directly to his right he saw a signed picture of Olly Murs in a frame, sitting upon the bedside table. It read,

_'To Anna, never stop being a Troublemaker, love Olly Murs x._'

He turned his nose up at the terrible 'joke' before feeling a slight draft. Looking down his body, the covers pooled at his waist, he also noticed he was as naked as the day he was born. Blinking a few times, it was becoming increasingly apparent to him that he wasn't alone. Soft breaths were clearly audible, and they were definitely too effeminate to be his. Slowly turning his head to his left, wincing as he did so, the first thing he saw was flowing blonde hair, splayed out about the pillow the young lady was resting her own head upon. She must be called Anna, if her signed picture was anything to go by. Fragments of memories from the previous evening trickled into his conscious. He and Anna had got talking at the party after he had finished his set. He could remember getting into a taxi, then almost as soon as the driver had begun to drive, Anna was upon his lap, knees at his hips, his hands moving down her thighs before coming to rest on her bottom as they began to kiss.

It was hot.

Once back at Anna's, they continued what they had started, which must have lead to how he found himself now. Sitting up in bed, John rubbed his eyes as he waited for the room to stop spinning. It came as a relief that his clothes were easy for him to get hold of. Slipping on his boxers, he made putting on his trousers more difficult than it needed to be by nearly falling over. Anna remained asleep throughout his 'performance', still snoring gently as John picked up his shirt. The item absolutely stank of beer for a reason he couldn't fathom until he remembered an enthusiastic Cha Cha Slider had knocked him as he walked past with a freshly pulled pint. Slipping on his shoes then picking up his suit jacket, John gently tiptoed to the end of the bed.

Now suitably dressed to leave her house, John turned to look at Anna as she still slept soundly. She really wasn't bad to look at all, one of his better choices John thought to himself, maybe a little harshly. He might leave her his number. Looking behind him at Anna's dresser, noticing some paper and a pot filled with different coloured biros, he scribbled down his number.

_'07700 900852, Ring me if you want. John.' _

Suitably satisfied with his little note, he placed it on the table beside her before making his way out of the bedroom. As he reached the landing, John looked at all the film posters and posters of pop stars that adorned the walls. The framed picture of *NSync, complete with signatures in gold pen told him all he needed to know about her musical tastes. The Backstreet Boys poster on the opposite wall further backed up his suspicions, then the life-size cut out of Robbie Williams standing beside the top of the stairs cemented it. In between these music 'icons' she had film posters up of what seemed like every chick flick ever made. _Pretty Woman, Notting Hill, Titanic. _John considered her choices for a moment. Who was he to judge when he listed all the _Herbie _films in his top twenty?

It seemed she had been keeping eBay in business, the amount of signed merchandise on show. Maybe he wasn't giving her enough credit though, she might have got the autographs in person. She was either a compulsive shopper or a skilled stalker. As he reached the top step of the stairs, his eyes were met with a humungous framed film still of when Johnny lifts Baby in _Dirty Dancing_. Shaking his head, softly chuckling, John made his way downstairs and into the hallway that lead to the front door. His faith in humanity was almost restored when he noticed a Bon Jovi concert poster on the wall beside the front door.

The he stopped. What was he doing? Why was he scrutinising her film and music choices when there was a high possibility he would never see the woman asleep upstairs ever again, let alone set foot in her house once more. Opening the door without another glance around his surroundings, he stepped outside into the chilly spring air. The April showers were living up to their name, John deciding to use his jacket as rain cover.

Nowadays, this was how he usually spent his Sunday mornings. Leaving the bed of a woman he had met the night before. In his job as a singer, he would perform at parties, weddings, christenings. Anything that would earn him enough money to pay the rent. That rent, he owed to his best friend, Robert Crawley.

It hadn't always been this way.

Up until a couple of years previously, he been in a solid, happy marriage with his now ex wife, Vera. Having met Robert in their days in the army, John had decided he would go on one more deployment before leaving the army to pursue his hobby as a career, that of singing. He never wanted to be a pop star, just to be a wedding soloist or to perform at parties would be enough. A sergeant in the Yorkshire regiment alongside Robert, he would sing around the barracks and when on exercise, everyone telling him he should be in Take That rather than leading them into battle. Singing gave him a release, an opportunity to forget the troubles war had scarred him with.

However, on his last deployment to Afghanistan, a routine patrol ended in himself and Robert coming under heavy enemy fire. John was shot in the knee, saving Robert's life in the process. Once back home, his injury and the need to use a cane for a period of time repulsed Vera. John turned to drink to help himself through the pain of his memories, as well as that of his wife rejecting him. Robert saved him from slipping into a deep, drink dependant depression whilst Vera turned to the arms of another. As soon as John found out, he left his wife, and had been living with Robert and his wife, Cora, ever since.

As John struggled through the divorce, Robert encouraged him to follow through with his plans of being a singer, helping him set up his own business. If he had his way, John would do a set list filled with songs from the likes of U2, Nirvana and Oasis. Robert made him see that _'Smells Like Team Spirit' _wasn't a popular choice for a couple's first dance at their wedding. Recording demo's featuring more suitable songs for the events he was trying to get business for, within a few weeks John's bookings were into double figures.

Now, two years down the line from his divorce, John's weekends were filled for the next six months with weddings, anniversaries and birthday parties.

The way his marriage has disintegrated left John with a fear to commit himself to another relationship. Although now in his mid forties, John seemed to still have what it took to attract the ladies. Cora, Robert's husband, would often tell John he was a great catch. He had the dark, brooding features women seemed to love. And he could sing, and she knew that went in his favour as well. Despite all this, John hadn't had a proper relationship since he had divorced Vera, instead engaging in a series of one night stands. Sometimes he would see the women again, but John would get out before the situation became too deep.

Often after he had finished his gigs, John would stop for a pint and more often than not some woman would approach him asking for a drink. At weddings, it was usually the one who was always the bridesmaid, never the bride. He wasn't proud of it, but what was the harm? He was single and always safe. John would rather engage in an evening of something meaningless than give up his heart, only for it to be broken once more. He couldn't go through the pain again. And as far as he was concerned, he never would.

Now on the street, John set about trying to figure out exactly where he was and how to get home. It was going to be a long morning.

* * *

Stirring slightly, Anna opened her eyes before instantly closing them again, the sunlight bathing her room seemingly too bright for her to comprehend right now. As she adjusted to her newly awakened state, in a moment of sheer panic she suddenly remembered what had happened last night. Sitting bolt upright, her heart was racing as she looked at the empty space beside her. For a moment she tried to believe she had imagined leaving the party with that man last night, but the creases on the sheet beside her betrayed those thoughts. Shaking her head, she moved around to place her feet on the floor. Turning to reach for her watch to assess the time, she noticed a piece of paper covered in bright blue writing in a style she didn't recognise. Moving her watch to her other hand, she took the paper in her hand, reading the words before her. John. That was his name. The singer. She suddenly felt shame spread throughout her that she hadn't even been able to remember the name of the man who shared her bed last night until she saw it written.

What would her mother think?

Immediately wanting to banish thoughts of her mother from her mind, especially at a moment like this, she dropped the paper on the dresser, put on her dressing gown before making her way to the bathroom. As her hand came into contact with the metal of the door handle, she heard the doorbell ringing. Looking down at her other hand, she realised she hadn't actually read the time yet. Bringing the time piece closer to her, she squinted as the clock face went from blurry to become clear enough to read. Half past one.

'Bollocks!' Anna exclaimed, turning on her heel and running down the stairs towards the front door. She knew exactly who would standing on the other side. And she wouldn't be happy. Opening the door, she was met with the familiar figure of her best friend. She had her hands on her hips and was tapping her foot impatiently. Her forehead was contorted into a frown, her eyes were boring into Anna.

'Mary, I...'

'Midday we said.' Mary interrupted, walking into the house beyond Anna and into the kitchen. 'You aren't even dressed yet and we've lost our booking at the restaurant now.'

'Sorry,' Anna sighed, shutting the front door and following the path Mary had just taken. 'I had a pretty eventful evening.'

Mary already had the kettle boiling, pulling two cups down from the cupboard. 'Oh yes, your colleagues party. Gwen is it? How did it go?'

'Okay, I think,' Anna was wincing as she took a seat at the kitchen table. 'Gwen seemed to have a good time.'

'And did you pull?' Mary's tone was lighter now as she turned to take in Anna, slumped over the table.

'God Mary,' Anna's voice was muffled as she remained face down on the table. 'I did something last night I promised myself I never would.'

'Oh Anna, don't tell me you sang _Like A Virgin _on the karaoke.' Mary whined, her voice tinged with disappointment. 'Just for our girly nights in, that's what I told you. It wouldn't be fair to inflict that on the world...'

'No, something worse than that.'

'Worse than your tuneless version of the Madonna classic?' Mary's interest was piqued as she sat beside Anna at the table. 'Spill.'

Sitting up, Anna was clearly annoyed her friend was taking pleasure in her discomfort.

'Come on Anna, we all know a problem shared is a problem... well... its gossip. But who can you share gossip with if not your best friend?'

Letting out another deep sigh, Anna rested her head in her hands as the admission fell from her lips. 'I spent the night with a man I only met last night. The singer, at the party.'

'Is that it?' Mary replied, clearly disappointed as she rose to her feet and made her way back towards the kettle.

'What do you mean is that it? I have never slept with a man I barely knew in my life.'

'Then, you haven't lived my darling. Everyone's had a one nighter, you aren't the first and you certainly won't be the last,' Mary explained as she added milk to the steaming hot water she had poured into the mugs before her. 'That's if it was a one nighter.'

'Well, he did leave me his number on the bedside cabinet.' Anna said, watching as Mary placed a mug down in front of her.

'Are you going to call?'

'I doubt it. It can't have been that special, I didn't even remember his name until I read it on his note. Isn't that terrible?'

'Oh, please. I've spent the night with some men and haven't even been able to recall where I met them, let alone their names.' Anna's look of disconcertion lead Mary on to quickly change the subject. 'So, he was the singer eh?'

'Yeah, John was his name. I don't know what came over me. All I know is I am never doing that again. I feel so guilty. Dirty...'

'Alright, alright, stop right there,' Mary raised a hand to stop her friend in her tracks. 'Was he prepared?'

'Erm...' Anna rubbed her brow as she tried to remember such an intricate detail. 'Yes, he had something.'

'And did you enjoy yourself?'

Anna sat back in her chair as the memory of John's hands all over her body made her suddenly feel warm. He certainly knew what he was doing, that much was for sure.

'I'd be lying if I said I didn't.'

'Well then, just chalk it off as a moment of madness. It was April Fools Day yesterday after all. No harm done. Just take it for what it is. You are a big girl, you both obviously got what you wanted from it, God knows you must have been gagging for it...'

'Thank you, Mary,' Anna took a sip of her tea before her friend continued with what she was saying.

'How long had it been? I remember the Christmas tree was still up...'

'Yes, okay, You made your point.' Anna met Mary's amused expression then, herself beginning to chuckle gently. 'Can we still go out for something to eat? I'm famished.'

Mary nodded. 'Maybe we could add in a little retail therapy, to ease your conscience of the guilt a one night stand brings.'

Anna stood up and walked over to Mary, wrapping her arms around her shoulders before giving her a peck on the cheek. 'You're the best. Give me twenty minutes.'

'Well, I've already given you an hour and a half, what harm will twenty more minutes do?'

* * *

_-3 weeks later-_

Walking back into the office, Anna was clutching her stomach as she sat down behind her desk. Gwen looked over at her concerned as Anna composed herself, shaking her mouse to get rid of her Boyzone screensaver, before her Justin Timberlake desktop wallpaper came back into view. Looking over her monitor, her eyes were met with the concerned gaze of Gwen.

'Are you alright now?'

Anna looked down at her keyboard. She had to get payroll submitted in the next hour or no one in her department would receive their wages. Her job was boring as hell, yet it paid incredibly well. She and Gwen worked for a large law firm. It was their job to ensure any correspondence was distributed to the right people and on time, and to converse with clients as well as other tedious tasks that made Anna often wonder if her life was worth living. There were some perks, on occasions one of the senior partners, Tom Branson would come back from his lunch break often sweaty and dishevelled after rather a strenuous session at the gym. And sometimes she would be required to visit the New York office, which more often than not would turn into a 5 day shopping spree.

'Yes, something I ate at lunch I think.'

'I would believe that, if you hadn't been sick every day for the past week.' Gwen stood up, carrying a pile of folders to a cabinet situated behind her desk. 'You should go to the doctors.'

'I know I should. I probably will, if I am sick again.'

In the next moment, Anna was rising to her feet and making her way to the bathroom.

'I'll call for you,' Gwen shouted after Anna. 'Doctor Clarkson isn't it?'

* * *

Tapping her foot nervously as the Doctor looked intently at his computer screen, Anna waited to hear his diagnosis. She had listed her symptoms in great detail. Nausea was the main reason for her distress, although at times she couldn't stop eating. She was tired all the time, yet she got more than eight hours sleep a night. Doctor Clarkson listened intently, tapping away at his computer. He was taking a while to say anything, Anna couldn't really be ill, could she?

'Okay Anna. You don't mind if I call you Anna do you?'

'Well it is my name...'

'May I ask, are your nipples tender?'

Laughing out loud, Anna relied on her usual mechanism when feeling nervous, humour. 'Why, Doctor Clarkson, shouldn't we share a date first before you ask such a question?' As the doctors face remained deadpan, Anna realised she should give him a serious answer. 'I guess.'

'And, when was your last cycle?'

'Well, I haven't been out on my bike for a while, I don't seem to get on with the lycra...'

'Your last period, I mean.' Doctor Clarkson interrupted, causing Anna to jump a little. 'When was your last time of the month?'

Anna considered for a moment. She was a week late, but hadn't worried about it too much.

'Five weeks ago.' Anna replied with a shrug. 'They can be late sometimes though, can't they?'

'Yes Anna, especially when a woman is pregnant.'

'Pregnant?' Anna exclaimed, her heart beating as thought it might beat out of her chest. 'But I haven't had...'

Suddenly Anna thought of the night she had shared with that singer. John if she recalled correctly.

'Have you had relations in the past month?' Doctor Clarkson asked as he stood up and walked to a stack of cabinets behind his desk.

'Well, yes but I'm not proud of it. I was lonely, he was charming and things got out of control. We got into the taxi, I don't know what came over me. He had enormous...'

'Please, spare me the details Miss Smith.' Doctor Clarkson removed a white box from one of the cabinets and walked back to his desk before sitting down. 'All I need to know is has it been within the last month.'

'Well yes, it was April Fools Day.'

'I bet it was,' Doctor Clarkson replied, raising his eyebrows.

'But he used protection...'

'Sometimes protection lets you down.' He smiled as Anna took the box in her hands. 'Go to the bathroom and take this test. It might be negative, but we should check, just to make sure.'

* * *

'Pregnant?' Mary was pacing the living room as Anna sat on the sofa, watching as her friend took in the news that had just been revealed to her. 'It must be that John's. You haven't slept with anyone else since the French Revolution, have you?'

'Yes, thank you Mary,' Anna snapped. 'What am I going to do?'

'I suppose the most important question is, are you going to keep it?'

Mary moved to sit beside her friend now as Anna thought about her question. She had just had her thirty second birthday, a woman's body clock was different to that of a mans. And she always came over broody when Gwen's sister would bring her baby into the office. She lived in her big old house on her own, maybe something like this was what she needed. Something to live for finally.

'Yes, I think so,' Anna replied, her voice barely a whisper. 'I have always liked the idea of becoming a mother.'

'But the reality is so much different. Your body will change. Stretch marks, everything moving south. And that's even before the sleepless nights and nappy changes. It won't be pretty.'

'Well, it's lucky I have such a supportive friend to help me through it then, isn't it?' Anna smiled, tapping Mary on the hand. 'Getting rid of it is out of the question. I am a big girl, I can do this.'

'What about the father?'

'What?'

'You need to tell him. You have his number don't you?'

'Do I though?' Anna asked, closing her eyes and pinching the bridge of her nose. 'He obviously has no interest in me.'

'Anna, it's his right to know. If he wants nothing to do with it then he's an arsehole but as you say, I'll be here. And your parents.'

'Oh God, I forgot about them.'

'Well, you need to call this John first.'

'I know,' Anna sighed, staring at the ceiling. 'I know.' She turned to see Mary's expectant face.

'Well, no time like the present is there?'

'I'm not calling him now,' Anna dismissed her friends advice. 'Besides, he's probably out somewhere singing the greatest hits of Rick Astley.'

'Just try, and if he answers invite him over tonight. I can meet him then.'

Anna stood up and made her way to her bedroom. Walking to her dresser, she moved a few perfume bottles around before finding what she was looking for. Why she hadn't thrown the number away, she didn't know. Anna would never have called if it wasn't for the circumstance she found herself in now. Sitting on the edge of the bed, mobile phone clutched in one hand, his number the other, she couldn't recall the last time she had felt so nervous. The man she was calling could have been a perfect stranger, she wasn't even sure what he looked like. Only that he had dark hair. And that the sleeve of his shirt was wet. And he kissed her like no other man ever had in her life. Beginning to type in his number, her finger hovered over the call button. Inhaling deeply, she pressed it. It rang for a couple of moments before he answered.

'John Bates.' Anna was struck dumb, she had no idea how to continue the conversation. What she had to say would turn this unassuming man's world upside down. She struggled to comprehend how she would convey her message in words. 'Hello? Who is this?'

'Erm... sorry.' Anna squeezed her eyes shut. 'It's Anna. Anna Smith.'

'Anna Smith? I don't know an Anna...' He stopped dead, Anna could tell he was slowly remembering who she was. 'Did I meet you at a party?'

'Yes, you did.'

'I left you my number, in the bright blue pen.'

'Yes.'

'Anna, you know I didn't...'

'Look, don't worry. I'm not ringing to confess my undying love.' Anna interrupted, her voice slightly more harsh than she would have wished. 'I need to see you.'

'Oh God, I won't have to be tested a multitude of infections will I?'

'No, of course not,' Anna shouted, thoroughly insulted. 'How dare you.'

'I'm sorry, that was a stupid thing to say. I'm not an arsehole, honestly.'

'Hmmm...' Anna wasn't so sure but decided to carry on regardless. 'Are you able to come round to my house this evening?'

'Can you not just tell me over the phone? The football is on...'

'Blimey, men and their bloody football.'

'Women and their need to want everything right now.' John replied without missing a beat.

Anna allowed herself to smile, they were arguing like a proper couple and they had only spent a matter of a few hazy hours together previously. 'Please. It's important.'

She heard John sigh deeply but could sense he was relenting. 'Oh alright. I can be with you in twenty minutes.'

'Thank you, John. I really appreciate it.'

John hung up then, Anna storing his number in her phone. She believed she was going to need it in the future.

* * *

Pulling up in his car outside Anna's house, John switched off the ignition to his black Range Rover. He didn't need a car so big, but it was all he was left with after the divorce so he was damned if he was going to downsize. Jumping out of the car, he took in the house that stood before him. Anna must do well for herself to be able to afford such a nice house. He remembered all the memorabilia that decorated her walls and laughed to himself. Then it dawned on him that he should probably be more concerned with what had caused him to be here tonight. Maybe he had left something behind. Treading the path, he rang the doorbell. Anna appeared within what seemed like seconds, seemingly nervous as she struggled to spread her lips into a smile.

'Hello John.'

'Anna.'

Anna was surprised to find him wearing glasses. Why, she didn't know. It was a perfectly normal item of clothing for a man to wear. They seemed to make him more distinguished than she could remember. Would their baby need glasses? Would her child be bullied? Kids could be ruthless. Inwardly curing herself, she tried to banish those thoughts from her mind. She was really getting ahead of herself.

'Everything alright?' He asked with a smirk, raising his eyebrows slightly.

'Yes, of course. It's just you are taller than I remember.'

'Oh, well I guess last time we were together, well, for the majority I was lying down.'

'Yes, that must be it.' Anna agreed with a nod, seemingly ignoring the joviality in his tone and taking what he was saying seriously. 'Come through.'

Stepping aside to allow John inside, he stood by the foot of the stairs, taking in the Bon Jovi poster once more.

'He's good, isn't he?' John remarked, pointing at the rock star.

'Jon Bon? He's not bad. Shall we go through to the kitchen?'

Anna lead the way, John following behind taking off his jacket as he walked. Once in the kitchen, he rested his jacket on the back of one of the dining chairs. Anna intended to introduce John to Mary before, upon seeing him, Mary dropped the teaspoon she was holding.

'Bloody hell.' Mary muttered under her breath.

'Mary, what are you doing here?'

'Oh, so you two know each other?' Anna asked, suddenly finding herself very confused, her eyes on Mary as she leant down to pick up the spoon she had dropped in her shock.

'I'll say, I live with her parents.' John replied, his face shining. 'How are you, pipsqueak?' He looked at Anna, holding his hand about a metre from the floor. 'I've known her since she was this big. I am Godfather to her little sisters, Edith and Mary.'

'Why didn't you tell me you knew him?' Anna hissed at Mary.

'I didn't know you meant this John. There are a lot of John's in the world, Anna,' Mary replied flustered, turning her attentions back to making the tea.

'Didn't you guess when I said he was a singer?'

'There are a lot of John's who are singers, Anna.' Mary's voice was panicked as she reached for the canister that held the sugar. 'John Lennon. John Denver...'

'But neither of them would hardly be gigging as Yorkshire's Premier Wedding and Party singer, would they?'

'And why not?' Mary argued back.

'Well for one, they're both dead!' Anna exclaimed before looking back at John who was finding everything entirely amusing.

'Besides, I never thought for a million years it would be this John. He's old for a start...'

'Hey!' John took offence to Mary's words before putting his hands in his pockets. . 'Do you mind if we skip the pleasantries and get onto the reason why I am actually here.'

'Yes, I think that would be best,' Mary agreed, carrying two mugs to the table and setting them down. John sat at one end of the table, Anna the other. Mary placed herself in the middle. 'Anna, you start.'

'You're staying?' Anna asked, looking at her friend.

'Of course,' Mary answered, placing a hand on top of Anna's. 'I am your support, your guidance.'

'You're nosey more like...'

'Okay, what's going on here?' John opened his hands. He flailed a lot, Anna had noticed. It was annoying. Would her child share that trait? 'What have I done?'

'Quite a lot, actually.' Mary said slyly before taking a sip of her tea.

'I'm scared now,' John admitted, shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

'Look, there is no easy way to say this.' Anna began, looking from John to Mary who was watching the two of them like this was the afternoon matinee at the Odeon. Anna rolled her eyes before averting her gaze to John. He looked terrified. Anna needed to alleviate his fears. 'I need you to know, although I am still a little shocked, I am perfectly happy with what has happened.'

'For heaven's sake,' John breathed, placing his elbows on the table, clasping his hands together and leaning forwards. 'What is it with woman and their cryptic messages. Just tell me.'

'Very well. I'm pregnant,' Anna said, her eyes locked on his as her words lingered in the air. 'And it's yours.'

Silence.

Both Mary and Anna were staring intently at John as he stared blankly back at Anna, as if he was looking straight through her. Still more silence. Anna could take no more.

'Please say something,' Anna said, breaking the stillness in the room.

'But I wore...' John scrunched up his nose before continuing, '...a thingy.'

'Sometimes thingies fail, the doctor told me,' Anna informed him before taking a sip of her tea. 'And yours failed. It must have split.'

'But they never have before...'

'Shall we call Durex and ask them for your money back?' Anna snapped impatiently. 'Have you read the box? They advise they are only effective ninety nine out of a hundred times.'

'Well given John's history with women recently, he was under pressure to beat those odds.'

'Mary, you aren't helping.' Anna turned her frustrations onto her friend.

'How are you so sure it's mine?' John asked.

'Honestly, John,' Mary began, resting a hand upon his wrist. 'It's yours. Anna hadn't been with anyone else since before Christmas.'

'So that would be why she jumped me in the taxi...'

'Yes, thank you,' Anna interrupted. She looked at John once more. 'I know this a lot to take in. God knows, I've known since this afternoon and still don't believe it. I just want you to know I am absolutely fine with this, John. I don't want anything from you. I am willing to do this on my own. I have wonderful parents,' Anna's tone turned slightly sceptical as she looked at Mary. 'And wonderful friends, I possess the money and means to raise the baby on my own. I just wanted you to know that you were going to be a father.'

'After I had convinced you to tell him.' Mary chipped in and in turn received a glare from Anna.

'You weren't going to tell me?' John murmured.

'Only because neither of us had any intention to see each other again. But Mary made me see sense. It's only fair. If you walk out of here tonight and want nothing to do with the baby, then I'll accept that. It's fine.'

John cleared his throat as he sat back in his chair again. 'Look, Anna. I believe the baby is mine, I won't be asking for an DNA tests or to go on Jeremy Kyle.'

'Thank God, that man is a cretin,' Mary commented before bringing her cup to her lips.

'Mary, be quiet for once in your life,' Anna squealed.

'She has a point, Mary,' John agreed, eliciting a chuckle from Anna and a moan from Mary. 'I just need time to get my head around this.'

'I completely understand.'

'Give me a few days, maybe we could meet up and I'll let you know what I decide?'

'I think that's fair,' Anna smiled, standing up as John did the same. 'I'll text you my number later on.'

'Alright, I best be getting on.' John reciprocated Anna's smile, took hold of his jacket before looking down at Mary. 'See you around, Mary.'

'Not if I see you first,' Mary replied, not even affording him a glance.

Walking out into the hallway, John turned to Anna once he reached the door. They stared at each other for a moment, neither sure what to say.

'You know I...'

'John, it's..'

Both laughed as they both tried to break the silence at the same time. Anna gestured for John to speak first.

'Are you sure you are okay? This obviously wasn't in your plans and I can't help but feel bad...'

'John, please. I am fine with this. It's not ideal, but I have always wanted a baby. In my imaginings I'd have been in love with the father, possibly married to him but it is welcome all the same. I am happy.'

'Good,' John's sigh of relief was audible.

John leant in then, taking Anna by surprise as he placed a soft kiss on her cheek. When he pulled away, Anna was taken aback by how beautiful his eyes were, how they crinkled at the edges when he smiled. He really was a very handsome man. He opened the door then, turning away from Anna until he was standing on the doorstep. He looked back over his shoulder, nodding his head slightly.

'Goodnight Anna. I'll be in touch, I promise.'

'Thank you. Good night John.'

She watched as he made his way down the path, unlocking his Range Rover as he went. As he got into the car, Anna considered how much she had changed the life of the man now sitting behind the wheel. He had been told, at his time of life, that he was to be a father. How must that make him feel? John took the news surprisingly well after he had got over the initial shock. His manner had left Anna feeling like he might want some involvement with the baby. The thought of that didn't worry her at all. John seemed like he had his head screwed on.

Shutting the door, Anna placed a hand on her stomach. She could hardly believe a new life was growing inside of her. It made her feel incredibly excited. And blessed. She suddenly felt very tired, and realised she should get used to that feeling, for the next eighteen years of her life if she thought that far ahead. Not that she believed for a moment she would get a wink of sleep, it was time to turf Mary out and head up to bed.

It had been a crazy day.

* * *

_Nothing makes my day quite like a review. If you have the time, please let me know your thoughts. Thank you :-)_


	2. May

**A/N- Firstly, thank you for the amazing response to the 'April' chapter. The thought that lots of you take a couple of minutes out of your day to review my story is really something to me. And added to that, that so many of you enjoy my work is wonderful. You guys are the best. **

**Secondly, I really need to read my stuff thoroughly before publishing. John is just Sybil's Godfather, it was a little confusing in the first chapter, mainly because I was in such a hurry to upload and didn't check what I had written properly. Also, in the context of this story, Robert and Cora are 5 or 6 years older than John. I think this might be the case in the actual show as well although there are only a matter of weeks between Brendan Coyle and Hugh Bonneville in real life. (Stalkerish? Possibly...)**

**In this chapter, John and Anna get to know eachother better. Despite the fact they already know eachother quite well. **

**Disclaimer:** Nothing belongs to me, everything is the possession of ITV/ Carnival/ Julian Fellowes...

* * *

An awkward visit to Anna's parents followed telling John the news. Although not thrilled, they vowed to stand by their daughter. Anna didn't expect anything less from her parents. She and her younger brother, Darren, had the best possible upbringing they could have been given. Leaving her parents house relieved and with the usual fruit filled Tupperware box her mother insisted she take home each time she visited, Anna could look to the future. She was going to be a Mum.

However, Anna was beginning to fear her child would grow up not knowing it's Dad. As days turned into a week she still hadn't heard from John. Feeling like she didn't really have any right to be upset, she had left it entirely in his hands, Mary had other ideas. Storming into her parents house, she bypassed the open arms of her mother and marched straight into the kitchen.

John was standing by the microwave, intently reading the cooking instructions on a salmon tagliatelle. He had bright blue floral print shorts on, akin to swimming shorts, and blue Crocs which Mary instantly turned her nose up at. She then looked away in horror as John preceded to pick his nose whilst he set the timer on the microwave. Honestly, Anna wanted this man to be involved in the upbringing of her child? The burp from John that followed this thought was the limit for Mary.

'Oh please, get some manners,' she moaned, John instantly turning around.

Mary was standing in the kitchen doorway, arms folded as Cora approached behind her. John had an obsession for collecting slogan wearing t- shirts, one of which he was sporting this evening. Mary didn't see the funny side as she read the words, 'I feel violated, do it again' across John's chest.

'Mary,' John said, leaning against the kitchen counter. 'How's work?'

'That's not why I am here and you know it,' Mary replied indignantly as Cora shuffled her way into the kitchen.

'Hello Mary darling, your mother here. Or did you fail to notice me standing open armed in the hallway?'

'Anna is still waiting for you to call.' Mary continued, moving closer to John and still completely ignoring her mother. 'You need to tell her, one way or another.'

'John, your Mum on the phone,' Robert appeared in the kitchen then, clutching onto the landline phone and thrusting it in the direction of John.

'I bet you haven't even told her yet, have you?' Mary remarked, John frowning and indicating for Mary to be quiet with a finger to his lips. Taking the phone from Robert, John walked out of the kitchen, leaving Mary alone with her parents. Robert put an arm around his daughter, kissing her on the head.

'Hello darling, just a guess. John isn't in your good books?'

Once in his room, John composed himself before lifting the phone to his ear. 'Hello Mammy.'

'John, my boy. How are you? Got your own house yet?'

Thinking the answer would be self explanatory, seeing as she had rung Robert's home number, John rolled his eyes. 'No Mam.'

'Got a proper job yet?'

'Still a singer, Mam.'

'Found a new girl yet?'

'No Mam.'

John's mother, Iris, lived in London. She and John moved their from their native Dublin when John was eleven, just after his father had left the family home. Whereas John's Irish accent was only detectable on occasion, Iris had not lost a note of her Irish burr. John hadn't been back to Ireland since, except for a summer twenty five years previously, when he met his future wife.

'There is something I do have to tell you though, Mam. And it may disappoint you a little.'

'Johnny, you're in your mid forties, living in a box room at your best friends house. Your occupation is singing rubbish songs in stingy village halls every weekend. I'm pretty sure what you have to tell me can't disappoint me more than that.'

'Thanks for your honesty.'

'Well, who can you count on for the truth if not your old mammy, eh John?' Iris laughed, John smirking as the noise reverberated around his head. 'So, what is your news?'

Sighing, John closed his eyes and decided to just say it in one go and face the inevitable consequences which were to follow. 'I'm not proud of it, but it's happened and there is nothing I can do about it. I got someone pregnant, Mam. I'm going to be a Dad.'

'I'm sorry?' Iris replied in disbelief, John now stuttering over his words.

'Well, I... I...'

'You don't half get yourself in some situations, Johnny.' Iris interrupted. 'Do you at least know the woman's name?'

'Give me some credit.' John snapped back. 'Her name is Anna.'

'Oh right. And what does this Anna do?'

'Erm... I don't actually know...'

'Figures...' Iris added slyly.

'But she likes the Backstreet Boys. And Nsync.' John didn't know how telling his mother these facts would help his cause, but it was all he really knew about Anna.

'What the hell is an Nsync?' Iris yelled, before sighing deeply. 'And are you sure you are the Dad, and not one of these Backstreet Boys?'

'I truly believe it's mine, Mam.' John rubbed his brow before continuing. 'It is mine. And I don't have a clue what to do.'

'Well, you have to do good by this Anna.' Iris replied without missing a beat. 'That's what you have to do. I bought you up to accept responsibility. And you have a duty to the baby and it's mother.'

John had known in his heart ever since he heard the news that he would need to support Anna. However, it had taken his mother pointing it out to him in clear, unmistakable terms to bring it home to him.

'I know, Mammy. I know.'

'Listen to your old Mam,' Iris said, an encouraging lilt to her tone. 'Think of it this way. This chance may never come your way again. You have been given this fantastic opportunity to be a Dad.'

He hadn't thought about it like that. John had always imagined children would follow once he and Vera married, but his expectations had never materialised. John just brushed it off as one of those things, although he would often wonder what it would be like to have a child. A son to kick a ball about with in the garden, a daughter to spoil rotten. Now the chance had arisen. Not only did he owe it to Anna to stand by her, he also owed it to himself not to deny himself this opportunity.

'I think the answer is obvious,' John said with a broad smile spread across his face. 'I just needed my Mam to show me the way. As always.'

'And don't you forget it.' Iris agreed. 'Call Anna now. Then let me know you have. I am getting quite good at that texting malarkey.'

'Yes Mam. I'll call her now.'

'That's my boy.'

'Before you go, Mam. I hope I haven't let you down in any way. This wasn't meant to happen...'

'What's done is done, John.' Iris answered, matter-of-factly. 'You are my only son, you have never let me down a day in your life. The only way you would, would be if you turned your back on what is right. Now get off the phone and call Anna. Bye my darling.'

'Goodnight Mam.'

Hanging up, John walked to his bedside table and picked up his mobile phone. Finding Anna's number, he began to call. Feeling nervous, he paced the floor, waiting for her to answer. It took a number of rings, but Anna's voice soon filled his ears.

'Hi John,' Anna said softly, on hearing her John inhaled deeply.

'Anna, hello.' He took a moment to compose himself before continuing. 'Firstly, I'm sorry I have taken so long to call.'

'It's alright,' Anna lied. 'Have you come to a decision?'

'Can I take you out to dinner? Tomorrow night?' John decided to dodge the question, not wanting to talk about such matters over the phone. 'You can pick the restaurant.'

'Okay,' Anna replied with a sceptical voice, not sure whether this was a good sign or not. 'Is seven alright?'

'Perfect, I'll pick you up.'

'Thanks, see you then,' Anna said, going to hang up before remembering something she wanted to ask him. 'Oh John, just a quick question. Does your family have a history of mental illness?'

'Erm... not as far as I am aware. Why?'

'No reason, goodnight.'

Furrowing his brow, John hung up as he considered Anna's question. Looking down at his current attire, he thought there might be some substance to her enquiry.

* * *

As they waked from the car park to the restaurant, John hung back a little and allowed himself a glance at Anna. She really did look breathtaking, wearing a pale blue knee length dress, white cardigan and white shoes. Letting his eyes wander over every inch of her form, Anna soon realised she was being watched. Looking at him over her shoulder, she smirked as John's eyes met hers.

'Don't get used to this, pretty soon my ankles are going to be twice the size and I'll be waddling rather than walking.'

Startled at being rumbled, John backtracked a little. 'No, I... err..'

'It's alright John. I'm just joking.' Anna said with a laugh. He caught up with her then as they reached the upper concourse where the restaurants were situated. 'What do you fancy?'

'I'm not fussy,' John shrugged, looking around at the restaurants on offer. 'Just no pizza, Chinese or sushi.'

'That leaves the steakhouse then,' Anna giggled.

'Perfect, how did you know that's exactly what I wanted?' John smiled, gesturing in the direction of their chosen restaurant.

Once dinner was ordered, it was weighing on Anna's mind that the subject of the baby had not yet been broached. John seemed nervous, and Anna found it strangely engaging. Throughout their previous encounters, he had seemed the epitome of confidence yet tonight he had stuttered his way through their car journey and had now nearly spilt a jug of water over the waitress. Deciding to take the bull by the horns, Anna went ahead with bringing up the reason why they were here tonight.

'Blimey, that was embarrassing,' John chuckled, wiping the last drops of water he had spilt with his napkin.

'It's alright, I sense you're on edge.' Anna said sympathetically. 'So shall we just get down to it?'

'You make it sound like a business deal,' John replied, straightening his cutlery. 'Shall we wait until Hans can join us over the video phone from Zurich?'

'Ahh, you do it too.'

'Do what?'

'Use humour as a mechanism to disguise your nervousness.' Anna replied as John met her gaze. 'When I initially went to see my doctor I was cracking jokes about him touching my nipples.'

'Well, I think I can safely say the two of us are beyond that now.'

'Certainly we are,' Anna agreed as the waitress arrived with a fresh jug of water.

John waited for her to leave before continuing. 'Anna, I won't keep you in suspense any longer.'

'Okay,' she replied ominously. 'I meant what I said John. I can do this on my own...'

'Would it disappoint you then, if I said I wanted to be involved? As much as you feel comfortable with, of course.' Anna's face erupted into a smile, one which caused John's heartbeat to quicken. 'I want to be here for you, in whatever capacity you see fit. It's my mess, I need to clear it up.' John grimaced as soon as the words exited his mouth. 'That sounded better in my head.'

'I imagine it did,' Anna replied, although John was relieved to see she was still smiling. 'John, as far as I am concerned you can be as involved as much as you like. I'd like the baby to live with me, I'd like to think that goes without saying. But you can see it as often as you want, be a proper Dad. I don't want him or her growing up only seeing you every other weekend. A child needs both parents.'

John cleared his throat. 'I know. From personal experience.'

Anna didn't question John further on his remark as he shifted in his chair. What did occur to her suddenly was the need to get to know better the man sitting opposite her. All she knew was that he sang for a living, that was all. And that he had certain talents when it came to entertaining in the bedroom as well. Other than that, he really was a stranger.

'I think what should be our main priority right now is getting better acquainted.'

'Well, we've already slept together,' John replied as the waitress approached with his side order of garlic bread. 'I'm a fast mover when it comes to relationships but I usually take a girl out to dinner before sharing her bed.'

'Well, I'm already learning what a terrible sense of humour you have.'

Appearing hurt at her remark, John took a bite from his garlic bread before beginning to nod his head. Anna could tell he was becoming more comfortable in her company, his initial shyness relenting. 'But I agree, we do need to learn more about each other. I mean, I know you have beautiful legs and can dirty talk with the best of them, but what about your interests? What makes Anna, err... err... I don't even know your surname...'

'Smith.' Anna offered.

'What makes Anna Smith tick?'

'We should arrange a getting to know you evening.' Anna suggested. 'In a more private setting...'

'I thought we had that four weeks ago?'

'John,' Anna snapped impatiently. 'I mean, we are bringing a baby into the world together, so I want to know everything. '

'Everything?' John winced.

'Yes. There is so much I want to ask you.' Anna replied, reaching over to take a slice of John's garlic bread. 'Tomorrow night. Each of us prepare, say, twenty questions which we both have to promise to answer. No ifs. No buts.'

'Okay. We could make a night of it, each bring one film to watch. Nothing tells you about someone like their film choices.'

'I could invite Mary. And you could bring Robert and Cora.'

'Alright, but tell Mary beforehand I won't have any of her snide remarks.' John said, pouring himself a glass of water.

'You know Mary. I can tell her, but whether she listens...'

'Yeah, she's a typical woman.'

Anna raised her eyebrows before folding her arms in front of her. 'Wow, you really are intent on endearing me to you, aren't you?'

Thankfully for John, he didn't have to explain himself as the waitress arrived with their main courses.

* * *

On arrival at Anna's house, John felt a little uneasy as he entered the living room, DVD case under his arm, followed by Robert and Cora. Mary was already there, sitting in the armchair, glass of wine in hand. Anna had set up a table in the corner of the room, with a single chair. It felt like a job interview, John gingerly sat down on the sofa as Robert helped Anna prepare some drinks. Mary's gaze was upon him as she intermittently took sips from her wine glass.

'Good evening, Mary,' John said, staring straight ahead, placing his DVD on the arm of the sofa. 'Looking forward to this are we?'

'Look John...'

'Just John is it now? It used to be Uncle John...'

'My best friend is having your baby. I may have known you since I was fourteen and you may be godfather to my youngest sister, but Uncle John seems a little inappropriate now, wouldn't you say?'

'Point taken,' John replied with a nod, glancing sideward displaying a smirk which Mary reciprocated.

'Beer, John?' Robert said, handing John a can as he sat beside him on the sofa. Anna and Cora followed, Cora carrying a tray of food, Anna what seemed an encyclopaedia of questions to ask John.

'What's that?' John asked, his eyes focussed on Anna's folder.

'My questions,' Anna replied, sitting in the armchair opposite as Cora sat between Robert's legs on the floor. 'Where are yours?'

John reached into his shirt pocket and pulled out a crumpled up piece of paper. He waved the item in the air. 'Here.'

'That's it?' Mary questioned. 'This woman is the mother to your child and you only have one piece of paper worth of questions to ask her?'

'Well, I only really want to know what she does for a living,' John replied before taking a long sip of his beer. 'I learnt enough about her the morning after our night together when I left the house.'

'I'm a receptionist at a law firm,' Anna answered, slightly disappointed. 'What do you mean you learnt enough about me? What did you learn?'

'You like boy bands, eighties chick flicks and are either a compulsive eBay user or extremely gifted stalker.'

'And that's all you need to know?'

John shrugged as he looked around the room at everyone staring at him. He took another swig from his can before speaking again. 'Okay, I meant to start writing some questions but then I fell asleep and next thing I knew, Robert and Cora were knocking on my door to bring me here.'

'Thanks for making the effort,' Anna rolled her eyes as she stood up.

'Alright, how about this?' John began. 'We'll both answer your questions. How does that sound?' Anna stopped for a moment as she went over the questions she had prepared. 'Come on, Anna. What have you got to hide from me? With what we've already shared together not much I'd wager.'

'Very well,' Anna said resolutely. 'Sit at the table and we'll begin.'

John looked beside him and noticed another dining room chair. Standing up, he picked it up and carried it to the table. 'Only if you do too.'

'For God's sake, can we start please?' Mary exclaimed. 'Some of us want to be out of here by Christmas Day.'

As John and Anna sat opposite each other at the table, Cora stepped forward and took Anna's questions from her. Anna looked up at Cora, an uneasy expression on her face as she reluctantly let go of her folder.

'It's only fair,' Cora pointed out as she reached for another chair to join them at the table.

'Alright, I have nothing to hide.' Anna folded her arms as John stared at her, his face beaming. 'Let's do it.'

'Okay, to start with. How old are you both?'

'I've just turned thirty two.' Anna answered before looking at John. 'And you?'

'Forty one,' John replied which resulted in sniggering from Robert. John glared over his shoulder at his friend.

'What?' Robert asked. 'Why lie?'

'Very well,' John said before following his words with a heavily exhaled breath. He turned back to Anna. 'Forty five. But I must be doing alright if I pulled someone like Anna.'

'Yeah, lets just look over the fact she probably had over the limit of alcohol in her system that night,' Mary guffawed.

'No actually,' Anna interrupted. 'I was merry but not paralytic. I was attracted to John.'

'Oh yeah?' John raised his eyebrows, looking thoroughly pleased with himself. 'What attracted you to me?'

'Honestly?' Anna asked, John nodding in response. 'It was when you sang Hungry Eyes in your set. Dirty Dancing is my favourite film, and once you sang that, and sang it so well, for want of a better phrase, I knew I just had to have you.'

'Give me strength,' Mary exclaimed, standing up and walking towards the door. 'I'm going to get some more wine.'

'Alright, next question, ' Cora examined the page in front of her. 'Here's a good one. At what age did you lose your virginity?'

'Bloody hell,' Robert said with a hearty chuckle. 'Can you remember that far back, John?'

'If all you're going to do is mock me, leave now Robert,' John didn't bother to turn around when addressing his friend before articulating his answer. 'I was sixteen and it was with a girl I had been involved with for over a year.' There was an audible gasp of amazement from Mary as she walked back into the living room. John's tone was teasing as he continued. 'Yes Mary, it will shock you to know I wasn't always the womaniser you have deemed me as. Her name was Fiona and it was our way of saying goodbye. She was moving to America the next day. Broke my heart, so it did.' Robert and Mary erupted in a chorus of sympathetic noises, John closing his eyes in frustration. 'How about you, Anna?'

'I was nineteen, a late starter I guess.' She replied with an air of nonchalance. John was finding he couldn't take his eyes from her, his earlier remark about his ability to attract her wasn't without a hint of seriousness. John thought she really was beautiful. 'I had been going out with him for a few months, we were together throughout my early twenties...'

'Hairy Billy was your first?' Mary interrupted. 'Really? I thought you had loads of men by the time you were twenty...'

'Thank you for your candour and your wonderful opinion of me, Mary. Yes, Billy was my first, and he really wasn't that hairy,' Anna pointed out before her expression turned gooey. 'He had a six pack to die for and his behind was...'

'Stop, please,' Mary winced. 'I want to keep my dinner down. So does that mean you have only slept with four men?'

'Five, including John.' Anna locked his eyes with John as he shifted uncomfortably in his chair. 'What's the matter?'

'Nothing,' John replied, not able to meet Anna's gaze as he took another sip from his beer, finishing it in the process.

'I think my friend could be feeling a little embarrassed he hasn't exercised as much self control as your have, Anna.' Robert explained, standing up and tapping John on the shoulder. 'Another beer, mate?'

'Okay, how many women have you slept with?' Anna asked, John staring back at her, his face emotionless. 'Well?'

'I don't see what that has to do with me being a good father or not. And I also don't see what any of these questions have offered in regards to getting know each other better yet.'

'Nothing probably, but it's nice to see you squirm,' Mary said, leaning forward. 'Ten?'

'No, not ten,' John shook his head before looking at Robert who was smirking whilst holding a can of beer in his direction.

'It's more than that, isn't it mate?' Robert look thoroughly pleased with himself after revealing this about his friend.

'More than ten?' Anna exclaimed. 'I'm surprised you can remember one from the other.'

'I can too,' John insisted, although not entirely convincingly.

'Okay, who was your best shag?'

'You actually,' John replied, taking Anna aback. 'Same question to you.'

'Well I have to say you now to be polite.'

'Look, we're getting nowhere here.' Cora stood up and placed an arm around Anna's shoulders. 'John is a good man who suffered a traumatic experience. He had every right to sew his wild oats. He is a single man, who lets face it is also drop dead gorgeous.'

'I am sitting right here, Cora,' Robert moaned from behind her.

'What I am saying is getting to know each other isn't about asking a range of questions, it comes from spending time together. Do something together.'

'I think it's that doing something together that got them in this mess,' Mary uttered before downing the rest of her wine.

'I need some air,' Anna announced, getting up and walking outside.

John instantly stood as he watched Anna leave. For some reason he couldn't fathom, he felt the need to explain. Without a word he followed in the direction Anna had just taken, noticing the back door through the kitchen was open. Reaching the open doorway, John looked outside and saw Anna sitting at the garden table, rubbing her upper arms to keep warm. Placing his hands in his pockets, John carefully treaded the decking towards her.

'Look, Anna,' he began, his tone awkward. She immediately turned around to acknowledge his presence. 'Can I explain myself? Why I behave the way I do?'

'There is nothing to explain,' Anna replied, turning her attentions back to the tree at the back of her garden. 'It's none of my business what you get up to.'

'Yes, but it has clearly upset you, and I want to tell you about it, because what I am about to reveal probably sums up the man I am right now.'

'Alright,' Anna moved pulled a chair out from under the table and gestured for John to join her.

'It's probably best to start at the beginning.' John reasoned as he sat down. 'I met my ex wife, Vera on a trip back to my native Ireland.'

'You're Irish?'

'I am. I grew up in Dublin but moved to London when I was eleven. My Dad left me and my mam to live with another woman. I haven't seen him since.'

Anna placed a hand on her stomach. 'Which explains why you feel it's important to be there for the baby.'

'Yes. And for you as well. I wasn't the easiest to bring up after Dad left, my Mam could have done with the support.' Anna smiled at his remark before John continued. 'Well, I brought Vera back to London before I was transferred to the Yorkshire regiment. That's where I met Robert. He was a few years older than me, I looked up to him. Mary was a kind natured teenager.'

Anna laughed out loud at his statement. 'Cora and Robert must have been teenagers themselves when they had her.'

'Both were eighteen,' John replied. 'You could tell they were in love, that they weren't together purely for Mary's benefit. I envied them that. To get army accommodation together meant I had to marry Vera. We were in our late twenties. It was a comfortable life. We were never in love like Robert and Cora but we shared a passionate, fiery relationship. It was a case of I didn't want anyone else to have her, and she felt the same. I went through the army, worked my way up to sergeant but singing had always been my passion. So I decided when I came home from my last deployment, I'd leave the army and do something for me for a change.'

'What happened?'

'This happened,' John pulled up his trouser leg to reveal a scar from his knee to his ankle. 'You may not remember seeing it that night, but I took the blow for Robert. Saved his life, and lost my marriage in the process. Vera hated the sight of my leg, and the fact I had to use a cane for a time.'

'But you saved your best friends life,' Anna argued, her face displaying her confusion. 'Surely she would have been proud of you?'

'You'd like to think,' John replied as he set right his trouser leg. 'So disgusted was she that she started an affair. It nearly destroyed me, it's a poor excuse but it is one of the reasons for the way I am now. I find it hard to trust and therefore, find it hard to commit to just one person. I'm not proud of it Anna, the fact I have slept with so many women. At the time it makes me feel good but in the cold light of day I hate myself. And I am ashamed to think that to me, you were just another one to add to the list. I'm so sorry for what happened, but I want you to know I want to change. For the sake of the baby. I want him or her to be proud of their Daddy. Not hateful of him, or dare I say it, pitiful.'

'You've certainly revealed a lot about yourself,' Anna sat back in her chair, rubbing her brow.

'Well, if we are to raise a child together I felt you should know everything. And I hope it doesn't put you off. I want to change, I really do. Maybe this is what I have been waiting for.' They sat quietly for a moment, Anna trying to take everything in. John sighed deeply before breaking the silence that had fallen between them. 'Cora was right you know.'

'Why's that?'

'When she said the only way to get to know one another is through spending time together. We've been alone for five minutes and you already know more about me than most.'

'Yeah,' Anna agreed with a soft chuckle. 'I guess you're right.'

'So, how about this Friday? I take you out for the evening. Just me and you.'

Turning to look at him, Anna met John's eye. The sincerity she found there almost rendering her helpless as she found herself nodding. 'I'd really like that.'

'Great. Now come back inside. I've bought Herbie for us to watch.'

* * *

After picking Anna up, John refused to reveal all about his plans for the evening until they arrived at their destination. Anna groaned as soon as she realised where John was leading her to. A big luminous sign outside the venue gave his 'surprise' away, a karaoke night at a bar in town. John assured her she wouldn't have to sing if she really didn't want to although he warned her he would be partaking of a song or two.

John was the perfect gentleman, greeting her with a peck on the cheek and telling her how beautiful she looked on numerous occasions. Anna admitted to herself John didn't look too bad himself, dressed casually yet smart in a dark blue blazer, white shirt and jeans. He was wearing his glasses again, a look which Anna had to admit she was warming to. Not only was John clever and funny, he seemed to genuinely have a caring side to his nature as well. The way he behaved towards her was convincing Anna more and more that they could do this, they could raise a child together. Although he clearly had some issues he needed to overcome, Anna truly believed John meant it when he felt the baby could be the thing he needed to turn his life around.

After sitting with Anna for an hour or so, she could tell he was itching to get up on stage. It took the MC for the evening to encourage John to take the microphone, making it obvious to Anna this was a regular haunt for him. Anna looked on as John wowed the crowd with his rendition of _Summer of'69. _Urged to keep hold of the microphone, John followed this with _Addicted to Love _and his personal favourite, _Beautiful Day _by U2. After each song, he would seek out Anna's attention, looking for her approval. She did think he was a wonderful singer and he oozed charisma from every pore when he was on stage. It was obvious why the women fell for him. John then surprised Anna with his next song choice, a rendition of _Backstreet's Back_, dedicated especially to Anna. As soon as he began with the opening, 'Everybody,' she was on the dance floor, demonstrating to everyone the actual Backstreet Boys dance steps. As the song reached it's crescendo, Anna had an army of backing dancers trying to copy her moves, which was obvious to John she had practiced and perfected over the years.

However, his requests for Anna to join him on stage were becoming too difficult for her to ignore. In the end, after coaxing from others in the crowd as well, Anna finally accompanied John as they sang Islands In The Stream together. If she was awful, John didn't let her know as he gleefully stood behind her, swaying them both from side to side as they sang. Even as they became more engrossed in the song, it didn't go unnoticed by Anna that John's hand had found it's way to rest upon her stomach. The look in his eye as Anna met his gaze told her that he was registering the significance of his touch as well. A smile exchanged between them as the song ended said everything, the use of words redundant. The gathered guests, now sufficiently enough under the influence of alcohol to no longer be able to tell the difference if someone was out of tune or not, whooped and clapped. John and Anna's performance even moved one particularly merry reveller to tears.

As the evening drew to a close, Anna couldn't remember when she had laughed so much. The laughter continued to flow as John and Anna turned to walk down the street to her front door.

'I had a really great night, John. Thank you.'

'It was my pleasure,' John replied. 'And I got bookings for three more parties as a result of my hogging the microphone. I just hope I didn't come across as a big head.'

'Not at all,' Anna reassured him. 'If I could sing like you I'd never stop.'

'That's very kind.' They both stopped as they reached Anna's house. 'I really enjoyed singing with you. For various reasons.'

'It was nice,' Anna agreed, placing a hand on her stomach. 'This is your doing as well, it felt like we were cementing the agreement we have made. That we are in this together.'

'We are. And I think we're going to make a great team.' John's eyes were almost dancing as he spoke, Anna could tell just by looking at him how excited he was about becoming a father. 'So long as he or she gets your looks and my singing voice.'

'You cheeky beggar,' Anna laughed, playfully slapping John on the arm. 'But you're right. The baby doesn't stand much chance if it looks like you.' John erupted in laughter at her comeback, before she turned decidedly more serious. 'I have a lot of appointments coming up. I'd like you to be come with me, if that's alright?'

'Whatever you want. I am here for you to use however you see fit. Use me and abuse me.' John stopped as a glint formed in Anna's eye. 'And before you say it, I know I said the same words that night we spent together. But I mean this in an entirely different context this time.'

'Thank you.' Anna began to walk to her front door, John following her. 'I'll call you, we should try and make arrangements to meet often.'

'That would be nice,' John said as they reached Anna's front door. Turning to look at each other, Anna felt her heart skip a beat at the look on John's face. She was already beginning to realise she couldn't get enough of the way he smirked at her. And as he raised a hand to brush some hair from his eye, she struggled to keep her breath steady. 'I'll say goodnight then.'

'Goodnight John, and thanks for a wonderful evening.'

Feeling a little bold, possibly due to the alcohol he had consumed over the course of the evening, John placed a gentle hand on Anna's stomach. 'And goodnight to you, little one.'

Her face erupted into a smile as John's eyes met hers. Her voice was barely a whisper as she responded.

'They say goodnight as well.'

With Anna's words, John backed away, nodding in her direction before turning on his heels and walking back down her garden path. One more glance over his shoulder, and John was gone. Anna let go of a breath she had been holding ever since John had walked away, and walked inside.


	3. June

**A/N- As always, thanks for the reviews. I love reading them and I love the fact you all love this story. **

**An old friend makes an appearance in this chapter. And it's quite John centric. **

**Disclaimer-** _All things Downton belong to Julian Fellowes/ ITV/ Carnival..._

* * *

June was upon them, and with it warm weather which wasn't totally welcome on Anna's part. She was relieved the latter stages of her pregnancy would be through the winter months, she couldn't imagine carrying around all the extra weight in the stifling heat. As the pregnancy progressed, so did all the symptoms associated. Her sickness was off the scale, often she would miss whole mornings of work whilst she was otherwise engaged. With Gwen often carrying her own workload and Anna's, Anna would work later hours to make up for the time she was missing, adding to her tiredness as well. John was concerned for her wellbeing, often dropping into the office to see how she was. These little visits were much appreciated by Anna, often a conversation with John would go some way to brightening an otherwise dull day filled with licking envelopes and trips to the loo.

However, as June grew older the date for Anna's first scan came closer. The thirtieth to be exact. In the weeks leading up to the day, John and Anna spent more and more time together. John was serious when he said he wanted to be involved every step of the way, and Anna was equally as serious when she said she said it would wonderful if he was. His involvement even went as far as driving to a 24 hour supermarket at midnight, just because Anna had sent him a text to say she could murder a plate of mash potato and gravy. She hadn't meant for him to go and buy some for her, she was simply passing comment but within the hour John was knocking on her door, supermarket carrier bag in hand and was asking where the vegetable peeler was kept.

The Saturday before the Monday morning scan arrived and John was preparing for a gig, a fiftieth birthday party, as his phone rang. Normally he would ignore a call this late before a performance, but not with Anna. Standing in the little room 'backstage,' he answered.

'Hello Anna, everything alright?'

'John, what's the name of that programme.' For some reason John couldn't fathom, Anna was whispering. 'With that bull. They threw darts...'

'Bullseye?' John answered, slightly confused.

'That's it.' Anna hissed before John heard her talking to someone else. 'The answer to number seven is Bullseye.'

'Where are you?' John asked, no longer able to keep the better of his curiosity.

'Work pub quiz,' Anna replied in her hushed tone. 'Hang on, I'll just walk outside so I can talk to you.'

'Alright.'

John listened as Anna made her excuses, a few seconds passed before he heard her voice again. 'Sorry about that. The senior partners thought a quiz would be a good way of boosting team morale.'

'Is it working?'

'Not really. I'm on a team with Gwen and Natalie, the work experience girl.' Anna explained, John finding her despairing tone quite amusing. 'We don't know much about 80's TV shows or the names of football stadiums. As soon as the categories about nail polish, hair strengtheners and reality shows of the 21st century come up, we shall come into our own.'

'I don't doubt it,' John said with a smile.

'Do Wigan Athletic play at Wembley?' Anna asked in a way John considered quite random.

'No sweetheart, England play at Wembley.'

'Ah shoot, I should have listened to Natalie on that one.' John couldn't help but laugh out loud at Anna's words. 'What? If you had been here when Natalie tried to convince us Louis Armstrong was the first man on the moon, you wouldn't trust her judgement on who plays at which football stadium.'

'Point taken.' John replied. 'But you're okay? In yourself?'

'Well, I wasn't sick again for the second morning in a row, but I can't stop eating. This afternoon I was dipping chocolate mini rolls in ketchup.'

'Tasty,' John's tone was sarcastic as he looked at his watch. 'I have to start my gig in a minute...'

'Oh sorry, I forgot,' Anna gasped. 'I'll go now.'

'Honestly, it's fine.' John insisted, looking up as the daughter of the birthday boy peered around the curtain.

'We're ready for you, John,' she uttered, John nodding to acknowledge her whilst pointing at his phone. As the woman disappeared, John made his excuses.

'Enjoy your quiz, and I'll call you tomorrow.'

* * *

'Thank you very much, and happy birthday Tony. I'll hand you back to your DJ now.'

John handed the microphone back to the DJ as the opening notes of Bohemian Rhapsody began to fill the room. His gig had gone well, in particular his version of 'Dancing Queen' bringing the house down, a personal favourite of Tony's. As he jumped off the stage, Tony approached him, clearly extremely satisfied and clearly very much under the influence of liquor. Tony held his hand out to John, John taking it within his own and wincing as Tony gave him a rather assertive hand shake.

'You were fantastic,' Tony shouted, John wiping a drop of spittle that landed on his face as a result of Tony's enthusiasm. 'I wanted David Essex but you were much, much better.'

'Errr, thank you,' John replied, smiling awkwardly before tapping Tony's shoulder. 'Enjoy the rest of your evening, fella.'

He continued on then, his chosen destination the bar. A pint would go down nicely before he faced the dreaded task of travelling home on the train on a Saturday night. Approaching the bar, John began to observe the beers that were on offer before he heard a voice addressing him to his right.

'Going to buy me a drink, then?' the young lady asked, John turning his attentions to her.

He swallowed hard as he took in her appearance. Red hair that flowed over her shoulders, dark brown eyes, a short black dress that clung to her in all the right places. She was stunning. John knew what his answer would be in a heartbeat.

'Alright, what shall it be?'

'Rum and coke please,' she replied, edging a little closer to him before offering John her hand. 'I'm Ethel by the way.'

'John, John Bates.'

* * *

As one pint soon became three, John was becoming more and more attracted to Ethel. She really was very beautiful, exactly the type of woman he fell into the arms of after an evening like tonight. Anna was the furthest thing from his mind as they chatted about their favourite music, films and what they both did for a living. He just couldn't help himself. John knew in the back of his mind where this might lead, and how guilty he would feel in the cold light of day. But the way his marriage ended had sapped any remaining confidence out of him, when women like Ethel took an interest in him he couldn't help but fall under their charms. It happened with Anna, and it was happening again.

Before too long, John found himself following Ethel outside. She had convinced him to join her in a stroll, the gig tonight taking place in York. The summer evening proved to be a perfect backdrop for a stroll through the beautiful city. As they walked alongside the city walls, John listened to Ethel as she pointed out landmarks in her home town, although John's mind was already drifting to later on, and whether they would end up together this evening. John knew what he wanted, but Ethel's conversation had never really moved beyond talking about her job. Reaching a park, John finding some late night stragglers playing hide and seek to draw their evening to a close amusing, Ethel suggested they take a seat.

'So John,' Ethel asked as they sat down on a bench in the park. 'Is there someone special in your life?'

_Here we go, _John thought to himself. Usually he would answer this question with a unequivocal no. But just as he opened his mouth to speak, his mind was suddenly filled with thoughts of her. Thoughts of Anna. Then his child. Meeting Ethel's gaze, John could lie, spend the evening with Ethel and no one would be any the wiser. But he felt different. For the first time since he become divorced and had found himself in this situation, something in the back of his conscious was niggling away at him.

John let out a long sigh before leaning forward. 'There is someone, but not in the way you would imagine.'

'Oh God, you're not gay are you?' Ethel moaned.

'No,' John exclaimed, quick to dismiss Ethel's fears. 'It's a complicated situation.'

'You're bi then?'

'For goodness sake, no!' John said, rather more harshly than he intended. ' I am straight. It's just...'

'Have you just split up with someone?' Ethel asked, sympathy evident in her tone.

'I got a woman pregnant, a one night stand' John admitted, sitting back again and meeting Ethel's eye. 'We aren't a couple, but we have decided to raise the child together.'

'Are you in love with this woman?'

'No,' John answered without missing a beat before clearing his throat. His voice was rather weaker as he reiterated his answer. 'No.'

Ethel nodded her head slowly, her eyebrows raised. 'Right. Tell me about this woman.'

'Who, Anna?'

'I don't know,' Ethel shrugged her shoulders. 'Is that her name?'

'Yes, Anna. She's very pretty. Beautiful even. And has a wonderful sense of humour.' John was staring straight ahead now, a smirk across his face as he described Anna to his company. 'She's very excited at becoming a mum. To know I've been able to give that to her, well, it makes me feel great to be honest.'

'Sure you're not in love with her?' Ethel said with a slight chuckle, looking up as she sensed John not sharing her light hearted mood. 'Sorry.'

In the next instance, John was crushing his lips against Ethel's, wrapping his arms around her shoulder to bring her closer to him. It was as if he was trying to prove to himself, convince himself even that his feelings didn't run as deeply for Anna as Ethel was insinuating. Anything thing he felt for her was because she was the mother of his child, nothing more. As they moved apart, Ethel's eyes were still closed as she tried to catch her breath. John brushed his lips lightly against hers once again.

'I'd invite you back to mine but it's an hour's train journey from here.' John murmured.

'I live a ten minute walk from here,' Ethel offered weakly. 'Your welcome to come inside for a coffee, or whatever.'

* * *

Once inside Ethel's house, coffee was soon forgotten as she was dragging John up her stairs. He was an eager participant, his jacket and tie removed before they had even made it up to the top. Reaching Ethel's bedroom, they practically fell through the door such was John's enthusiasm. Laying beside her on the bed, no words were spoken as John brushed a hair away from Ethel's face. Resuming their kiss with vigour, John could feel himself reacting to the situation as his fingertips explored the skin of Ethel's thigh.

Ethel fiddling with John's belt buckle brought him crashing back down to earth. Anna was there again, at the forefront of his mind as Ethel's touch became more daring. Instantly panic stricken, John almost jumped to his feet, immediately setting himself right as a confused looking Ethel stared up at him. All he could think about was the promise he had made Anna, about wanting to change and the expression on her face if she ever found out what he was doing tonight.

'What is your problem?' Ethel snapped, straightening out her dress before moving to sit on the edge of the bed.

'I'm sorry,' John replied, running a hand through his dishevelled hair. 'I can't do this.'

'Why?' Ethel sulked, sitting back on the bed and hugging her knees. 'Don't you fancy me?'

'No, that's not it. I just can't.'

'Is it that woman? Anna is it? ' Ethel offered, John looking back at her with a blank expression. 'Well it's either that or something else.' Ethel settled her gaze just below John's midriff.

'No. It's definitely not that.' John answered before sitting on the edge of the bed to put his shoes on. 'I truly am sorry.'

'It's alright,' Ethel insisted as she watched John tie his laces. 'My husband will be home in an hour anyway.'

'What?' John exclaimed, looking up at her to see she was smiling. It was clear she was only joking with him. 'Good one.'

'Honestly though, if a man ever spoke about me in the way you spoke about this Anna, I'd do my damnedest to never let you go.'

'Thank you,' John replied with a nod. 'But she's far too good for the likes of me.'

'Oh, and I'm not?'

'Sensitive soul, aren't we?' John mocked, standing up looking for his jacket when he suddenly remembered it was left, discarded at the bottom of the stairs. 'No, the truth is I am simply a despicable human being, and it's time I started meaning what I say.'

'Well, I'm glad to be the reason for your epiphany,' Ethel's voice was sarcastic as she stood to show John out.

Walking down the stairs, John picked up his jacket before looking at his watch. 'Bollocks, I've missed the last train.'

'I'll call you a taxi if you go and make us a cup of coffee.' Ethel suggested, reaching for her landline phone. 'Kitchen is down there.'

'Alright,' John agreed, walking in the direction Ethel was now pointing. 'You know, I think this is the first time I have gone back to a woman's for coffee and actually had one.'

'And this is the first time I have been given the brush off,' Ethel replied. 'It's an evening of firsts.'

* * *

Finally arriving at Robert's house gone two in the morning, John trudged up the garden path, proud he was able to exercise an ounce of self control, relieved he would soon be able to rest his head. Reaching the front door, John put his hand in his pocket to fetch his key. Pulling it out of his pocket, he went to place it in the keyhole before realising it wouldn't fit. Squinting to take a better look, he soon knew why. He had brought out his car key, instead of the one that would unlock the door.

'Piss and bollocks,' he uttered under his breath. Stepping back to take in the house, everything was dark. Cora and Robert would be fast asleep, and it wouldn't be fair to wake them up. Especially with all they already did for him. Looking at his car key, then behind him at his Range Rover at the end of the drive, his options were simple.

'Sleeping in the car it is then,' John said to himself, running a hand through his hair. Walking towards his car he unlocked it, wincing as it made more noise than he would have liked. After finding a blanket in the boot, John opened the rear drivers side door very quietly and clambered inside. Using his jacket as a pillow, he covered himself in the blanket and tried to get comfortable.

It was going to be a long night.

* * *

Anna sat in the kitchen of the Crawley's home, looking around the room as Mary's parents rushed around, setting things up for their Sunday lunch. Anna had been invited along by Mary, who was in the other room on her phone to someone she had met the night before. She wondered inwardly whether John was home. Hearing a noise from behind her in the hallway, Anna looked expectedly over her shoulder only to see Mary approaching to rejoin them in the kitchen.

'Dad, do you remember your cousin, Reginald?' Mary asked, sitting beside Anna at the table.

'Reginald, Reginald...' Robert looked to the ceiling, still stirring the gravy he was preparing as he did so. 'Oh, Mancunian Reggie? I haven't seen him since I was dragged to his medical school graduation. How is the old fellow?'

'He died three years ago.' Mary said bluntly.

'So not too good then.' Cora replied, opening a cupboard and pulling out some serving dishes. 'I never met Reginald did I?'

'No, I met him not more than ten times in my life.' Robert replied. 'Why do you ask, Mary?'

'Oh, I'm going out for dinner with his son, Matthew.' Mary said in her usual blasé manner. 'I figured it was okay because he's like my cousin a billion times removed. We're hardly related.' Mary turned to look at Anna who was staring back at her, an amused grin on her face. 'What?

'Desperate are we, dear?' Anna remarked, causing Cora to begin giggling.

'You're one to talk,' Mary jibed, looking at Anna's stomach. 'Pregnant by a man old enough to be your father. And I'm desperate.'

'Talking of him, is he around?' Anna questioned, watching as Cora placed serving dishes of potatoes and parsnips in the middle of the table.

'Never came home last night,' Robert replied as he placed his gravy down on the table like it was some precious gold. 'It's a usual occurrence.'

'Thank you, Robert,' Cora scolded her husband as she added vegetables to the potatoes and parsnips on the table.

'Oh,' Anna said weakly, her appetite suddenly diminishing. 'You know suddenly, I'm not feeling too good.'

As the words fell from her mouth, the front doorbell went off. Furrowing his brow, Robert went to answer it.

'Are you okay?' Mary asked concerned, placing a supportive hand on Anna's back.

'What a night. I thought I'd...' John stopped dead as he saw Anna sitting at the table. 'Anna, hello.'

'Could you run me home, Mary?' Anna completely ignored John, standing up at the table. 'Sorry Cora, I just want to go home.'

'That's fine, love,' Cora smiled before glaring at John.

'Anna, I...'

'Come on, Anna,' Mary interrupted, walking past John into the hall. 'Save me a plate, Mum.'

John watched confused and open mouthed as Anna walked past him, affording him only a disappointed glance as she went. Once the door was shut, John turned to Robert and Cora.

'I don't get it?'

'I thought you had promised Anna you would change your ways, John,' Cora commented, sitting at the table and beginning to serve herself some dinner.

'What?' John was still confused as he joined them at the table. 'I haven't done anything.'

'So where were you last night?' Robert raised his eyebrows at John, awaiting an answer.

'I spent the night sleeping in the Range Rover,' John explained, picking a parsnip up in his hands and beginning to eat it. 'I forgot my key. I've only just woken up.'

'And you didn't meet anybody?'

'No,' John shook his head although Robert wasn't convinced. John looked at his friend who was running a critical eye over him. John let out a sigh before continuing. 'Alright, I met a woman.'

'John,' Cora cried, her voice tinged with discontent.

'Nothing happened. Honestly. I did get back to her place, but as soon as something started to happen, I just couldn't do it.'

'Don't worry mate, it happens to us all,' Robert reassured his friend as he began to cut his chicken.

'No, not because of that,' John replied, clearly frustrated. 'Because of Anna. And the baby. I want to change. I need to change. I have to go after her...'

'Probably not your best plan of action, John.' Cora advised as John stood up. He looked down, meeting Cora's gaze. 'Have a shower, give her a minute to calm down. Then call her and explain.'

'She's right,' Robert agreed through a mouthful of food. 'We'll save you some food.'

John relented, choosing to take Cora's advice. Standing up, he made his way upstairs to prepare for a shower.

* * *

Entering his bedroom after his shower, John picked up his trousers and fished around in the pocket for his phone. He had a message from Anna. He couldn't explain it, seeing her name on his screen made his heart beat race more than it ever had done in his life. Simply being with her made his heart race. Knowing she was currently thinking badly of him was more than he could take. Opening the message, he took a deep breath before beginning to read.

_John, I think it's best that we call off our agreement. I realise I am asking too much of you, you are who you are and it seems becoming a Dad can't change that. I'm so sorry..._

'Oh no. No, no, no,' John began to scramble for some clothes to put on, panic stricken as the words from Anna's text message reverberated around his head. It didn't look good, he could admit that to himself, but Anna needed to know how wrong she had construed the situation. Just as he was pulling on some jogging bottoms, his bedroom door flung open.

'John Bates!' John turned to see Mary standing in his doorway.

'Woah Mary, didn't your parents ever tell you to knock first?' John snapped, quickly putting on a t shirt.

'You are an absolute idiot!' Mary wailed, picking up a pillow from the chair in the corner of the room and launching it at John.

'Calm down,' John shouted back, raising his arms his face to protect himself from the impact of the pillow. 'I haven't done anything. Anna has got it all wrong.'

'Yeah, whatever...'

'Listen to me Mary,' John said as he approached her. 'Nothing happened . I forgot my door key, I slept in the car last night.'

'So you didn't share the evening with anybody?'

'Well, not exactly' John sighed.

'I knew it...'

'But I didn't go through with it,' John interrupted, beginning to put his shoes on. 'I need to speak to her.'

'Well, Anna doesn't want anything to do with you,' Mary said, folding her arms. 'So I wouldn't bother going around there. She won't talk to you. And I'm going with her to the scan tomorrow.'

'But I haven't done anything wrong,' John insisted, rubbing a hand over his brow.

'Sorry John.' Mary left then, closing the door behind her.

* * *

John arrived at the hospital with no idea where to go. These places had always confused him. Walking into Accident and Emergency, John watched as people rushed around him. He had no idea which way the maternity ward was, standing in the middle of the room completely confused.

'Can I help you sir?' The receptionist called, John instantly turning in the direction of the woman's voice.

'Erm, yeah. Where would I need to be if my... err.. if I wanted to...' John was flustering, the receptionist becoming increasingly impatient. 'Baby scans. Where do they happen?'

'Yes sir. You need the third floor,' the receptionist offered helpfully before pointing beyond John. 'The lifts are just behind you.'

John looked over his shoulder before looking back at the receptionist. 'Thank you.'

Moving towards the lifts, John waited, hands in his pockets as he tapped his foot nervously. A late night phone call to his mother had convinced him to rush here today. As he let Anna's text message sink in, the less he felt like he had anything to apologise for. He hadn't done anything wrong, yet his mother explained to him Anna wouldn't see it like that. Whether he went through with it or not was irrelevant, he had intended to spend the night with another woman, even after promising to Anna he would change. Iris made him see he should have never put himself in that position. She also pointed out both he and Anna were spectacularly missing the main point- the welfare of the child Anna was carrying. The baby was the most important part of all of this. He owed it to his unborn child to make things right.

Reaching the third floor, John groaned inwardly as he saw yet another reception desk. Stepping gingerly towards it, his attention was caught by a voice to his left.

'John?'

He turned to see Anna and Mary sitting together, Anna jiggling her legs up and down.

'I thought I told you to stay away,' Mary hissed, rather dramatically.

'Settle down Mary. This isn't Eastenders.' John replied before looking at Anna. 'Are you alright? Why are you moving your legs like that?'

'Oh, I need a wee,' Anna explained. 'I've had to drink loads of water this morning to make the scan clearer.'

'I see,' John nodded before silence descended upon them

'For goodness sake,' Mary huffed after a few seconds, folding her arms. 'Just say what you have to and go.'

'Anna, could I speak to you in private?'

'No...'

'Yes, you can,' Anna interrupted Mary, rising to her feet. John let out a sigh of relief as he followed Anna.

'What is her problem?' John asked as they reached the relative solitude of a close by corridor.

'She's just looking out for me,' Anna replied, stopping and turning to face John. 'So, what have you got to say.'

'Well, firstly I haven't technically done anything wrong,' John began, provoking a reaction from Anna which he was quick to alleviate. 'But obviously you feel I did. So I'm sorry. But let me explain. I did spend the evening with a woman.'

'John...'

'No, hear me out. I need to say this. I went back to her house, and things got rather heated.'

'I don't want to hear this...'

John carried on regardless. ' I didn't go through with it. I couldn't, because all I could think about was you. For the first time since I got divorced, I thought of someone else other than myself. I imagined the look on your face, the one you gave me when I walked in yesterday and it broke my heart in two. I don't want to be the reason for you to be feeling like that. I want to make you smile, be your support over the next few months.'

'You didn't sleep with her?'

'No, I didn't.' John shook his head. 'It's time to face up to my responsibilities.'

'You're right though, John. It was unfair of me to react the way I did,' Anna admitted, smiling slightly. 'I mean, we aren't even together.'

'But I made a promise to you, that I would stop the sleeping around,' John argued. 'And I promise I will. But the baby should be our main concern. Shouldn't he? Or she?'

'Yes,' Anna agreed. 'He or she should.'

'And we're a team. Aren't we?'

'We are.'

'So, can I come to the scan?' John continued, giving Anna a smirk that made her knees feel like they would give way from underneath her. Anna nodded, the effect his smirk was having on her rendering speech futile. 'Fantastic.'

'What's going on then?' Mary appeared in the corridor, bag over her shoulder. 'I took an hour out of work, can I go back?'

'Yes, you can Mary,' Anna replied.

'Good,' Mary answered with a smile. 'You two need your heads knocking together. Arguing like an old married couple. Come over and show me the picture later. Good luck.'

* * *

'So, Miss Smith, this might be a little cold on your belly.'

The sonographer spread the gel over Anna's stomach, she squealing in response as it came into contact with her skin.

'Don't press too hard on my stomach or we might have a situation, the amount of water I have drunk' Anna joked, John chuckling as he watched her intently. She looked so excited, it warmed his heart as he took in the smile on he face. Then she turned to look at him and John was sure he had stopped breathing. She had a smile that John was sure he would never grow tired of seeing. Making eye contact with her affected him in ways he couldn't describe.

'So, how long have mum and dad been together?' the sonographer asked absent- mindedly, clearly their intentions to make Anna and John feel comfortable.

'Erm, we're not together,' Anna answered.

'Oh God, I'm sorry I shouldn't have asked that.'

'It's alright,' Anna insisted, turning to John who was shifting uncomfortably in his chair. 'We're still bringing up the baby together. Aren't we, John?'

'We are,' John nodded, resting his arms up on the edge of the bed.

'Well, that's good to hear.' the sonographer continued as she pressed a few buttons on the monitor in front of them. 'And if you look now, you'll see your baby on the screen.' She reached for a pen from her pocket. 'That small oval there, is your baby's head.'

'Look John,' Anna said excitedly, 'Our baby has a head.'

John laughed out loud at her comment before replying. 'Thank goodness for that.'

'And although it is still very early to hear the heartbeat,' she began, before clicking onto a different screen featuring a series of moving lines like those you would see on a heart monitor. 'Here you can see that the babies heartbeat is very strong.'

'Oh John,' Anna whimpered, taking hold of his hand.

'You have a very healthy baby here, and it appears everything is going beautifully, Anna.'

'Thank God.' John whispered, Anna taken aback as she looked at him, a solitary tear falling down his cheek. 'This is incredible. Our baby.'

She couldn't take her eyes from John as he watched the screen attentively, taking every little thing in. John had never shown this side to him, and Anna could feel her heart melt at the sight of him.

'Now, I am going to take some measurements, and I should be able to give you a due date.' The sonographer stood up. 'I take it you'd like two copies of this scan picture?'

'Please,' John answered, his voice raw with emotion.

'Are you alright?' Anna asked John as the doctor moved over to the other side of the room.

'Just completely and utterly overwhelmed. This just makes everything so much more real.'

'It's wonderful though, isn't it?' Anna whispered, squeezing John's hand.

'God yes, it's amazing. Thank you Anna. For giving me this. It's the most wonderful thing I've ever seen.'

* * *

Standing on Anna's doorstep, both were still buzzing as they discussed the new details they knew about their baby.

'So a Christmas baby,' Anna remarked. '22nd December.'

'Couldn't have planned it better,' John replied with a raise of his right eyebrow.

'Yeah, I might be in hospital over Christmas. Fantastic,' Anna said unenthusiastically as she unlocked her front door.

'Don't worry, I'll be there as much as I am allowed to be,' John reassured her.

'You coming in?' Anna asked, turning to face John.

'I can't, I have a gig at a retirement party,' John explained, looking at his watch. 'Should be finished by seven so how about I take us out for a celebratory meal afterwards?'

'So long as you don't mind Mary being there. I promised I would see her tonight, and you see what she's like when she's upset.'

'Quite, well why don't I ask Robert and Cora along as well?' John suggested. 'We could go to the...'

'Steakhouse?' Anna interrupted with a grin.

'No, I'm that happy with events today you can choose the restaurant...'

'Just not Chinese, sushi or pizza.'

'Exactly.' John laughed. 'You're getting to know me better now.'

'I am,' Anna nodded her head.

'And?'

'You're alright.' Anna placed a hand on John's upper arm. 'More than alright.'

'Look Anna, I just wanted to say again I'm sorry about what happened.'

'It's fine John, honestly. I overreacted.'

'Maybe,' John agreed, smiling shyly. Truly believing that Anna would never be interested him for any other reason than that he was the father of her child, John had to get something off his chest. 'But as you said we aren't together. We both know what I've promised to you, I don't need to reiterate it. But that doesn't mean I might not meet someone in the future, someone I am serious about. I'm not saying I will, but if I do I don't want it to come between us. Just like I hope it wouldn't if you met someone. We are having a baby together, something to link us for the rest of our lives and our child should be our main priority. As long as we are both committed to the baby, that should be all that matters.'

'Yes,' Anna agreed weakly. brushing a strand of hair from her eyes. 'Okay. And I am sorry for flying off the handle.'

'It's fine, honestly. I'll pick you up about half 7.' John began to retreat back down the garden path before looking back over his shoulder at Anna. 'Could you make the arrangements with the others?'

'Alright.'

'Have a nice afternoon, Mum.'

Anna released a small chuckle at his words. 'I hope the gig goes well, Dad.'

Saluting her before opening the car door, John got inside. Anna stood and watched as he drove away. It was amazing how she could go from feeling so euphoric to so downhearted in such a short space of time. Seeing her baby had been magical. The way John had reacted to seeing their child on the monitor, Anna had never seen a man that emotional before in her life. The way he had behaved towards her ever since they had decided to face this united, no man had ever treated her with such respect.

Then, John's words about meeting someone else had made her heart sink. The feelings that rushed through her when she thought he had been with another woman had almost convinced her of it. And now with his words about being with someone else, it was impossible to ignore. No longer did she doubt. She knew.

Anna was in love with John.


	4. July

**A/N- Thanks for all your reviews, I appreciate each and every one. **

**In this chapter, parents are met, ice creams are eaten and surnames are discussed. This chapter is a bit busy and dialogue heavy, but I hope it reads okay. **

**Disclaimer:**_ All things Downton belong to Julian Fellowes/ ITV/ Carnival_

* * *

'You're not wearing that, are you?'

John stopped dead in his tracks in the kitchen doorway, immediately looking down as Mary's critical tone filled his ears. Looking up, he saw Mary and her parents sitting around the table, their youngest daughter Sybil leaning against the counter.

'What?' John put his hands in his pockets. 'I'm only going to Anna's parents for Sunday lunch. It's not like I'm marrying her.'

'No, you just got their only daughter pregnant when you aren't even in a relationship,' Cora replied, 'I don't know what's worse.'

'Come on, mate,' Robert's tone was patronising although John decided to ignore that fact and listen to what he had to say. 'The jeans are smart enough, the boots look good but you cannot wear that T- shirt.'

'It's just a joke,' John shrugged, straightening out his shirt. 'To break the ice.'

'Who's The Daddy?' Sybil read out loud, chuckling as she did so. 'That's inspired.'

'See, I knew my little Goddaughter would be on my side,' John walked to Sybil and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

'You can't wear that, John,' Mary reiterated her earlier statement before rising to her feet. 'Come on, I'll help you pick a new one.'

Mary took hold of John's hand and began to pull him in the direction he had just come from. No words were exchanged as John followed reluctantly behind her. Once in his room, Mary preceded to his wardrobe and swung it's doors open.

'Don't mind me,' John sat on the edge of his bed, watching as Mary flicked through his clothes collection. 'Really. Please don't.'

She didn't afford him a look as she continued to rifle through his wardrobe. 'John, you knew you wouldn't get out of this house in that T shirt, didn't you?'

'I didn't know you were here,' John replied, leaning back on the bed. 'If I had I would have snuck out the front door.'

Sighing deeply, Mary turned to look at him, folding her arms. Her features softened as she regarded him. 'Anna has had to talk you up to her parents as it is. A one night stand resulting in a pregnancy.'

'She's a grown woman, capable of making her own decisions,' was John's rebuttal as he met Mary's gaze. She didn't reply, choosing to remain silent as her eyes bored into him. 'What?'

'Okay John, put it this way,' Mary began, taking a couple of steps closer to the bed. 'Let's imagine your baby is a girl. Said girl comes to you in thirty years and says, 'Hi Dad, I had a one night stand, never intended to meet the bloke again but now I have to because he has impregnated me.''

John tilted his head to the side whilst he mulled Mary's scenario over in his head. 'I have a light blue polo shirt in their somewhere.'

Joining Mary at the wardrobe, John pulled out the item he suggested, holding it up in front of him. Mary's lips upturned into a smile, she nodding her head slightly.

'Much better.' She turned to leave the room, allowing John some privacy to change. As her hand came into contact with the door handle, she heard John speak.

'Truth is, Mary, I'm scared stiff,' He admitted, sinking back onto the bed once more. 'I haven't been this nervous in my life, not even when on missions in my deployments. This is huge and I feel like I am completely out of my depth. And hearing you say Anna has had to talk me up when in the company of her parents, it makes it even worse. It doesn't help I have all the charm of a.. a...'

'Cucumber?'

John exhaled deeply before looking up at Mary. 'Random but not far off the mark.'

'I'm joking,' Mary chuckled, sitting beside John on his bed. 'For as long as I have known you John, you have been one of the nicest blokes I have ever met. Yes, your taste in clothing leaves a lot to be desired but your heart is in the right place. You'd be the first to admit you lost your way a little with the divorce and everything, but you've promised you'll change for Anna and the baby and I truly believe you are doing a great job in supporting my best friend.'

'Thank you.' John acknowledged Mary's comment by tapping her hand. 'Any advice on how to face Anna's parents? You must know them quite well.'

'Yeah, don't tell any of your jokes, and I use the term jokes lightly...'

'Hey..'

'Dad may find them funny but that's because he has all the intellect of a cactus.' Mary continued, rising from the bed to walk towards the door once more. Upon reaching it, she turned to look at John. 'They are excited to be becoming Grandparents. Just leave them in doubt as to your intentions to be a hands on Dad, and to offer Anna all the support you can. It is a tricky situation, but what else can you do.' Mary began to chuckle once more before adding, 'unless you marry her of course.' Mary's laughter died down abruptly as John didn't see the funny side in her remark. It appeared he was taking her suggestion seriously. 'Oh God, don't propose. That will make things a million times worse.'

'It's lucky for you that the thought of committing myself to one person for the rest of my life makes me sick to my stomach,' John replied, although his voice lacked conviction. It seemed Anna had changed his mind on so many things he believed, or thought he believed. 'Now leave, so I can change. I don't want to scar you for life with images of my naked torso engrained on your memory.'

* * *

As they arrived outside Anna's parents house in John's Range Rover, Anna was very aware of the face John hadn't said more than two words since he had picked her up. It wasn't like him, especially recently when they had been so comfortable in each others company. John turned off the ignition before turning to look at the house. Anna's gaze was trained in on his face, he almost looked grey as he took in the sight of her childhood home. She startled John a little as she wrapped her fingers around his. Moving his head to look at her, Anna smiled sympathetically before squeezing his hand.

'Before we go in, are you alright?' Anna asked, John shifting uncomfortably as he considered her question.

'Honestly? I can't remember a time in my life when I was as nervous as I am right now.'

'Oh John, there's really no need to be...'

'Well I think there is,' he interrupted, meeting her gaze. 'I have got their only daughter pregnant, with no intention of making an honest woman of her, hell we aren't even together.' John let go of her hand and rested his head on the steering wheel before continuing. 'I'm despicable. Mary ran a scenario over in my mind earlier, that what if the baby came home one day and told me what you had to tell you're parents. I was horrified.'

'Look at me, John.'

'I can't,' he almost wailed, Anna ashamed to admit she was finding the a little amusement in the situation.

'John,' her voice was sterner now as John lifted his head to be met with her beautiful smile. He tried to mirror her expression, but attempts to do so were futile. 'Mum and Dad were not overly impressed when I originally told them. That was because you hadn't informed me of your intentions yet. Now they know, they are thrilled they are to become grandparents and they admire you for doing what you are. Because believe me, most men would have run a mile.'

'Really? Mary said...'

'Don't listen to Mary,' Anna interrupted. 'They are looking forward to meeting you. The real you. You are usually so confident. Relax, it will all be fine.'

Anna got out of the car then, John doing the same before locking the car. Anna stood beside him, looking up into his face as he took one final deep breath. Reaching for his hand, she took it in hers once more before leading him down the garden path. John hadn't realised until now, so caught up in his own world that Anna was really showing today. They hadn't seen each other for a week or so, Anna's work commitments meaning a meeting wasn't possible but it seemed she had suddenly bloomed in the time they had been apart.

'You're showing an adorable little bump in that dress, Miss Smith,' John informed her with a shaky voice.

Anna's eyes immediately met his as they reached the front door. 'I know, Mr Bates. It's all stretch marks and looking unattractive from hereon in.'

'On the contrary, the look suits you,' John replied with all the sincerity he could muster.

'There we go, there's the confident man I know.' Anna's voice was almost sing-song as she rang the doorbell. 'You know that pale blue really suits you.'

'Good afternoon, darling.'

The door burst open and a woman, John guessed to be Anna's mother, threw her arms around her daughter, kissing her on the cheek. She was the same build as Anna, had the same blonde hair although it was cut into a bob. She was basically Anna in thirty years time. They looked so similar John almost couldn't believe it. He stood back as she enquired to Anna's well being, before her gaze moved on to him.

'So this is the father of my first grandchild, is it?'

'No, I just brought some other random over, Mother,' Anna joked although John didn't really appreciate it at this very moment. 'Yes, this is John.'

'John Bates,' he announced, holding out his hand. Anna's mother accepted his hand, shaking it briefly.

'Nice to meet you John. My name is Linda.' She smiled, her voice friendly. 'I'm Anna's mum.'

'Yeah, I think he got that,' Anna said with a laugh, looking up at John who was smiling as well.

'Do come in, Anna's Dad and her brother are in front of the telly watching the football,' Linda stepped aside to allow Anna and John to walk in.

'Darren is here too?' Anna asked as her mum shut the door.

'Yes love, he's fallen out with Poppy again.'

'Again?' Anna rolled her eyes.

As they continued to chat amongst themselves in the hallway, John's eyes were immediately drawn to pictures on the wall of Anna in her childhood. She was joined in most of them by a small boy, who John know knew must be her little brother, Darren. She really was the most adorable little girl, John couldn't help but smile as he studied each picture in turn. Linda had continued into the living room, but Anna stopped when she realised John wasn't beside her. Looking back, she saw him staring intently at one of Anna's school pictures.

'Are you coming to meet everyone?' Anna asked him, before walking towards where he was standing and looking at the picture he was studying. 'I was fifteen in that picture.'

'You haven't changed a bit. I know one thing, I hope our child gets your looks.' John admitted, before looking down at Anna. 'You look really pretty today.'

'Thank you,' Anna blushed at his words before leading him to the living room.

Although a little strange to note at a time like this, the first thing John noticed was the size of the television. It was huge, and a man who must be Anna's Dad was sitting in an armchair not two metres away from it. John then looked to the sofa and saw a younger man, short blonde hair the same colour as Anna's staring intently at the screen.

'Trevor, Darren, John is here.' Linda announced, moving forwards to pick up the television remote and pressing mute. Both men stood to look at John, Anna standing beside him with her arm linked through his.

Trevor was of a similar build to John, although he displayed a head full of white hair. Darren was stocky, tall and John decided there and then someone he wouldn't like to get on the wrong side of. Both men wore unreadable expressions as the elder of the two moved towards John.

'So you're John?' Trevor asked as he stopped in front of him.

'Yes, John Bates,' John replied, feeling slightly uncomfortable although Anna's fingers squeezing his arm were most welcome, making him feel slightly less uneasy.

'Can I just say...' He paused for a moment, John's heart beating so fast he could hear it thundering in his ears. Trevor raised his hand, John unsure what he was going to do until he rested his hand on John's shoulder. 'How much I am grateful for you not turning your back on Anna. So many men would have done but you haven't, and that is admirable.'

'Thank you sir,' John replied, letting out a breath before Anna's brother approached him as well.

'Alright mate, I'm Darren,' Anna's brother shook John's hand before pointing in the direction of the television. 'You a football fan?'

'Erm, yeah as it happens. I am.' John nodded, looking at the TV.

'Take a seat,' Trevor offered, pointing at the sofa as he moved back to his armchair. 'Let the ladies catch up in the kitchen and join me and Dazza in here.'

'Alright,' John replied, looking down at Anna who was beaming. John couldn't believe he had felt so nervous, he had been foolish to be. He should have known if Anna was anything to go by, her family would have been equally as charming, as they had been as soon as he had walked through the front door.

'Linda, love,' Trevor called to his wife. 'Three beers please?'

'Yes dear, you just sit there and relax,' her tone was sarcastic but Trevor didn't seem to notice.

'Thanks love,' he called back as he restored sound to the television. Anna followed her mother into the kitchen as John sat beside Darren on the sofa. 'Who do you support then, John?'

'Ahh,' John replied, rather reluctant to reveal his team when sitting beside two men from Yorkshire. 'You tell me who you support then I'll let you know.'

'Leeds,' Darren replied as Anna and Linda returned with three glasses and three cans of beer.

'Well then, maybe it's best I keep my team to myself,' John replied as he met Anna's gaze, winking as he took a glass from her.

'Lunch should be half an hour or so,' Linda informed the boys, John looking at her to acknowledge her remark as Trevor continued to talk. She was smiling warmly in his direction.

'Come on, John. You have to tell us now,' Trevor insisted, pouring his beer into the glass. 'We need to know what team you are going to inflict on the little one to find out if myself and Darrem should draw up plans to interject.'

'Oh for goodness sake,' Linda exclaimed, John chuckling away as filled his own glass, Anna perched on the arm of the sofa beside him. 'It's only a game.' She turned her attentions to Anna. 'Anna, I need you to make the gravy.'

'Yes Mum,' Anna sighed, squeezing John's shoulder before she walked away. Once in the kitchen, Linda closed the door behind them.

'You're in love with him, aren't you?'

Anna was taken aback by her mother's remark, moving her lips to protest but no sound was forthcoming. Her mother was leant back against the kitchen counter, her arms folded. She knew she had called this correctly, no one knew Anna like she did.

'What makes you say that?' Anna asked sheepishly, moving to the cupboard and pulling out a jar containing the gravy granules.

'We're having beef, not chicken. You'll need the red lidded one.' Linda advised her daughter. 'And I've seen the little touches, the way you look at him.'

'Firstly, how many different gravies does one woman need?' Anna exclaimed, pulling out a green lidded one, then a blue before finding the one with a red a lid. 'And secondly, we get on well. Doesn't mean I am in love with him.'

'Put the others back first, please,' Linda requested as Anna began to fill a saucepan with water. Anna sighed as she put the jars back in their rightful place. 'Anna, I know you.' Placing the saucepan on the hob to allow the water to boil, Anna remained focussed on her task as he mother continued to speak. 'You do know you can make that by just boiling the kettle?'

Anna looked at her mum, the understanding she found in her expression making Anna realise if there was one person she could never fool, it was her mother. She began to fill the kettle with water now, leaving the saucepan boiling on the hob. Linda stepped forward and turned it off, still waiting for her daughter to respond.

'He'll never be anything more to me than the father of my child. He's said as much. After his divorce, he never wants anything serious again.'

'Hmmm,' Linda's tone was cynical as she opened the oven to check on the status of her potatoes.

'What do you mean, hmmm?'

'Nothing darling,' Linda replied, closing the oven door once more.

'Come off it, Mum,' Anna groaned. 'You saying hmmm like that can only mean one of two things. You aren't really listening, or you disagree with what I am saying.'

'All I know, is that I have been in the company of the two of you for ten minutes at best, and if I didn't know better I'd have thought you were together. The way he looks at you, well if a man ever looked at me like that I'd be putty in his hands. He's gorgeous, isn't he?'

Their conversation was interrupted with a cheer coming from the living room. Linda opened the one side of the serving hatch and saw the three men laughing, Anna looking over her mother's shoulder at the situation as well. She felt a pang of longing in her stomach as she looked at John, the smile on his face illuminating his features.

'Boys, lunch will be ten minutes,' Linda called through to them before shutting the hatch. She turned to her daughter, Anna seemingly frozen in time as she stared at the now closed serving hatch. 'Anna, the kettle's boiled.'

* * *

When lunch was devoured and the football watched, Anna, her family and John sat in the living room. She had feared this, yet Anna had forgotten until she saw her mother carrying the box. Baby photo albums. For a whole hour, she had spoken John through every one. He was either a really good actor, or actually interested as he had hung on Linda's every word. Anna watched him, glasses resting on the end of his nose as he inspected every photograph closely, occasionally affording Anna a glance over his shoulder. Now, as they sat in Anna's kitchen, she was curious to know what John thought of her family.

'Darren is a great lad,' John remarked, before taking a sip of his tea. 'And your Mum and Dad seem wonderful. They are obviously very proud of you.'

'Yeah, once they got their head around this.' She placed a hand on her stomach, rubbing the bulge forming there softly.

'They came across as very excited,' John replied, gazing at Anna's stomach with a small smile. 'As am I.'

'Really?' Anna looked up to meet his gaze, he taking another swig from his drink as she did so. 'What are you most looking forward to?'

'I don't know,' John shrugged, placing his mug back down on the table. 'I seem to think about the little things. I like to imagine the little tag they wear when in the hospital, Baby Bates written on it...'

'Hang on a minute,' Anna interrupted, 'Baby Smith.'

'What?'

'Well, we have no intention of marrying and it will be living with me...'

'But the baby always takes the father's name,' John argued, sitting forward.

'Come on, John. This is the twenty first century.' Anna argued back.

'Alright, how about double barrelling it? Bates- Smith.' John suggested, Anna's grimace causing him to then change it around. 'Smith- Bates?'

'Sounds like an Estate Agents,' Anna laughed, meeting John's gaze who was laughing too.

'Well, you have a week to change your mind,' John advised. 'My mother is coming to stay and she'll be horrified if Bates isn't in there somewhere.'

'Your Mum?'

'Yeah,' John nodded, 'she's dying to meet you.'

'And now it's my turn to be nervous,' Anna sighed, locking John's eyes with her own. 'Thank you. For today. It meant a lot.'

'My pleasure. It's another obstacle out of the way. One of many I'm sure we're going to endure over the next eighteen or so years.'

'As long as I'm facing them with you, they don't seem so frightening.'

As soon as the words were out of her mouth, Anna regretted them although the way John was looking at her right now told Anna he didn't feel uncomfortable with her admission, quite the opposite. As their eye contact remained, their silent link was broken by the doorbell.

'Oh, that will be Mary,' Anna sighed, looking beyond John and down the hall.

'That's my cue to leave,' John replied, standing up.

'Oh you don't have to,' Anna was quick to say, placing a hand on John's forearm. 'Please, stay.'

'I've got a gig this evening,' John looked down at Anna's hand placed upon his arm. He put his own hand over the top of hers. 'I'll call you when I get in tonight. It won't be late. I'll let Her Majesty in on my way out.'

Mary's knocking on the door startled them both, Anna removing her hand from John's arm immediately. With a small nod of the head, John walked out of the kitchen and down the hall.

* * *

'The beach?' Iris exclaimed, looking at each house in turn down the street they were driving along until John bought the car to a stop outside Anna's. 'Johnny, when have me and beaches ever got along?'

'Come on, Mam. I wanted us all to do something nice together. Anna's nervous, so I chose somewhere neutral so we could all feel comfortable.'

'She's meeting me, not the Queen,' Iris shook her head as John exited the car, moving around to his mother's side and opening the door. Holding out his hand, John took it before helping her down to the pavement.

'Mammy, you know you are my Queen.'

'Flattery will get you nowhere, John Bates.' Iris replied sharply, shutting the door behind her. No more words were exchanged as John lead his mother up the path to Anna's front door. Ringing the doorbell, John shifted nervously from foot to foot. 'Don't fidget, John.'

In the next moment, Anna opened the door. She was smiling, although John could tell she looked a little nervous. 'Hello Anna.'

'John,' Anna answered, before looking at Iris.

'This is my mam, Iris,' John replied, gesturing towards the lady standing beside him. 'Mam, this is Anna.'

'Hello there, Anna.' Iris said cheerfully.

'Hello Iris, it's lovely to meet you.'

'Well, you're the first person to say that to me and no mistake,' Iris chuckled. 'We thought we might come in for some tea before setting off. If that's alright?'

'Of course,' Anna stepped aside as Iris made her way into her house. John arched his eyebrows in Anna's direction before placing a reassuring hand on her upper arm.

'It will be fine,' he whispered, closing the door behind him. Iris had already found her way into the kitchen, the kettle already boiling. Anna smiled as she looked up at John rolling his eyes. 'She's not backwards in coming forwards, maybe I should have warned you about that before now.'

'It's fine, honestly...'

'Are you two young people going to join me in here?' Iris called from the kitchen. 'Well, when I say young I mean the young lady and John.'

Bursting out laughing, Anna raised a hand to her mouth as she regarded the look on John's face. She could tell this day was going to be harder for him, than it would be for herself.

'I haven't told you how wonderful you look today,' John remarked, returning to the car with a car parking ticket.

'Thank you, Johnny,' Iris replied, taking John by surprise.

'I was actually talking to Anna...'

'I know, you great big lummox,' Iris chided before looking at Anna who was giggling.

Conversation in the car on the way to the beach, Scarborough to be exact, had been free flowing as Iris asked Anna what she did for a living and about her family. Anna found Iris to be charming, as well as possessing a wicked sense of humour. On numerous occasions, she had apologised for her son's behaviour, assuring Anna she would make sure herself that John lived up to all the promises he had made to her.

The weather was glorious, the sun beating down on the three of them as they began to leave the car park. Holding out both his arms for the ladies to latch on to, both accepted his request as they explored their surroundings.

'Are you going to be able to walk around in all this heat, my dear?' Iris asked as they made their way down to the beach.

'I'll be alright, mam. The heat doesn't affect me as much as it did when I was younger.'

'That's good to know son, but I was addressing Anna.' Iris remarked, causing Anna to start giggling once again. 'Perhaps we could find a pub on the sea front.'

'That sounds nice,' Anna agreed.

* * *

Within a few minutes of walking, they had found a nice bar overlooking the sea. Sitting outside, John was sent inside to fetch some drinks as Anna and Iris sat together, locked in conversation.

'He's a good lad, his heart is in the right place,' Iris commented. 'What happened with Vera, it shook him up. Made him change his whole outlook on life. He's almost back to normal, but he was such a carefree creature in his early years.'

'What did he used to get up to?' Anna asked, intrigued to hear about John's childhood.

'Football, mostly. We lived in Dublin, most of the lads were into the Gaelic football, but not John. He always had to be different. And he'd always manage to get his clothes filthy, no matter what he did.' Iris began to laugh to herself. 'He was always singing. But he was happy, he was my whole world in fact. Still is.'

'John told me his father left when he was in his teens?' Anna said tentatively, Iris nodding in response although not meeting Anna's gaze.

'Yeah. Gordon was his name. Went to work one morning, never came home,' Iris revealed before letting out a small, cynical chuckle. 'Been seeing another woman for the last ten years of our marriage, he had taken me for the fool that I was. It near on destroyed me, I don't know what I would have done without my John. It was he who suggested we needed to break free. So we moved to London, changed our surnames and went on as if he had never existed.'

'Your surnames?' Anna asked, a puzzled look on her face.

'Yes, well mine changed when I divorced my husband. John insisted his did too. He was John Robertson until he turned fourteen.'

Iris's words struck a chord with Anna. She now understood why it was important to John the child's surname was Bates. He was carrying on a name that would no doubt have stopped with John if he hadn't had children of his own. It obviously meant a lot to him if he changed it to completely detach himself from a man who caused himself and his mother so much pain. Besides, Darren would carry the Smith name on.

'But I just wanted to thank you, Anna,' Iris announced, placing her hand over the top of Anna's. 'The hope in John's voice whenever he speaks about you and the baby, well it's been lacking since that shrew of an ex wife of his did what she did. You've given him something to live for, given him back his sparkle and I'll always be grateful to you for that. And also, I'm going to be a grandmother which I never thought would happen.'

'Here we go,' John made himself known as he returned to Anna and his mother carrying three drinks. 'A Coke for the beautiful lady and a cider for my beautiful mam. What have you been talking about?'

'Well, I was about to tell Anna about the time you put on that Bay City Rollers concert for me and friends when you were twelve, but I thought I'd wait until you arrived back. Embarrass you a little.'

* * *

As Anna decided she needed an ice cream, she insisted she leave John and his Mum to catch up a little whilst she went to find a kiosk. John watched as she walked away, a smile on his face as he became lost in his thoughts. Iris noticed, nudging him gently to bring him out of his thoughts.

'She's lovely, isn't she?'

'Yeah,' John agreed. 'She is.'

'Is there something between the two of ye?' Iris questioned, looking at Anna as she became smaller, moving further into the distance.

'What do you mean?' John asked, averting his gaze from Anna and looking at Iris.

'Come on, John. You can't fool me. I've noticed all the little glances, the touches. You never treated Vera that way and you were married to her.'

'Yeah, well we both know now Vera was a mistake,' John replied, sighing deeply. 'Anything you have seen today mam, is because she is carrying my child. We get on well, and we're going to be great friends and support each other in bringing up our child, but nothing more.'

'I just can't help but thinking you've built up these walls after that harlot hurt you As a result, now you feel safe being alone. I just don't want you to miss out on something that could be really good for you. I've lived a lot, John. It's clear to me Anna feels something for you as well.'

'She's far too good for me, Mam. Far too good.'

'It's all excuses, John.' Iris shook her head, John listening intently to his mother's advice. 'I think you've built these walls believing you'd never fall in love again, and are scared because you know, deep down, Anna is more than likely the perfect woman to tear them down.'

'Mam, she is the mother of my child, obviously...'

'More excuses.' Iris interrupted John. 'Maybe it's fate. The baby is fate, it was meant to bring the two of ye together.'

'An extra quid for a flake,' Anna exclaimed, approaching to two of them once more. 'Ridiculous.'

'But you paid it anyway?' John laughed, noting the large chocolate flake perched at the top of her ice cream.

'It's chocolate,' Anna shrugged.

* * *

'I had a great day today,' John said, walking Anna home.

Iris had stayed back at John's, exhausted after their trip to the seaside today, he and Anna choosing to walk to her house after being stuck in traffic on the way home. It seemed natural for Anna to link her arm through John's as they walked. She had never felt so comfortable in a man's company.

'Me too, your mum is a wonderful woman. And she clearly thinks the world of you.'

'Well obviously, I'm great,' John joked as they reached the bottom of Anna's street. 'I meant it when I said you are looking wonderful. Not just today, but in general. Pregnancy really suits you.'

'That's very kind,' Anna replied, running a hand over her stomach. 'Now the sickness seems to have subsided, I have to admit I am enjoying being pregnant. Nearly four months gone, I can't believe it.'

'He or she will be here before we know it. Baby Bates- Smith. Or Smith- Bates if you'd prefer.'

'Oh, I wanted to talk to you about that,' Anna said as they reached her house and walked up the path. They reached the door as Anna continued. 'I spoke to your mum today, about when your Dad left.'

'Yeah.' John said weakly, running a hand through his hair as Anna turned to face him.

'You never told me you changed your surname to Bates. I thought you were born a Bates.'

'Well, it's not something that I choose to think about a lot,' John replied, placing his hands in his pockets.

'Well, it's convinced me that I am carrying a Baby Bates.' Anna announced, John instantly raising his head to look at Anna. 'How can I refuse when you changed your surname is such circumstances? Darren can carry on the Smith name, if he ever gets his life in order, that is.'

'Anna, you have no idea how much that means to me,' John said, his voice shaky as he took Anna's hand in his. 'Thank you.'

He leant forward then, Anna a mere spectator as he pressed his lips to her cheek. As he lingered beside her, Anna shuddered as she felt his warm breath flutter against her cheek. In this moment, she longed to kiss him properly yet as soon as it had began, it was over. John took a couple of steps away from her, slowly letting go of her hand.

'I best get back, to mam.' John said, turning his body away from Anna slightly. 'I'll see you on Tuesday?'

'Yep,' Anna nodded, her voice still weak, John's presence being that close to her still having an effect. 'The cinema.'

'I'll look forward to it.'

John smiled before placing a hand on her stomach. He would sometimes do this, especially if he wasn't going to see Anna for a few days. It melted Anna's heart, the look of sheer joy on John's face as he made as much contact as he could at this early stage with his child.

'Goodnight little one. Be good for mummy.'

With those words, and one last glance at Anna, John began to make his way home.


	5. August

**A/N- I've warbled on in this chapter. I apologise. **

**A few familiar characters pop up. There is one description of a wedding guest (not John and Anna's wedding before you get too excited) I am a little unsure of, you'll know it when you see it but no offence is intended. I didn't know how else to phrase it. **

**I'd like to say thanks to someone for their help on the music in this chapter. They know who they are. And thanks to you all for your reviews, follows and favourites. It means a lot :)**

**Disclaimer:** Nothing Downton related belongs to me but to Julian Fellowes/Carnival/ITV.

* * *

John stood at the back of his Range Rover, considering the space in his boot before looking down to see the suitcase Anna had dragged down the path beside his feet. Scratching his head, John turned to see Anna followed by Mary, the latter carrying a holdall in one hand, and a blue dress covered in plastic on the other arm.

'Okay, so that's everything,' Anna sighed, reaching John.

'Right,' John said, half heartedly moving some things around in his boot. Mary set about opening the back door of the car as John and Anna continued to converse. 'You do know we are only going for two nights?'

'Yes, but a woman must be prepared for every eventuality.' Anna explained, ignorant of Mary busy behind her. She pointed at John's music system. 'Can't you leave that here?'

'Yeah, alright. And how will I sing at this wedding tomorrow night if I do?'

The door slamming shut brought them out of their conversation, Mary wiping her hands together. 'It's a bloody Range Rover, I just put Anna's stuff on the back seat.'

'Well, we could have done that I suppose,' John replied sarcastically, looking down at the now vacant space where Anna's case had been before moving the things in his boot back to their rightful place.

'Bye Mary,' Anna said cheerfully, 'Thanks for your help with the packing.'

'No worries,' Mary answered with a smile as she watched Anna get in the car. Once she had shut the door, Mary turned her attentions to John. 'Oi, before you go.'

John looked behind him before staring back in Mary in disbelief. 'Are you talking to me? I can't believe it is Mary Crawley, brought up to be a polite woman, addressing me like that.'

'Listen, I want you to take care of her. She's a pregnant woman.'

'Yeah,' John said with a light chuckle audible in his tone. 'I had noticed that.'

'She's been very emotional recently, she was crying to me on the phone for an hour the other day because she had forgotten to record The Great British Bake Off.'

'Really?' John grimaced, looking in the direction of where Anna was sitting. 'I'd have been crying more if I had remembered.'

'That aside, she's crying a lot at the moment. And what do weddings do to women?'

'Oh God,' John gasped.

'Exactly, so just keep an eye on her.'

With those words, and a wry smile, Mary walked away as John moved to get in the drivers side of the car. Anna and John were on the way to the wedding of Daisy Robinson, who worked in the same office block as Anna and Gwen. They had become friendly, chatting around the coffee machine situated in the hall, when they should have actually been working. Gossiping in the hall soon turned into nights on the town and the three of them had formed a solid friendship. Daisy was marrying her childhood sweetheart, William. It was Anna who had recommended John to them as the evening's entertainment, and he was also attending as Anna's plus one. John had grown fond of the couple, he and William even planning something special for the reception. The wedding was to be in Edinburgh, where William proposed. Driving up on the Friday evening before, the trip would involve a two night stay. John was quite looking forward to getting away for a while, to be with Anna in surroundings that were unfamiliar to the two of them.

'Right, so road trip CD's,' Anna said excitedly, rifling through her bag before pulling out a black case. 'Is there anything you don't want to listen to?'

'Erm, boybands, eighties power ballads, R n B love songs and anything by Olly Murs or Robbie Williams.'

'Wow, this could be awkward,' Anna laughed, flicking through the CD's she had brought along.

John felt his heart contract as he watched her features brighten, excited to be sharing her musical collection, then her face fall when he dismissed it. She was so beautiful and glowing in the light of her pregnancy, how could he deny her anything?

'Let's have some Robbie then,' John said, putting on his seatbelt before turning on the ignition. 'To kick things off.'

'Oh John.' His head immediately turned to look at her face, she looked overcome with emotion, tears threatening to fall from her eyes. 'That's so kind of you. I don't know what to say.'

Simply smiling in response, turning on the ignition as Anna searched for the right CD, he couldn't help but think Mary was right.

* * *

Now well over the Scottish border, John had decided to talk in a Scottish accent ever since they had left England. Anna had found it amusing at first, however after twenty minutes of 'och ayes' she was ready to ask John to leave her on the side of the motorway and she would hitchhike the rest of the way. The weather was glorious, with it being August and the height of the British summer. John had decided on wearing his sunglasses to shield his eyes from the bright sunshine, and Anna allowed herself in the quieter moments of their journey to reflect on how suave they made him look.

'So, that's all I have of Robbie,' Anna remarked as the first track of the CD began to play once more.

'Oh no, really?' John replied, trying to act disappointed although Anna could tell he was making fun.

'I saw you singing along, don't deny it,' Anna teased as she perused her CD wallet once more.

'Yeah, well I am a wedding singer. _Angels_ is a mainstay of my repertoire,' John argued, looking down as Anna removed another CD. 'Oh no, what are you inflicting on me this time?'

'You're right, why don't you choose what we listen to?' Anna suggested, beginning to look at the discs John had absent-mindedly piled into the side pocket of the door. She couldn't imagine ever leaving her CD's in such a state as she lifted a pile to have a better look at. She held a handful of discs in her hands, none of them in cases. As she shook her head and tutted at his tardiness, John shrugged his shoulders in response. 'Okay, Bonnie Tyler Greatest Hits. You are the father of my child, I can overlook that one.'

'Very gracious of you.'

'The Best Of Billy Ocean, now this one I might not be able to forgive you for.'

'Hey you, get out of my car,' John sang in response, Anna instantly giggling.

'Very witty, Mr Bates.'

'Don't knock Billy, he's a legend. I have been known to move some in my audience to tears with my rendition of _Love Really Hurts Without You._'

'I bet,' Anna raised her eyebrows as she continued to look through John's music collection. 'Oh, here's one. First dance demos.'

'You might want to bypass that one. Just something I offer to clients, how about some U2? It should be beside...'

'No, I'd like to give this a listen if that's alright?' Anna interrupted him, pushing the CD into the player. John nodded, keeping his eyes focussed on the road ahead as the first track began to play.

_'If I had it my way, this would be the first time that you made love, I'd be the first man that your hands touched...' _

'Oh my goodness, John. That's beautiful.'

'Yeah, it was a wedding in America I was asked to do.' John explained, shifting uncomfortably as his singing voice filled the car in the background. 'One of mine and Rob's old soldier friends had moved out there with his American girlfriend. She was a big country fan. You can skip it though, it is a bit saccharine. Sang it as a favour to a friend and all that.'

'No, I like it. I have never listened to you properly. I was three sheets to the wind when I last heard you sing at Gwen's party.'

'Hang on,' John said suspiciously, looking at Anna for a brief moment before looking back at the road. 'You said early on you weren't drunk that night. That my version of _Hungry Eyes _attracted you to me.'

'Oh, I was just avoiding the lecture from Mary about drinking excessively,' Anna replied dismissively, still listening intently to the music. 'It was a lucky guess that you sang _Hungry Eyes_.'

'What?' John exclaimed, quickly jerking the car as it threatened to move over into the next lane, such was his shock at Anna's admission.

'Sssh,' Anna hushed him. 'I'm trying to listen.'

Anna continued to listen to the song, rubbing John's forearm to ease the blow she had just enforced upon him, he smiling broadly before falling back into silence once more.

_'I don't care if I'm your first love, I'd just love to be your last.' _

John heard it first, but had to look more closely to really believe it. Anna was actually crying. Although he was fearing he would be when Mary was warning him before they left, John didn't feel awkward in the slightest. She looked up to meet his gaze, John smiled sympathetically.

'My singing that bad?' John asked, trying to lighten the mood.

'Sorry, I'm so emotional at the moment. Hormones. Your voice is beautiful.'

'Well, I'm very flattered but I wouldn't say it was...'

'I'd love someone to say that to me, that last lyric,' Anna cut John short, sniffling as the song finished. 'About not caring if your someone's first love, but wanting to be their last. It's such a wonderful thought.'

John considered the last line of the song for a moment, inwardly wishing he could be the one to utter those words to Anna. He let out a breath before breaking the silence that had fallen since Anna had last spoken.

'Someone will. One day.'

* * *

On arrival in Edinburgh, John and Anna checked into their hotel near the castle. Deciding to see what the Scottish capital had to offer, they agreed to meet in an hour for a stroll around the beautiful city. Linking her arm through John's as they walked, she was an eager listener as John explained about his Scottish roots and shared the albeit little knowledge he knew about the castle.

Finding a restaurant that served steaks, as Anna was finding was normal practice when out with John, they shared dinner and stories of weddings that they had been invited to in the past. John's heart ached as Anna said she was destined to always be the bridesmaid, never the bride. Anna laughed hysterically as John revealed the most embarrassing moment of his singing career so far. Although singing 'Puppy Love' would have been humiliating as it was, singing it dressed as Scooby Doo was excruciating. John needed the money, the bride and groom were from another planet it seemed. He believed the couple were divorced now, he didn't hold many sympathies with them.

After dinner, Anna felt a little tired, and considering the long day that lay ahead of them, John suggested they retire to their rooms for the evening.

'I've had a wonderful evening, and afternoon travelling up here actually,' Anna admitted as their hotel came into view.

'Me too,' John agreed with a smile, opening the hotel door open for Anna to pass through. 'Although I am only just coming to terms with you revealing you were drunk that night.'

Anna didn't respond at first as they entered the lift, instead wearing a grin as they made their way to the third floor, where their rooms were situated.

'If I tell you something now,' Anna began, stepping out of the lift, 'will you promise not to laugh at me?'

'I give you my word,' John replied as they began to walk the long corridor, their rooms at the very end.

'I'm ashamed at this, and please don't get offended.'

'Right...' John arched an eyebrow suspiciously.

'That night we did the twenty questions thing at my place, I wasn't avoiding a rant from Mary when I said what I did about _Hungry Eyes_.' Anna took a deep breath before continuing. 'I just said that to you earlier because I didn't want to admit the truth. I feel such a fool now, but I said that to avoid her belittling me. You know what she's like. She knows how much I like the song, and the excuse I used would have been plausible in her eyes, and it was.'

'Why would she have belittled you if you told the truth?' John asked, furrowing his brow as they reached Anna's room.

'Because, the truth is, that night, watching you sing, I fancied the pants off you.'

John laughed out loud at her statement, relief flowing through Anna's veins watching his body shaking with his laughter.

'Don't worry, if I were Mary I would have belittled you as well.'

'You're very dashing you know,' Anna said, making sure she had his gaze upon her as she did so.

'Thank you,' John was blushing, Anna had never felt as attracted to him as she did at this moment, watching the effect her words were having on him. 'Thank you for being honest. It's very flattering. But you don't fancy me now?'

'Oh God no,' Anna said quickly, maybe too over convincingly. She was lying through her teeth, but she didn't want John to know that.

'Good,' John lied. 'Because that would make things much more complicated.'

'Indeed,' Anna answered because she felt the right thing to do was agree. In truth, if they were together, to raise their child properly side by side, things would be a whole lot easier. She wouldn't have to live each day bottling her feelings deep inside. It was killing her, and evidently John didn't have a clue.

'Anyway, shall we meet out here tomorrow morning, say ten?'

'Perfect,' Anna nodded in response.

'I'll say goodnight then,' John took Anna by surprise by placing a kiss on her cheek, it taking all the self restraint she could muster not to turn her head and crush her lips against his. Then she felt his hand on her stomach, and she really was done for if they didn't part for the evening now. 'Goodnight little one.'

With one final exchanged smile, John backed away and turned to his door. Anna stood, frozen as she watched him unlock the door and disappear into his room.

* * *

Looking out of the window that overlooked the city, standing with his hands in his pockets, John waited patiently for Anna in the corridor outside their rooms. It was already ten past ten, however John knew too well from experience not to hurry a woman when she was getting ready, especially when she was getting ready to go to go to a wedding. He knew Anna was awake, she had text him earlier to ask if he would mind swapping the cereal in his breakfast basket the hotel had offered as room service once she knew he had Frosties. Meeting in the corridor, she smiled as she held out the All Bran to him, that the hotel had given her. They had never seen each other in such a state of undress since _that _night. Anna's hair was tied up, she was wearing Sesame Street pyjama's which amused John somewhat, yet she still managed to look stunning. Heaven help him if what she wore to bed left him breathless, how was her appearance later on going to leave him feeling?

He had initially been a little put out Anna had lied to him over the real reasons why she had invited him to share her bed. However, John had to admit hearing that Anna had been attracted to him that night for him and not just his singing voice was extremely flattering. It was a little hard to hear it was a passing fancy, but John only blamed himself. He had never intended to see Anna again and if it wasn't for the baby he never would have. If he had been a better man, he would have noticed what a wonderful woman Anna was from the start. He wouldn't have left that morning, he would have stayed to talk to Anna, to get to know her. His fears always kept getting in the way, the blockade he had built up as a result of his failed marriage seemingly impossible to break down.

When all was said and done, John thanked whatever power was responsible that he and Anna seemed to have a strong relationship, a real friendship, and he had no doubts whatever that they would work wonderfully together to bring up their child.

Looking down, John scrutinised his appearance once more. With it being the height of Summer, he hadn't bought a blazer with him. Early on, he had decided on wearing just a waistcoat, white shirt and trousers, although he wasn't sure about the colour he had chosen. Or rather Cora had chosen. He had never worn anything but grey, navy blue or black to a wedding. Tan. That's what the shop assistant had called it. Beige, was John's assumption, backed up by Robert who stood by, looking on amusedly at John's little fashion show. The outfit was completed by a chocolate coloured tie, brown in John and Robert's language. Both Cora and the lady who had assisted him agreed the light colour made him look twenty years younger.

'So I only look about ten?' John had joked.

'Fifty I'd say,' Robert quipped back, earning a hard stare from his best friend.

He still wasn't sure about the brown shoes, however the clicking of a door behind him brought John out of his inward self deprecation. Turning to look over his shoulder, all thoughts of his own appearance were driven to the inner recesses of his brain as he took in the vision before him. Anna was shutting the door behind her, still not looking at him as she locked it. As he turned to fully face her, John was sure he had never seen a woman looking as beautiful as Anna did in that moment. She had curled her hair, allowing it to flow freely down over her shoulders. Her dress was floaty, the best word John could find in his masculine dictionary to describe it, a deep blue that John realised as her gaze met his, made her light blue eyes really stand out. And when there eyes met, John was dumbfounded. She was smiling brightly, the only response John had was to smile back. He was relieved Anna spoke first, formulating a sentence right now would prove rather embarrassing.

'Good morning. I love what you're wearing, tan really suits you. And I like the chocolate tie.'

'Thank you,' John replied, wondering if Anna had spoken to Cora about his outfit or if women really did have a knowledge of different colours to those that men knew. He stepped closer to Anna then, reaching down to take her hand in his. Anna was taken aback by his gesture, taking a deep breath as she waited to hear what he would say next. 'Forgive me, I've never been good at putting into words what's going on in my head, but you look absolutely gorgeous today.'

'Thank you,' Anna blushed a little, John unable to take his eyes away from her. 'Shall we get moving? The wedding starts at eleven.'

* * *

As they arrived at the church, the groom and his best man were outside greeting guests. The church was beautiful, Anna could only dream of ever getting married in such a place. John had a different outlook, it only served to remind him of the day he had married Vera, and in turn of how their marriage deteriorated. However, one look down at Anna staring in wonderment, taking in her surroundings was enough to banish such thoughts. Being almost half way through her pregnancy, she really was beginning to show. John truly believed it was the most stunning sight he had ever seen.

'You're really showing in that dress,' John whispered as he and Anna edged closer to William.

'God, don't remind me.' Anna sighed, moving to place a hand on her stomach.

'I think it's wonderful,' John admitted truthfully, Anna stopping to look up at him. John stopped too, staring back at her with all the sincerity he could.

'Thank you,' Anna smiled before looking around at the gathered guests. 'But a thought occurred to me last night and it's been playing on my mind ever since.'

'Really? Go on...'

'Anna, you look beautiful.' Both turned to see Gwen approaching them, followed by her boyfriend, Evelyn. Throwing her arms around Anna, they shared an embrace as John and Evelyn stood awkwardly beside them. 'You remember Evelyn.'

John had to stifle a laugh, it had always amused him, somewhat immaturely that here was this good looking young man, an electrician by trade, who shared a name with one of John's many Aunts. Out of sight, Anna dug her elbow into his ribs before she greeted Evelyn with a kiss on the cheek.

'And John, how are you?' Evelyn asked, offering John his hand. 'We are very much looking forward to hearing your performance tonight.'

'Thank you, I am very well.'

'And how is the pregnancy coming along?' Evelyn turned his attentions back to Anna. 'How far gone are you now?'

'Almost five months, it's just flown,' Anna was beaming as she spoke.

'Going to be awkward today though,' Gwen said under her breath. 'Explaining how John is the father yet you aren't actually together.'

'Which is what I was about to say to you before Gwen came over,' Anna announced, looking up at John who was shifting from foot to foot. A smirk overtook his lips as an idea played around his mind. 'What are you thinking?'

'We just tell people we are married.'

'Don't be silly,' Anna dismissed his suggestion with a laugh.

'Why? The only people who know the truth are Gwen and Evelyn.' John pointed out, looking at Gwen before turning his attentions to the groom. 'And Daisy and William, but there'll be too busy to take notice of what we do today.'

'We can't...'

'Will it be difficult to pretend you are in love with me then?' John asked as Anna rebuked his suggestion. 'It certainly won't be for me. Not with the way you look today.'

John and Anna stared at each other as Gwen made to move past them, dragging Evelyn along with her. 'Come on, darling, William is going in now. We'll just leave Mr and Mrs Bates here and go and get a prime position in the church to see Daisy walking up the aisle.'

'We haven't got rings,' Anna offered weakly.

'Simple. I followed Prince William's example and don't wear a ring, your fingers are swollen due to the pregnancy.'

As they began to walk once more, following Gwen and Evelyn, Anna agreed. 'Alright, but you do all the talking if anyone asks about it.'

'Fine,' John nodded, holding his hand out to Anna who wrapped her fingers around his without missing a beat. Hand in hand, they made their way into the church.

* * *

Daisy was the beautiful bride, it was clear for all to see how in love she and William were as they exchanged their vows. John and Anna sat behind Evelyn and Gwen, looking on intently as the bride and groom promised their lives to each other. Their hands had remained locked together ever since John had first offered his to Anna, it seeming natural to continue that way as they sat beside each other.

Their hands remained together, walking back to the car to make their way to the reception. They spoke about the wedding, Anna cooing about Daisy's dress and how she and William were made for each other. John admitted he agreed, he had never been to a wedding before where the two people getting married seemed so well suited.

Once at the reception at a nearby hotel, John and Anna studied the seating chart to see where they were sitting. John was secretly pleased he and Anna were on a different table to Evelyn and Gwen. Evelyn met Gwen through William, so he knew more people at the wedding than Gwen did. They had been seated with some of his and William's mutual friends. Although John was fond of the two of them, he found weaving a tale without Gwen and Evelyn listening as well would be much easier.

On their table were an older couple, two men who John presumed were also together, and a very well dressed black man with a young blonde lady who took an immediate interest in Anna in her state. They all stood as John and Anna approached.

'Oh my goodness, you're pregnant,' the young lady squealed, clearly already making good use of the free wine John guessed, before her next statement confirmed his suspicions. 'So you won't be drinking then?'

'Erm, no.' Anna answered, looking up at John who was wearing that smirk that sent her pulse racing. 'This is my husband John.'

'You're the father I hope,' the young lady laughed out loud, finding herself extremely funny although no one else seemed to be seeing the situation quite as amusing.

'Yes, I'm the Dad,' John replied patiently.

'My name is Rose, and this is my boyfriend Jack.' Rose placed a hand on Jack's chest before turning to Anna, her voice barely a whisper. 'He's American.'

'Really?' Anna was also whispering, although she wasn't sure why. 'John's Irish.'

'It's amazing isn't it?' Rose was shaking her head. 'How both our partners aren't English.'

'Baffling,' Anna agreed in jest before feeling John's body shaking with laughter beside her.

John and Anna introduced themselves to the others on the table as dinner was served. The older couple were called Charles and Elsie. Anna listened intently as they explained the way they had got together. Childhood sweethearts, they lost contact and married other people. Never far from each other's thoughts, Charles got back in contact when his wife had died. Elsie had long since divorced her husband, it seemed Charlie had been the only man she had ever truly loved. That was ten years ago, and here they were enjoying their twilight years in each other's company. The two gentleman were indeed together, Thomas and Jimmy. From first impressions, John deemed Thomas to be extremely arrogant, especially as he described his job as a male model.

It was in times like these that he admired Anna and the way that she was and wished he could be a little more like her. She was so patient, so polite and seemed to be able to strike up a conversation with anyone, even someone as stuck up as Thomas. She seemed genuinely interested as Elsie described her life with Charles, and as Jack described his as a jazz musician. She was even able to tolerate Rose's exuberant personality.

When it came to talking about themselves, John started on the path of truth. He explained Anna and he had shared a one night stand, Elsie nodding and saying we've all had those, Rose agreeing eagerly as well. That was as far as the truth went, however. He managed to create a story so romantic even Jane Austen would have been proud. He explained how ever since that night he hadn't been able to get Anna out of his mind, how she consumed his every waking thought. Thomas guffawed as John continued, explaining how he tracked Anna down and wooed her how a woman as wonderful and perfect as her should be. He finally 'got the girl' by singing on her front lawn beneath her bedroom window, the stars shining in the sky as he belted out her favourite song for the whole street to hear. That was a year ago and here they were, newlyweds awaiting the birth of their first child. Anna had to admit to herself it was a wonderful tale, one she desperately wished was true.

Spending the afternoon sharing deft touches, pretending to be together felt wonderful, although each wouldn't admit that to the other. No one suspected, because it was genuine. The way Anna and John were behaving towards each other wasn't a lie, it was how they truly felt.

As the afternoon grew older, the room was transformed for the evening reception. Tables were moved to the side of the room, a dance floor was created. John left Anna with Gwen and Evelyn at their table at the front, whilst he set about setting up the equipment he would be using for his set. Evelyn had gone to get a round of drinks, leaving the two women alone.

'You too seemed very cosy,' Gwen remarked as she watched John reading through his set list intently.

'Well, we had to make it look convincing,' Anna replied, smiling as thoughts of the afternoon she had shared with John flooded her memory.

'Hmmm,' Gwen said sceptically, raising an eyebrow. 'Sure there isn't more there?'

Anna didn't answer, inwardly relieved as Daisy approached them. 'Hello ladies, how are we?'

'We are fine,' Anna replied, standing up to embrace her friend. 'You looked stunning today. Have you enjoyed it?'

'Yes, it's been wonderful,' Daisy turned to look at William, who was chatting to Evelyn at the bar. 'But enough about me. You never told me you and John were together.'

'What?'

Before Daisy had a chance to explain, John was announcing the first dance.

'Good evening ladies and gentlemen.' John began, straightening out the cord his microphone was connected to as he spoke. 'My name is John Bates, and I shall be the evenings entertainment. Please, don't try to sound too excited. Firstly, a bit of housekeeping.' John gently kicked an open suitcase in front of him to indicate what he was talking about, the case which had held his music system was now home to a few CD's and flyers with his face upon them. 'There are some demo discs down here, try not to let my face on them put you off. Please, if you like what you hear then recommend me to family and friends. I'm about to become a father so need all the money I can get.' A few cheers, wolf whistles and clapping went up around the room, John raising his hand in acknowledgment. 'I know. A woman actually found me attractive enough to share her bed with me. Amazing isn't it?' The laughter was more prominent now as John turned his gaze to Anna, who he was relieved to see was smiling. 'Now, enough about me. The real reason we are here is to celebrate the marriage of William and Daisy, and I'm sure you'd all agree with me when I say after seeing them together, how perfect they are for each other. So without any further ado, I'd like to invite the bride and groom onto the dance floor, for their first dance. Ladies and gentlemen, Mr and Mrs Mason.'

John had never sung the song he was about to sing, and admitted to feeling a little nervous as the happy couple approached him, all smiles as their guests cheered them on. He wasn't entirely sure his voice, akin to those possessed by the likes of Bryan Adams or Jon Bon Jovi would suit this particular song, but it was Daisy who had begged him to sing it. Even John couldn't deny the wishes of a bride on her wedding day. Taking a deep breath, he pressed play. William and Daisy took up their positions and John waited for his time to begin.

_'Oh, her eyes, her eyes, make the stars look like they aren't shining ...'_

A ripple of applause went up around the room as John sang the modern classic in his own style, Daisy and William wrapped up in each other. He was too busy trying to sing the right words to chance a look at Anna. She was entranced watching as John sang every note as if his life depended on it, desperate to get it right for the couple dancing in front of him.

_'When I see your face, there's not a thing that I would change...'_

'He's quite good, isn't he?' Evelyn remarked as he joined the girls back at their table. 'Not sure about the song though. That Hugo Mars is overrated, wouldn't you say?'

'Bruno,' Gwen corrected Evelyn, not averting her gaze from Anna as she looked at John intently.

'What?' Evelyn asked, taking a sip from his drink.

'It's Bruno Mars, isn't it Anna?' Gwen tapped Anna on the back, but she still seemed to be in a world of her own, watching as John began the final chorus. 'Anna.'

'Yes?' Anna snapped, looking back over her shoulder to be greeted with a look of shock on Gwen's face. 'Sorry sweetie, I was just listening to John.'

'Don't worry,' Gwen replied, raising her eyebrow and smirking slightly. 'I'll talk to you when he's finished.

Anna turned back to look at John without another word, surprised to see him looking in her direction as he finished the song, his gaze firmly upon her. The lyrics he was singing, it was as if he was singing them directly to her and Anna had never felt more alive in her whole life.

_'When you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while, 'cos girl you're amazing, just the way you are.' _

The room began to applaud the happy couple as they finished their first dance with a kiss, however it was if they were the only people in the room to John as he continued to look at Anna. Something was happening between them, he wasn't a fool. He had experienced enough in life to know. He also knew he had never felt this way about anyone before. However, it seemed whenever he admitted his feelings to himself, an overwhelming feeling of fear took hold. To John, falling in love was only ever followed by pain. And he wasn't sure he could go through that again. Shaking himself out of his silent musing, John suddenly realised a state of dead air had fallen over proceedings.

'Thanks so much, John,' Daisy said, placing a hand on his wrist. John bent down, his position on the stage making it a little difficult to have a conversation. 'It was beautiful.'

'Thank you for the rousing vote of confidence,' John replied with a smirk. 'Are you still sure about this next song?'

'Yes,' William said with a nod. 'Now the first dance is out of the way, it's time to let our hair down a bit.'

'Fantastic. You guys really know how to a challenge a man. You better get up here and join me then, William.'

'What's going on?' Daisy asked as she watched William jump up onstage.

John stood back up, ready to address the gathered guests, but not before looking back over at Anna, who was joining the rest of the congregation in their clapping. She sent him a little inconspicuous wave, he responding with a smile and a nod of the head.

'Ladies and Gentlemen, your bride and groom there. And I am delighted to be joined by William. Now, I might be able to sing a little bit, but I can't rap to save my life. So, the main man here today is going to help me out. We've only rehearsed this a couple of times, so bear with us. Here we go.'

The dance floor filled as John set about finding the backing track for his next song. Laughter filled the room as the familiar introduction began to play. John and William were both now wearing sunglasses, William going that step further and wearing a baseball cap backwards. William and John stood back to back as the latter sang the opening line.

_'I gotta feeling, that tonight's gonna be a good night...' _

* * *

'Come on, John,' Anna whined as he loaded the car with their luggage. 'I drove a minibus once. We only nearly hit that tree...'

'Right,' John replied, shutting the boot. 'And that's supposed to convince me? This isn't a minibus, it's a top of the range, err... Range Rover.'

'I know, and I want a go,' she pleaded, almost begging him now. 'You can trust me. You trust me with carrying your child, you can trust me with driving your car.'

John grimaced as he tried to work out Anna's twisted logic. In one way, she had a point, in another it made no sense at all. He couldn't carry his own child. Her eyes were big and beautiful as she looked up at him, what harm could it really do?

'Oh alright,' John relented, reluctantly handing her the keys. As soon as the metal touched her hands Anna was racing to the drivers side of the car. John weakly called after her. 'But only until we stop for some lunch in Carlisle.'

As he got into the car, John put on his seatbelt and winced as Anna set about becoming accustomed to her surroundings. She heaved the seat forward to her driving position and adjusted the mirror with a yank.

'All settled?' John asked, a sarcastic lilt to his tone as he folded his arms. 'Just to warn you, I'm a terrible passenger.'

'Well, I'm an equally bad driver,' Anna replied with a wink, turning on the ignition. 'This will be an adventure for the two of us.'

The night before had been a triumph. John's set had been well received, and he loved how interactive the crowd had been. After his and William's Black Eyed Peas tribute act, John kept up the pace with a medley of wedding reception favourites such as YMCA and Celebration. It was then the bride's turn, joining John on stage with her bridesmaids for an energetic version of _Single Ladies _by Beyonce. It was one song John thought he would never sing, but he had to admit he was having a great time as Daisy accompanied him on vocals and the lovely ladies she had picked to be her bridesmaids danced around them as they sang. He really enjoyed gigs like that, where everyone felt like they could get involved. With the set list being chosen by the Bride and Groom, the songs were more modern than John was used to. However, as the night grew older, John was able to slip in a few wedding staples, songs such as _Wonderful Tonight _and _Have I Told You Lately_. William and Daisy left the reception to John's rendition of _Can You Feel The Love Tonight, _another choice of the Bride, seemingly a Disney fan although Elton John was more John's genre.

'You were great last night,' Anna remarked, swinging the 4x4 around a tight roundabout in a blasé fashion.

'Easy on the clutch,' John advised before continuing. 'Yeah, it was a good evening. Their song choices were quite challenging. I've had a few weeks to prepare, but you never know how it's going to go until the evening.'

'Well, you never would have guessed you had only sung some of those songs once or twice,' Anna replied as she entered the motorway with a jerk of the steering wheel. 'I think Sexyback was my favourite.'

'I can't believe they got me to sing that,' John said as he looked in Anna's blind spot before the rear view mirror. 'You can move across when you're ready.'

'Did you never want to be a pop star when you were younger?' Anna asked, choosing to completely ignore John's instruction. 'You're better than you give yourself credit for.'

'Not really,' John shrugged, still observing all the mirrors intently. 'I never had the opportunity, there was never anything like The X Factor in those days. I was intent on joining the army pretty much as soon as I turned sixteen. Don't get too close to the car in front.'

Anna sighed deeply, her patience being tested by John's constant advisory remarks, before continuing her line of questioning. 'And what about now?'

'No, I'm quite happy as I am. I've never had a desire to work in the music industry. I enjoy what I do well enough.' He stopped to point at a sign, talking rather too eagerly for Anna's liking. 'We're only twenty three miles from our services.'

'Don't sound too relieved, will you?'

* * *

The journey back home took less time than John had anticipated, probably due to Anna's insistence on travelling a few miles over the speed limit on her leg of the journey. After carrying her luggage inside, and staying for a coffee, John was making his excuses, having to fulfil his promise of joining Robert for a pool tournament at their local pub.

'Can you play pool?' Anna asked as they stood on her doorstep.

'Nope, but Robert's regular partner has had to go down south unexpectedly so I was drafted in.'

'You know, my five month scan is coming up in a couple of weeks.' Anna reminded John, before releasing a small chuckle. 'I can't believe how quickly it's all going.'

'It really is,' John agreed. 'Before we know it the little one will be with us.'

'They sure will.'

Silence fell between them, before John remembered another piece of information he had neglected to tell Anna until now.

'I am going down to London, to see my Mum the week before the scan.'

'Oh,' Anna said weakly. not thrilled at the prospect of John being away. 'How long for?'

'Three nights. Look, tell me if I am being incredibly forward, but would you like to join me? You know, if you can get the time off...'

'I'd love to,' Anna replied, John laughing slightly at her enthusiasm.

'We can talk about it on Tuesday. Where are we going for our bonding session this week?'

'The cinema? That new Zac Efron film is out.'

'Great, so I get to sit there whilst you drool over that pipsqueak and his impossible good looks and charm.'

'Don't worry, I'm sure his leading lady will be impossibly good looking too. They usually are.'

'Right, and talking about impossibly good looking women, I can't leave you without saying again how beautiful you looked yesterday.;

'You too,' Anna replied before clarifying. 'I mean, you looked really handsome yesterday.'

'Thank you,' John blushed, pulling at the collar of his shirt a little. 'I'll say goodbye then, or I'll have Robert beating me with a pool cue.'

'We can't have that.'

'No.'

As had seemed to happen a million times that weekend, Anna and John's gaze locked, both smiling as they drank the other in. With a deep breath, John broke the eye contact and turned to walk down the path.

'Good luck,' Anna called after him. 'With the pool.'

'Thanks,' John replied, stopping halfway down the path to look at Anna. 'See you Tuesday.'

**A/N 2- Anyone else wishing these two would just get it awwwn?**


	6. September

**A/N - After last weeks episode, I hope this chapter provides some respite. **

**For those who ask, I don't have a Twitter account or a Tumblr one to that end. (What is Tumblr?) Maybe I should create one? **

**Disclaimer:** Downton Abbey belongs to Julian Fellowes/ITV/Carnival.

* * *

September arrived, Anna now more than half way through her pregnancy. She was granted some time off work, choosing to join John on his trip down south from Yorkshire to visit his mother in London. The drive down was filled with more of Anna's compilation CD's, arguments over who would actually drive and Anna's occasional emotional outbursts. When stopping unexpectedly at a supermarket to feed Anna's current craving, John had to bite on his lip to avoid a smile overtaking his features. Anna was moved to tears by someone offering them their car parking ticket which still had forty five minutes to run.

'It just proves all is not lost in this big bad world,' she wailed as John gratefully accepted the ticket and displayed it on his dashboard.

John and Anna arrived at Iris's home in Ealing just in time for dinner. On their first night in the capital, Iris insisted she cook them John's favourite meal as a boy, his mother's beef stew with dumplings. Anna was a happy observer as she ate, listening to the banter between a mother and her son. It was clear they were close and how much John adored his mum. They shared the same traits, both flailed with their hands when they spoke, both wore the same smirk when they found something amusing.

Anna had openly admitted to herself she was in love with him. She had never felt this way about a man before, when she wasn't with John it felt as though something was missing. The times they were in each other's company passed all too quickly. She longed to tell him, but was afraid it would ruin what they already had between them. Sometimes she would believe he felt the same, the way he looked at her on occasions made Anna feel like she could hardly breathe. But he'd always make a comment, or a remark about their arrangements after the baby was born and all her hopes were dashed. If she couldn't have him as her boyfriend, she sure as hell didn't want to lose him as a friend.

The truth was, John did feel the same. He just wouldn't allow himself to go that way. His failed divorce and marriage had left him shattered, fearful of committing himself to just one person again. It seemed ridiculous- they were pledging to raise a child together- yet John just didn't want to open himself up in that way again. He had convinced himself, the way his past relationships had gone, it must be him with the problem. Something he does, a character trait that drives people away. He couldn't bear that to happen with Anna.

Iris allowed John and Anna some time alone for John to show her what London had to offer. She insisted she would only slow them down, with it being John's intention to show Anna all the sights. Anna argued she was five months pregnant, yet John could read an ulterior motive behind his mother's reluctance to join them. She was blunt in her explanations to her son.

'I'm just giving the two of ye the time to realise you love each other,' she explained as she sat with John in the living room.

'Mam,' John shushed his mother, kicking the door shut from where he was in the armchair despite Anna having gone up an hour or so previously. 'There is nothing going on between the two of us. Not like that anyway.'

'Yeah, right,' Iris rolled her eyes before standing up, seemingly none to convinced. 'I'm going up. What time are you two leaving?'

'I want to get the half ten to Waterloo,' John explained with a sigh. 'Going to bed are you?'

'Yes, I have a day out with my ladies son,' Iris explained. 'We are going to Windsor for the day, the minibus will be here to pick my up at nine.'

'Right,' John raised a sceptical eyebrow in his mother's direction. 'So you were also lying about wanting to slow down in your dotage?'

'What? I would slow the two of you down. Tomorrow, I'll be out with seven other women my own age. We are all as slow as each other.'

Embarking on their trip together the following morning, John was entranced by Anna's excitement at being shown around London. She had never been before, not as a sightseer anyway, and she couldn't wait. The conversation never waned as they made their way to Waterloo, John keen to find out where Anna wanted to go. Arriving around midday, Anna's first port of call was lunch.

'Where do you want to eat?' John asked as they emerged from the underground at Piccadilly Circus, the light making him wince slightly as they reached the pavement. 'Italian? I'm sure there's a steak house near here...'

'I could murder a Big Mac,' Anna interrupted John mid flow, resting a hand on her stomach as she took in her surroundings. 'And a strawberry milkshake come to that.'

'Alright,' John chuckled, guiding Anna away from the oncoming flow of pedestrians. 'If you follow me I believe there is a McDonalds this way.'

Anna gripped onto John's arm as he began to move, the small gesture causing John's breath to catch in his throat. He looked down at her as she adjusted her top, an action John had learnt Anna performed to try and hide her baby bump.

'I don't know why you do that, you know,' John remarked as they settled in a steady walk towards their destination.

'I don't want to look fat,' Anna said in response, tightening her grip on his arm as they manoeuvred their way through a group of tourists who seemed more enamoured with the M&M World opposite than actually looking where they were going.

'You aren't fat Anna, you're pregnant. And you just get more beautiful every day.'

There it was again. One of those comments that convinced Anna that John felt the same way she did. He followed it with that smirk, the one that Anna was sure if it was the last sight she ever saw, she would leave this world happily. She met his eyes, grinning herself before they continued on in silence.

Walking inside the restaurant, they were both relieved to find it relatively empty, a table for two caught John's eye and he allowed Anna to sit before bracing himself for her order. She had become very meticulous in what she wanted to eat recently and John knew to listen intently.

'Right, I'll have a Big Mac meal with a strawberry milkshake.'

'Okay,' John nodded, waiting for Anna to continue before realising she was remaining silent. Thinking he had got away relatively easily, he cast her a sceptical glance before turning to walk towards the counter. As soon as he had, he felt her hand on his wrist.

'Hang on.'

'Here we go,' John said under his breath.

'No gherkins. Or onions.'

'Right, no smelly stuff then?'

'Or cheese,' Anna continued, turning her nose up. 'Do you think they'll do a Big Mac without cheese?'

'Probably not.' John shook his head, taking Anna's concerns very seriously. 'Why don't you get the Big Mac, and I'll eat everything you pick out?'

'Oh no, it will tainted with the taste of those things and I'll be sick.' Anna began to tap her chin with her index finger as she thought what she wanted to eat. Sighing deeply, John rolled his eyes as he watched the queue grow ever bigger. 'All I want is a plain burger.'

'So why don't I get you a plain hamburger with nothing in it but the burger?'

'But it won't be enough. I am eating for two.'

'I'll buy you two?' John suggested. 'And a large fries.'

'Perfect.' Anna finally said, reaching into her bag. 'How much do you want?'

'Don't be silly, this is on me,' John replied with a wink before making his way to join the back of the queue, which was now twice the size of what it was before Anna's confusion over what to eat.

Rejoining Anna at the table, John looked on amusedly as she began to dig into the chips before he had even sat down.

'Two plain hamburgers, madame.' John said in a french accent, Anna laughing in response before reaching for one of them. 'Would madame like to sample the milkshake?'

'Thank you, monsieur,' Anna replied before locking her gaze on what John had chosen to eat. 'A chicken sandwich?'

'Yeah, you put me off a Big Mac,' John answered as he opened a little tub of ketchup. She was still staring at his food, licking her lips as John opened the box the chicken sandwich came in. As he lifted the burger to his lips, he could see Anna was watching his every move. Before taking a bite, he met Anna's gaze. 'Do you want this?'

'God yes,' Anna answered without missing a beat, John laughing softly as he passed the burger across to her, she gathering it hungrily in her grasp. 'Do you mind?'

'No, I'll just have your burgers,' John began to unwrap one of them but stopped suddenly. He was sure he could hear the slightest of whimpers escaping Anna. He sat back in his chair. 'You still want the burgers too?'

Anna nodded her head coyly as John rose to his feet. 'Where are you going?'

'To buy myself another chicken sandwich,' John replied, making to walk past her.

'Oh, at least let me buy it for you.' Anna insisted reaching for her bag.

'It's fine, honestly. But you should feel honoured. There aren't many I'd gladly let take food away from me.'

Once lunch was eaten, Anna decided she wanted to embark on the shops. Although not his favourite past time, John enjoyed the hustle and bustle of Regents Street and Oxford Street and of course, Anna's company. As was the change in both their circumstances, John followed Anna wilfully into a branch of Mothercare. John was an enthusiastic listener as Anna explained she wanted the walls in the baby's room to be yellow, a colour he agreed was suitable whatever the baby turned out to be. John became suspicious as Anna lead him to different parts of the store, instantly finding the furniture she wanted without much effort.

'I may have visited with Mary one time or another...' Anna answered as she leant against her choice of cot for the baby. 'You don't mind, do you?'

'Not at all,' John smiled. 'But do I get a say in anything?'

'Erm... you can put the furniture up if you want?'

'Right,' John raised his eyebrows. 'Lucky me.'

Anna bit her lip. 'You don't mind do you?'

'Whatever makes you happy, sweetheart, is fine by me.'

Choosing to take yet another term of endearment with a pinch of salt, for her own sanity if nothing else, Anna lead John back out to the street. John had to call surrender as they reached Regents Street and Anna wanted to look in yet another clothes shop.

'You go in here, I'm on my mobile. Call me when you're done.'

'Are you sure?' Anna asked, rubbing his forearm lightly.

'Yes, enjoy yourself.'

With a glance over her shoulder, Anna disappeared into the crowd of people inside the store and looked around. He smiled as he saw Hamley's in the distance.

'Perfect,' he said to himself as he strode purposefully in its direction.

Half an hour or so passed before John felt his phone vibrate in his pocket as he reached the street once again. Clutching a Hamley's bag in his hand, he answered his phone.

'Hello Anna.' As he turned around, he saw Anna walking towards him, phone to her ear.

'I guess I can hang up,' she replied with a chuckle. 'I saw Hamley's and had an inkling this might be where you are. What have you been buying?'

'Why don't we find somewhere to have a drink...'

'And a cake?' Anna interrupted, her face gleaming.

'Alright, and a cake and I'll show you.'

Finding a small coffee shop just off Regents Street, John and Anna sat down to a blueberry muffin and in Anna's case, a banana smoothie.

'This is fantastic,' she enthused as she took a bite from her muffin. 'Aren't you going to eat yours?'

'Oh no, I've learnt now. This one is also for you.'

'Thanks,' Anna blushed, wiping her mouth with a napkin before her attention was caught by the bag by John's feet. 'So, are you going to show me what you bought then?'

John looked in the direction of Anna's gaze, taking the bag in his grasp. His tone was teasing. 'It's not for you.'

'I know that,' Anna sniped back before taking another bite of her muffin as John reached inside the bag for what he had purchased. Anna gasped as John revealed a fluffy brown teddy bear, complete with a big yellow bow tied around his neck.

'He's called Pudding,' John said with a smile, looking at the bear before turning back to look at Anna. 'I chose him because I know how much you like your puddings at the moment. Plus, he has a yellow bow, to match the babies room. I wanted some input, you see.'

'It's for the baby?' Anna gasped, her overwhelmed reaction confusing John somewhat.

'Yeah,' John furrowed his brow, the lightest smile playing on his lips. 'Who else would it be for?'

'Sorry, it's just you are the first person to buy anything for the baby.'

'Well, it's fitting I'm the kid's father then, isn't it?'

'Yes,' Anna agreed. 'It is.'

After answering John's pleas, Anna agreed she had looked in enough shops. John turned tour guide as he showed his guest Leicester Square, Buckingham Palace and Trafalgar Square. As the day had now turned into evening, John suggested dinner before heading back to Waterloo for their train home. Walking along the South Bank, the illuminated London Eye reflecting on the Thames, both John and Anna agreed they couldn't remember the last time they had enjoyed a day out so much.

Reaching Iris's home just after ten, they both immediately quietened down their rather lively debate about who had been the most successful X Factor act upon noticing the house in darkness.

'Mam's in bed,' John whispered as they began to tread the garden path. 'We all know it was Leona by the way.'

'No way, Olly Murs.' Anna replied indignantly.

John looked back over his shoulder, his face displaying an extremely amused expression. 'Alright, someone's a little touchy aren't they?'

'Yes, when it comes to my Olly,' Anna replied, following John into the house. 'Thank you for a wonderful day, John. I really had a great time.'

'As did I. It was a brilliant day.' John agreed.

'And thanks, for the teddy,' Anna added, lifting the Hamley's bag she was now holding. 'It will be the first thing I put in the cot, ready for the baby. Once you've built it, of course.'

'Naturally.' John watched as Anna mounted the first stair before placing his hand over hers which was clutching the banister.. 'Erm, Anna. Before you go.'

'Yes,' Anna said breathlessly, stilling her movements to look at John. He removed his hand from hers before reaching inside his pocket to reveal a small pink rabbit.

'I hope you don't think me incredibly foolish, but I bought something for baby, I couldn't bear not buying something for Mummy aswell.'

'Oh John,' Anna took the rabbit from his hand, her bottom lip trembling as she regarded it in her grasp. 'Thank you.'

'That's alright,' John said softly, rubbing Anna's upper arm. 'And I mean it, I had a fantastic day.'

'Me too.'

Their gaze met for a moment, John using all the strength he could not to lean forward and meet Anna's lips with his own. Maybe his mother was right, he needed a day like today to make him wake up to his true feelings. Clearing his throat, just as he felt his courage growing, Anna began to walk further up the stairs, causing John to lose his nerve.

'Night Anna,' he called after her.

'Night,' she replied in a whisper before disappearing from his view. Inwardly cursing himself, he followed in the direction Anna had taken, before diverting into his own room.

* * *

'Well Anna, we're all done here. The baby is developing normally. As you heard from the heartbeat, your baby is in fine health,' the sonographer explained as Anna sat up on the bed and restored herself to her normal state.

'That's good to here,' John replied, looking up at Anna who was smiling broadly. 'It was amazing to see the baby so clearly.'

'Do you know the sex of the baby?' Anna asked, turning her attentions to the sonographer who was busy printing a picture of the scan.

The sonographer began to nod her head. She handed the scan picture to John. 'Yes, I was able to tell. But it's hospital policy not to tell the parents, in case I'm wrong.'

'How sure are you?' Anna continued questioning as she stood up.

'I'm not at liberty to say.' The sonographer moved to the door and opened it. 'You'll need to book in a check-up and a scan for four weeks time so we can assess the babies position. I'll look forward to seeing you soon.'

John followed Anna to the reception desk, remaining silent as she made her next appointment. Once finished, John looked down at Anna as they made their way out of the hospital.

'What was that all about?' John asked as they reached the car park.

'What was what?' Anna shrugged, John unlocking the car as they reached it.

'I thought we had agreed we wouldn't find out the sex of the baby till it was born.'

'I'm allowed to be curious, am I not?' Anna asked, opening the car door. John didn't respond until he sat beside her, affording her that smirk once more. 'John! Stop looking at me like that and take me for some lunch.'

Obliging the woman sat beside him, it wasn't long until John and Anna were sitting at a table for two in the steakhouse they had visited the night John told Anna he wanted to be involved in the babies life. It felt apt to come here, especially after the successful scan they had just experienced.

'So, we've never spoken about it.' John began as he perused his menu. 'What do you want? A boy or a girl?'

'Oh God, as long as it's healthy then I...'

'Rubbish,' John cut Anna short. 'Everyone always says that.'

'Alright, as a woman I would love a daughter. But I really don't mind a son, so long as the baby is healthy that is all that matters.'

'I'd love a daughter,' John agreed, not averting his eyes from his menu as he spoke. 'But as you say, so long as it's healthy.'

'Any names?' Anna asked, John's answer intriguing her.

'Oh yes,' John nodded enthusiastically but the glint in his eye betrayed how serious he was attempting to sound. Anna braced herself for what she was about to hear. 'River for a boy, Rihanna for a girl.'

'John, be serious...'

'What? I am,' John argued. 'I admire Rihanna's work.'

'Yes, we all know what you admire about Rihanna,' Anna raised her eyebrow as the waiter approached. 'River Bates does have a nice ring to it though.'

'No way is a child of mine being called River. I was joking.'

'Thank God,' Anna laughed before the waiter began to speak.

'Good afternoon, we are both looking in high spirits. Good morning?'

'Yes, I've just had my five month scan,' Anna explained, placing a hand on her stomach.

'Well, then you and your partner have my sincerest congratulations.'

'Oh no,' Anna jumped in, looking at John. 'We aren't together.'

'Well, whoever the lucky man may be...'

'No he's the Dad,' Anna explained. 'We just aren't together.'

'Anna, you don't have to explain anything to him,' John whispered across the table. 'He's a perfect stranger.'

'Well, can I say how well pregnancy suits a beautiful woman like yourself,' the waiter smiled. 'May I take your order?'

John allowed Anna to monopolise the conversation, then remained silent as he watched the waiter flirt with her every time he approached their table. He visited them more than the other tables he was waiting on and John hated it. The way the man spoke to her, the way Anna responded with giggles and lingering looks. As they reached the time to look at the dessert menu, John decided he wouldn't join Anna in a sweet.

'I've got a meeting with a client this afternoon that I need to prepare for,' he explained, leaving some money to pay for the meal on the table. 'I'm going out with Rob tonight, but l'll call you afterwards.'

'Oh, okay,' Anna replied disappointedly. 'Are you sure?'

'Yeah,' John stood up. 'But you stay, have a pudding.'

'Can I tempt you with a dessert? The waiter was back, John exhaling deeply on his arrival.

'Oh, yes please,' Anna replied, her attentions now fully on the waiter. John walked away without another word, Anna looking up to seeing him leave. ' John?'

John didn't look back as he left the restaurant.

* * *

Anna sat at the table as Mary moved around her kitchen as if she owned it, making them some dinner. She loved nights in with her best friend. Anna admired how Mary would always tell it like it is, consequences be damned. It was a trait Anna wished she possessed.

'He was obviously jealous you were flirting with the waiter,' Mary explained, chopping a cucumber in the process. 'And you got his number, good girl. What's his name?'

'Neil.'

'Well, we can over look that,' Mary tossed her head from side to side before throwing the freshly chopped cucumber in the salad bowl. 'And he doesn't mind that you are pregnant?'

'Well, I'm not actually going to see him again, am I?'

'Why not?' Mary asked, reaching into the fridge for some tomatoes.

'Well, John...'

'Oh for God's sake. You are having a baby with John. That is all.'

'That is all?' Anna replied, hardly able to believe what she was hearing. 'That's a pretty big all if you ask me. Yes, Neil was nice, he made me laugh. He wasn't bad looking either. Oh, I don't know. '

The doorbell rang, Mary shaking her head as Anna disappeared down the hall. She returned a couple of minutes later, carrying a huge bouquet of flowers.

'Wow, who are they from?' Mary cooed, putting down the knife she was using to take a closer look.

Anna placed the flowers down on the table before detaching the small card that accompanied the flowers. She read the card in silence, Mary taking it upon herself to fill a vase with water whilst she did.

_Dear Anna, sorry for being such a grump today. Looking forward to meeting River. Or Rihanna. What the waiter said is what I should have, you are a beautiful woman. John x_

'They're from John,' Anna replied, handing the card to Mary before taking over putting the flowers in water. 'Why is he making this so hard for me?'

'Making what hard?' Mary asked as she examined the card before looking at her friend. The flowers now in the vase, Anna was staring into space. Mary approached her, leaning back against the counter beside Anna. 'You are in love with him, aren't you?'

'Oh, so what if I am?' Anna replied, sighing before realising that was the first time she had admitted it out loud. 'But he doesn't feel the same.'

'Well, that card would suggest differently,' Mary countered.

'No, he doesn't. Sometimes I think he does, then he'll say something or do something that makes me realise he can't do.'

'Well then, you have a choice. You can waste your time obsessing over whether anything is ever going to happen, or just accept the only relationship you will have with him is being the mother of his child.'

Suddenly, Anna's phone began to vibrate on the table. Picking it up, Anna saw she had a text message. 'It's from Neil.'

'And?'

'He wants to meet me for a drink.'

* * *

Robert slammed his pint glass down on the table, annoyed as John looked at his phone once more. He kept his gaze on John as he began to open the bag of crisps he had just bought with the last round.

'Everything alright Rob?' John asked, locking his phone before taking a swig from his own pint.

'You and your bloody phone,' Robert hissed before crunching a crisp in his mouth. 'Anna is it?'

'Yeah,' John smiled. 'Thanking me for the flowers I sent her this afternoon.'

'You smooth operator, everything is going swimmingly with the baby, I take it?'

'Great,' John nodded, nicking a crisp from Robert. 'Developing normally and the sonographer even said she knew the sex.'

'Did you find out?'

'No, Anna wanted to know but she said the woman wasn't allowed to tell us.' John explained as he stole another crisp from his friend.

'Do you want your own packet?' Robert snapped. As the words fell from his mouth, John's phone vibrated once again. 'I wonder who this could be?'

'It's Anna.'

'No way,' Robert replied sarcastically before shoving another handful of crisps into his mouth. His gaze narrowed as he noticed John's face fall. 'What is it?'

'The waiter from lunch. She gave him her number.'

'So?' Robert shrugged. 'You aren't together. You told me you don't even like her in that way.' John remained silent as he placed his phone back on the table. 'You don't do you?'

John met Robert's gaze before rubbing hand over his forehead. 'Oh I don't know. I don't know. I just know the thought of her going out with that waiter...'

'I don't know why don't you both just give in and be together,' Robert said matter-of-factly. 'We've all seen it.'

'Seen what?' John asked.

'Come on John, we aren't idiots.'

John raised his eyebrows in Robert's direction. 'Really?'

'Steady.' Robert replied with a smile. 'We've all seen the little looks, John. How you'll do anything for her. It makes sense for you to be together...'

'That may be. I just can't be in a relationship though, Rob. After what's happened. I just can't.'

'Well, I've got news for you mate,' Robert said as John lifted his phone, receiving yet another text message. 'You already are.'

* * *

Sitting in the darkness of Robert's living room, all John could think about was Anna. She had texted to say she wasn't sure if she was going to go out with the waiter or not, and that was how it had been left between them. He had decided against calling her, he certainly didn't want her to answer if she was out with another man. Cora and Robert was asleep upstairs, John and his friend having arrived him a couple of hours previously. Robert's words had shaken John up. It was true, he and Anna were in a relationship, the only thing that was missing were the shows of affection, amongst other things which John refused to think about.

The knock of the door brought John out of his thoughts, furrowing his brow as to who it could be. Realising it was probably Sybil forgetting her key, John trudged towards the front door. Upon opening it, he was surprised to see Anna standing on the doorstep.

'Sorry but I had to see you.' Anna said, stepping inside.

'Never be sorry for wanting to see me,' John replied, closing the door before following her into the living room. 'How did you get here?'

'I walked. Why is it dark in here?' Anna asked, switching on a light. John shrugged before Anna continued to speak. 'I had to see you because it's moved.'

'What's moved?' John asked, a puzzled look overtaking his face. Anna waited for him to realise her meaning. His voice was barely a whisper as he suddenly understood. 'The baby?'

'Yes,' Anna nodded, her face beaming as John moved towards her. 'You won't be able to feel it yet, but it definitely moved.'

'I believe you,' John laughed, resting a hand on her stomach. Their eyes met, Anna was sure she detected a hint of a tear threatening to spill from John's eye. 'I should have been there.'

'Why? You wouldn't haven't been able to feel anything.'

'Yes, but I feel like I'm missing so much, especially now we are moving into the latter stages of the pregnancy.' John stepped back, suddenly remembering where Anna might have been that evening. 'Did it happen whilst you were with him?'

'With who?'

'That waiter.' John answered harshly, putting his hands in his pockets.

Anna huffed impatiently, her demeanour turning slightly angry. 'Not that it's any of your business, I decided not to go out with him.'

'Oh.'

'Oh indeed,' Anna replied, looking visibly irritated before continuing. 'I don't believe you. What right do you have to be angry about me going out with someone else? Just because I am having your baby, doesn't mean I can't see other people. You nearly did.'

'Anna, that was months ago. I haven't seen anyone else since.'

'But you said we should both be open minded in case the other did meet someone else. Does that not still stand?'

'Its alright Anna, do what you want,' John argued, conscious of the people sleeping upstairs by trying to keep his voice low. Anna laughed cynically before walking past John. As she reached the doorway, John closed his eyes. 'If it's what you want Anna, I'll go on pretending I don't love you either.'

'What?'

She turned to look at him, his face was sincere, the tear that had been threatening before to fall as a result of the baby moving, now seemingly escaping for a different reason.

'What's the point in denying it anymore?' John replied, his voice quivering. 'I'm terrified of committing to a relationship, especially with my track record. But I'd love for you and me to give it a try.'

'John,' Anna's voice was softer as she approached him. 'Don't feel like you have to do this. I'd hate to think you were doing this so no one else can have me.'

'It's not that at all, Anna. Really, it isn't. In the beginning I was a fool. That morning, after our night together, I never should have left. I should have stayed, got to know you. The baby hasn't changed me, you have Anna. You're so beautiful, you make laugh. I've never felt this way before. I love you Anna.'

'I love you too, John.'

'You do,' John blurted out with a small laugh, reaching out to take Anna's hand.

'Have you really had no idea?'

'Well, I didn't want to say,' John was smiling now.

'Just shut up and kiss me.'

Doing as he was instructed almost instantly, John met Anna's lips in a tender kiss, wrapping an arm around her waist, using his other hand to gently stroke her face. Months of pent up passion were being released in this kiss as Anna tightened her grip on John, mutual gasps of appreciation escaping each of them.

'Anna,' John said weakly, breaking the kiss before brushing his lips lightly against Anna's once more, then resting his forehead against hers . 'You'll have to be patient with me.'

'We are already expecting a child, John.' Anna pointed out, both of them laughing softly at her remark.

'I know that, but I mean I don't want to mess this up. I do love you, and we are going to have a baby but I don't think we should rush into moving in with each other, or anything else until we've got to know each other in this new light.'

'I understand,' Anna replied, moving away from John yet taking his hand in hers. 'It's too important to rush. And I love you too.'

'I'll never tire of hearing that,' John whispered, touching his lips to Anna's once more. 'Come on, let me get you home.'


	7. October

**A/N- Cue fluffiness, John's self doubting and a little angst, not much but just a little. **

**Disclaimer:** _Nothing Downton related belongs to me..._

* * *

As a week between that evening where they had declared their love for each other came and went, it wasn't lost on either John or Anna that the situation was becoming very real now. Especially since Anna had now finished work for her maternity leave. Although a little early, it had always been Anna's intention to finish work with a couple of months to spare. She had always been shrewd with her money, and with the well paying job she found herself in and her savings which she hadn't touched for years, Anna could make the most of becoming a mother for the first time. She was lucky to have such loving support around her, and now with John by her side she knew she was set.

Although a little anxious about the actual birth, she just wanted the little one to be here now, to hold her baby in her arms. Although becoming pregnant came completely out of the blue, Anna was so happy that it had happened. She couldn't wait to hold her child in her arms, to look down into her their face and feel that rush so many new mothers say they experience.

The Saturday after Anna's last day at work arrived and with it, John's promise of building all the furniture for the nursery. Although he insisted they should paint the walls first, once the furniture had arrived and Anna had seen it, she couldn't wait any longer to see it all built. John relented, quashing her enthusiasm would break her heart, and in turn his.

'All the girls at work went in and got me all the Winnie The Pooh bedding I wanted,' Anna cooed, sorting through what seemed like hundreds of gift bags.

Her colleagues had been very generous, in particular Tom Branson, one of the partners at the law firm in which she worked, who in some distorted way was connected to the child she was carrying. In the intervening months between she and John getting to know each other, she had never realised John's Goddaughter, Sybil, had been dating her boss. It had only been a couple of months, yet it seemed things were progressing well between the young couple. Although he knew she was dating, John didn't like to pry into Sybil's private life. Mary, although she saw them often, rarely spoke about her sisters to Anna meaning she had no idea until Tom spoke to her at work on her last day.

'Gwen, ever the practical one brought us some top of the range baby monitors. And bless William and Daisy, they...' She was interrupted mid flow by the doorbell ringing. 'I'll go get that.'

'Alright sweetheart,' John replied half heartedly as he tried to make sense of a sheet of instructions to the cot he was building. He turned them upside down then looked over his shoulder at the person who was meant to be helping him. His assistant was busy playing 'Row, row your boat' on a toy piano someone had given Anna as a present for the baby. 'Robert!'

'What?' Robert shrugged before he began to lightly press one of the keys. 'I was waiting for you to tell me what to do.'

'Me give you orders? Never. ' John laughed as he turned his attentions back to his instruction sheet. 'Although if I had maybe I wouldn't have got shot in the leg.'

'Not this again, Bates,' Robert sighed, walking towards his friend with the piano still in his hand. 'Your leg is alright now isn't it?'

'Yeah, the five inch long scar is rather attractive,' John joked. His smile soon turned into a grimace as Robert began to attack the keys on the piano with a little more vigour. 'Alright Elton. Put it down. That is for my child, not you.'

'Come on John, he or she isn't going to have the cognitive skills to play it for at least a year.' Robert pointed out as Mary appeared at the door, followed by Anna.

'Working hard, boys?' Mary asked, one eyebrow raised, regarding her father playing with a child's toy. 'You haven't even started yet.'

'Come on, Mary. Lets leave the boys to it.' Anna suggested, meeting John's rather annoyed gaze.

'I'll go and make us a tea then it's full steam ahead,' Robert walked past John and followed Mary downstairs, leaving John and Anna alone.

'You off out?' John enquired, dropping the instruction sheet down on top of the assorted pieces of wood and fixings. Locking his gaze with Anna's, he held out his arms towards her. She willingly accepted his embrace, wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head against his chest.

'Yeah, Mary's taking me out for lunch. I've made you boys some sandwiches. There is a tray in the fridge.'

'Lovely, thanks.' John kissed the top of Anna's head before continuing. 'So, how does it feel? Work all finished, maternity leave started.'

'Scary, exciting,' Anna answered in a hushed tone, lifting her head from John's chest to look into his eyes. 'This is it now. It's all getting so close.'

John hummed his agreement, tightening his grip around Anna's waist. Despite her baby bump seemingly growing with each day that passed, she still felt reassuringly close to John. She needed his comfort especially now her tension about the actual birth was growing as the due date edged ever closer.

'I'm so glad we, well... you know. Decided to be together.' Anna was flustered as her words escaped her.

'There's no need to be so shy with me,' John chuckled, kissing the top of Anna's head once again as he did so. 'For what it's worth, I'm glad too.'

Since admitting their love for each other, John and Anna had been taking their relationship slowly. John hadn't stayed the night at Anna's, nor had they gone much further than a kiss and a cuddle whilst watching a late night film. Taking their time getting to know each other in this new way was of paramount importance to the two of them, anything else would only complicate matters further. Although, in Mary's opinion, they were already expecting a baby together, surely being together made things easier. Ever the straight talker, what was complicated about their situation she couldn't fathom.

'Put him down, Anna,' Mary bellowed up the stairs as Robert re appeared carrying two mugs of tea.

'Honestly Rob, how did such a softly spoken man produce such a foghorn of a daughter?' John asked as he released Anna from his grasp.

'She's the milkman's,' Robert replied without missing a beat, walking to the window and placing the mugs he was holding on the windowsill.

'Well, that would explain my good looks because I certainly didn't get them from you, father.'

Thinking she hadn't followed him, John and Anna began to laugh as Robert flashed a shade of crimson at having been heard. 'Darling, I...'

'Come on, Anna.' Mary turned on her heel began to trudge down the stairs.

'I'll see you tonight?' Anna asked, squeezing John's hand.

'I'll be here,' John replied, smiling broadly before reluctantly letting go. 'Have a nice afternoon.' Watching her as she walked away, John's smile remained as he turned to look at Robert who was observing with an amused expression on his face. 'What?'

'You got it bad,' Robert said teasingly. 'You never used to look at Vera like that.'

'Can you really compare the two?'

'No, but you married Vera. You won't even spend the night with Anna.' Robert took a sip of his tea before moving towards John. 'Mind you, been there, done that.'

'Sssh, she might hear you,' John hissed as the front door slammed shut at the same time. 'Let's get this cot built shall we? Then we can start on the chest of drawers.'

'Wow, what an offer,' Robert replied, looking at the fixings John had laid out on the floor in different piles.

'Don't touch them.' John raised his hand suddenly, stopping Robert in his tracks. He held up the instructions for Robert to look at so he could follow what John was about to explain. 'They are laid out in order. From A to G. Each part of the cot has a number, one to eight. So if you'd like to start laying them out over there, I'll drink my tea then we'll begin.'

'Can't we just bodge it?' Robert asked, kneeling down in front of the box that held the main frame of the cot. 'Ignore the instructions. We were in the army for God's sake, we used to put guns together in five seconds flat.'

'Yes, but this isn't a gun. It is a baby's cot. And not just any baby, my baby. He or she shall sleep in this for the best part of the first two years of their life. So, if I ever do anything properly in my life, it shall be this.'

'Plus, Anna would kill you if it fell apart.'

'That too,' John agreed.

'So, how are really feeling?' Robert asked, not averting his attention from the pieces of cot he was pulling out of the box. 'About becoming a Dad. Anna.'

'I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous.' He tapped the edge of his mug, staring into space as he spoke. 'But I'm excited about becoming a Dad. Something to finally live for.'

'And Anna?'

'We're taking things slowly. Which I'm relieved about.'

'Why do you say that?' Robert asked, looking at the instructions then regarding the pieces of wood he had laid out in front of him.

'Well, after how things ended with Vera, I'm not sure I could stand having my heart broken again like that.'

'Who says Anna will break you heart?' Robert stood and walked towards John, reaching beside him on the windowsill for his own drink. John didn't reply, simply choosing to drink the rest of his tea in one gulp. 'Vera was wrong for you from the beginning. Even you admit that you never loved her truly. You love Anna, don't you?'

'Oh yes,' John nodded without a hint of insincerity, a grin returning to his lips. 'But that's half the problem. If something does go wrong, it will feel a hundred times worse than when things ended with Vera.'

'Who say's it's going to end?' Robert exclaimed, looking to the ceiling, his tone slightly exasperated.

'This is me, Rob,' John answered cynically. 'I've already struck it lucky in becoming a father, thinking I'll be with the love of my life for the rest of my days deems me slightly cocky.'

'You're so full of crap.' Robert laughed, nudging John slightly in the ribs with his elbow. 'Take things slowly by all means, but I truly believe you and Anna are meant to be. Everyone can see it. I'm celebrating my thirtieth wedding anniversary soon, I bet one day you and Anna will be too.'

John didn't respond, instead choosing to move towards the different parts of the cot assembled on the floor in front of him. 'Lets get building, shall we?'

* * *

'So no _Daydream Believer_, but you want _Come On Eileen_?'

John took a deep breath as he scribbled out yet another song choice from his notepad. He knew Cora was indecisive, and a perfectionist, but this evening organising a set list for his performing at their party was proving rather painful. As they sat at the dining room table, Mary and Anna watched amusedly from the living room, the adjoining doors between the two rooms open so they could offer input if needs be. Mary's suggestion of just singing Justin Timberlake's back catalogue hadn't been well received, as well as Anna's of John singing Robbie Williams.

'Then, everyone knows _Daydream Believer_, don't they?' Robert argued.

'And everyone knows _Come On Eileen_,' Cora countered. 'Oh, hang on. What about Billy Joel? I love _Uptown Girl_.'

'For God's sake,' John said under his breath. 'This party is in two days. I need a set list before then so I can prepare. At this rate, come Saturday evening the three of us shall still be sat here.'

'To be honest, as long as you sing our song to start with I don't really care what else you add.' Robert replied matter-of-factly, looking at Cora as she regarded him with a wide smile on her face. 'As long as I can hold her in my arms for those few minutes, you could rap Eminem for the rest of the evening for all I care.'

'Oh Robert,' Cora leant forward and pressed her lips to her husbands.

'Oh brother,' John gasped, rubbing a hand over his face.

'Robert's right, just sing our song and then whatever you feel is right,' Cora said, still looking at Robert as she spoke, then turning to John as she added, 'but not Eminem.'

John slammed shut his notepad with a sigh of relief. 'I'll try to control myself. What is your song, by the way?'

John was distracted by a snigger coming from the sofa, his eyes immediately finding an amused Mary struggling to keep her laughter to the bare minimum.

'What? Our song is a classic love song...' Cora protested. Mary almost collapsed as her mother's words reached her ears, her laughter was now that great. Anna looked on, grinning yet having no idea why Mary was laughing with such heartiness.

'Oh God, what am I going to have to sing on Saturday night?' John leant back in his chair, folding his arms as Robert and Cora exchanged a glance, the latter clearly insulted by Mary's current behaviour.

'A timeless love song.' Cora reiterated. 'Donna Summer covered it but the Richard Harris version is our song.'

'Bloody hell, you are going to make me sing _MacArthur Park_, aren't you?'

'Yes,' Mary exclaimed in between her fit of giggles.

'I don't think I've ever heard of it,' Anna admitted, internally running the title over and over in her head.

'You're one of the lucky ones,' Mary said as she placed a hand on Anna's wrist. 'Many car journeys myself, Sybil and Edith were subjected to it, coupled with Mother and Father singing along in the front. The day they bought me a walkman was the best day of my life.'

'Having your relationship referred to as a cake, how does that sum up your love?' John questioned. 'I can't believe I was dreading you revealing it was _Hello_ or something like that.'

'Well, you have to sing it.' Cora said indignantly. 'We are paying you after all.'

'No you're not, my performing at your party is my gift to you,' John replied, a smug look spreading over his face.

'Damn it.' Cora said under her breath before taking in John's expression. Suddenly, she found the perfect argument to support her case. 'Well, who has let you live in their spare room for the past few years, virtually rent free for the first year or so I might add?'

'Damn it.' Now it was John's turn to curse. 'Alright, I'll sing the cake song.'

The night of the party arrived, and John nervously paced Anna's living room. He always felt more nervous before gigs where he was singing in front of people he knew. Singing in front of a roomful of strangers you never had to see again was preferable to having your performance critiqued for the next few years by people you saw on a regular basis.

He stopped to look at himself in the mirror that adorned Anna's wall above the fireplace. 'Get a hold of yourself, Bates.'

'Waistcoats suit you, you should always wear them.'

John was startled by Anna's voice behind him. He turned to face her, and as had become commonplace, she completely took his breath away. He forgot all about his nerves as he drank the vision of her in, looking so mesmerising in a black knee length dress that complimented her magnificently. He loved it when she wore her hair down, her blonde curls dancing upon her shoulders.

'You look stunning,' he breathed, closing the gap between them before reaching for Anna's hand. 'I will never know what I did to deserve you.'

'And Cora and Robert will never forgive us if we're late.' Anna added, letting go of John's hand and taking the black laced bolero she had left resting on her free arm and beginning to put it on. 'Let's get moving.'

John's set passed by without a hitch, his version of _MacArthur Park _well received, even if he did feel completely out of his comfort zone as he sang it. Robert and Cora shared the dance floor alone as he sang, John choosing to focus on them as looking at Anna would mean looking at Mary and he wasn't sure he would be able to keep his composure after one look at his best friend's daughter. Other's joined them on the dance floor as John wasted no time in beginning to sing Cora's rather more credible song choice, _Dancing On The Ceiling_. After numerous more classics from the seventies and eighties, John couldn't resist bringing things slightly more into the modern era, ending his performance with Robbie Williams' _Angels. _Exchanging knowing glances with Anna as he sang, he made it clear that he had chosen to sing this song especially for her.

Once finished, and leaving the entertainment now to the DJ who had arrived to take the party further into the night, John tried to enjoy himself. Although he didn't mind singing, dancing really wasn't his strong suit. He stood at the back of the room by the bar, watching Anna as she danced the night away, clearly not allowing being nearly seven months pregnant stand in her way. Everything was so perfect, John almost had to pinch himself to believe it was true. A beautiful girlfriend, a baby on the way, things like this didn't happen to him. There was a nagging doubt at the back of his mind as he watched Anna. He didn't feel worthy of such a beautiful, perfect woman. He was scared to let himself go too much, for fear she would soon realise she could do so much better than him and end things between them. He was brought out of his introspection by Anna walking towards him, her hand outstretched.

'I do believe you owe me a dance, Mr Bates,' Anna said as the DJ began to play _Can't Help Falling In _Love by Elvis Presley. 'And what perfect timing. I love this song.'

'Is there any song you don't love?' John enquired, smirking as he followed Anna onto the dance floor.

'Well I wasn't too keen on Cora and Robert's song, although I think you sang it well.'

Without another word, John was pulling Anna closer to him, his hands coming to rest on the small of her back, her own resting on his shoulders. As they began to move in time to the music, Anna rested her head on John's shoulder, he inhaling deeply and deciding in that moment he had never felt so much at peace in his life.

'This song could describe us,' Anna whispered.

'How so, Miss Smith?'

'Well, we rushed in, didn't we? The baby saw to that. But in the end, neither of us could help it, could help the fact of letting what was meant to be take its course.'

'We were meant to be then, were we?'

'I truly believe so, yes.' The conviction in her tone made John's heart beat a little faster. 'And although I am glad we are taking things slowly, the irrational part of me wonders why. Unless there is something you aren't telling me?'

As their gaze met, John was taken aback by the sincerity he found in Anna's eyes. It all seemed too good to be true, that she truly wanted to be with him despite all his flaws, the way he treated her at the very beginning which still haunted him to this very day. He still believed the past and his own insecurities as a result of his experiences would come back to ruin things, so he responded in the only way he knew how. Being honest would completely spoil the most beautiful of moments only Anna could have created.

'I love you,' John murmured.

'And I love you.' Anna replied before pressing her lips softly against John's, he closing his eyes in response.

'Okay, before I play the last song, Robert and Cora would like to say a few words.' The DJ invited Cora and Robert up onto the stage. A round of applause and cheers echoed around the room as Robert and Cora jumped up onto the stage, both looking as though they had made the most of their guests insisting they buy them a drink.

'Thank you all for coming,' Robert began, John was surprised to find he was sounding fairly coherent. 'I have been married to his beautiful woman, for thirty years and I can honestly say they have been magical. We've had our ups and downs but I have been lucky enough to share over half my life with the love of it by my side. How many can say that, eh?'

'He's a big softie,' John whispered to Anna, standing behind her as he wrapped his arms around her waist. Anna took hold of his forearms before resting her head back against his shoulder.

'It's lovely, to see them so in love after all this time.' Anna remarked, smiling as the happy couple shared a kiss on stage. 'Do you think we'll be like that?'

'Like what?'

'Still so happy on our thirtieth anniversary.' Anna replied.

John cleared his throat before answering. 'I wouldn't like to say, my love. I don't want to tempt fate.'

'Here's to the next thirty years.' Robert raised his pint glass into the air. 'And here's to my beautiful wife, Cora.'

* * *

'A penny for them.' John whispered, looking down at Anna.

Walking Anna home after the party, the venue a short walk from her house, John noticed she was very quiet. As they reached the bottom of Anna's street, John decided to question her.

'For what?' Anna replied, startled as John's gruff tones shook her from her thoughts.

'You've hardly said two words since we left the party. What's up?'

'Oh, you'll think me silly,' Anna replied, trying to dismiss John's concerns. 'It's nothing really. '

'It must be something,' John pressed as they reached Anna's house. 'It's not like you to be this quiet.'

'Are you saying I have a big mouth, John Bates?' Anna's tone was playful as John followed her to her front door.

'There, that's better.' As they stopped on the doorstep, Anna turned around to face John who was standing in front of her now, hands in his pockets.

'What's better?'

'You're smiling again.' John answered, a smile of his own spreading upon his lips as Anna's grew wider at his words. ' I don't think I'll ever get enough of making you smile.' Anna lifted a hand to John's face, gently stroking his cheek. 'Are you going to tell me what's bothering you?'

'Oh, I don't know.' Anna removed her hand from John's cheek before running it through her hair. 'It's just all those beautiful ladies there tonight, in their size eight dresses, figures to die for. And there's me, this big frump trying to keep up with them. Don't get me wrong, I love being pregnant and I know it's not forever, I've just felt very unattractive recently and tonight brought it home for me.'

'You're being ridiculous,' John said with a small laugh. 'For what it's worth, there was a roomful of people at that party tonight and you were the only person I was looking at.'

Anna had no other response other than to lean up on her tiptoes, resting her hand on John's shoulders to steady herself, and place her lips upon his. He responded with vigour, his arms finding Anna's waist with ease. As she succeeded in deepening the kiss, John knew he needed to leave now for fear of things going further than would be good for either of them.

'I should go home,' John said breathlessly, pulling away from Anna.

'Maybe you should,' Anna replied, her eyes half lidded as she rested her forehead against John's.

He took a couple of steps backwards, it taking all the willpower he could muster not to scoop Anna up in his arms and show her how much he loved her, show her how grateful he was that she had walked into his life and turned it around completely, changed it for the better. But this was right. Taking things slowly was right. Rushing into relationships never worked and John had the emotional scars to prove it.

'Good night,' John said softly then placed his hand on Anna's stomach. 'Good night, little one.' He looked up at Anna once more. 'I'll call you tomorrow.'

'We'll be waiting.'

* * *

Busy making himself some lunch in the kitchen, John was startled by his phone vibrating on the table behind him. Reaching for it, the knife he was cutting his sandwich with in the other, he smiled as he read a text message from Anna.

_Looking forward to decorating tomorrow. Mary and me picked up the yellow paint and rollers, all you need to do is be here. Miss you, Anna x_

John smiled as he began to compose a reply, before Robert appeared at the kitchen door. John looked to his friend who seemed to be wearing a troubled expression. Dropping his phone back down on the table, John turned back to the sandwich he was in the middle of making.

'Everything okay, mate?' John asked as Robert sat down. John placed his sandwich in front of Robert. 'Eat that.'

'Oh, I couldn't eat a thing.' Robert pushed the plate away. 'I'm too nervous.'

'Fair enough,' John shrugged, joining Robert at the table. He pulled the plate towards him and picked up the one half of the sandwich. 'What are you nervous about?'

'What I'm about to tell you, actually.'

'What is it?' John asked, dropping his sandwich back down onto the plate.

'It's Sybil,' Robert began, leaning forward so his arms were resting on the table. 'She's going travelling, you see. With Tom. We found out a couple of weeks ago.'

'And? What has that got to do with me? Good luck to her, I say.' John took a bite from his sandwich before looking back at Robert's face still wearing that same troubled expression.

'The thing is they see going away together as a test. Of their relationship. And if they are still going strong when they return, they shall marry. Which means, Sybil will move out.'

'Right...' John's raised a sceptical eyebrow, chewing slowly on his food as he waited for Robert to continue.

'So, myself and Cora see this as the perfect time to downsize. We have been thinking about it for a while. A house for just the two of us. See, even if Sybil comes back and things don't work out with Tom, we have already said we'll help fund a place of her own.'

'Basically, I have to find somewhere else to live?' John asked, suddenly not feeling very hungry anymore and pushing his sandwich away.

'We were happy to have you these past few years, John. Believe me. And I was so glad we were able to support you in finding your way again.'

'I appreciate everything you have done for me Robert. I will be eternally grateful. I'm just not sure where I go from here.'

Robert furrowed his brow, slightly confused at his friends reaction. 'I knew you'd be slightly shocked at the news, but the answer is simple, isn't it? You'll move in with Anna and the baby when it's born.'

John's face fell as he shifted uncomfortably in his chair. 'I can't.'

'Why on earth not?' Robert's voice was incredulous as he replied. 'You do love Anna, don't you?'

'Of course,' John stood up and walked over to the window that overlooked the garden. 'I'm just terrified.'

'Terrified of what? Being in love? Building a life with a wonderful woman?'

John averted his gaze from the garden, choosing to cast his eyes downward. 'Of losing it all. I just can't seem to let my past go.'

'Look, we aren't looking to move until after Christmas. I know Vera hurt you, but it's time to stand on your own two feet. You've grown comfortable here, I think that's half the trouble.' Robert stood up, taking half of John's sandwich with him before John's voice stilled his movements.

'What is wrong with me, Rob?'

'How long have you got?' Robert chuckled.

Choosing to ignore his friends teasing, John continued as he treaded the kitchen floor towards Robert. 'Why can't I just accept Anna wants me and move things along? The thought should excite me, not petrify me.'

'I can't answer that. What I would suggest is not to voice your doubts to Anna. You'll only upset her. You know the score now, take these weeks before the baby is born to decide what it is you want. All I know is it isn't fair to string Anna along if you never really intend to make a real go of things with her.'

'God, I love her so much Robert.' He closed his eyes as he spoke, his voice filled with conviction. 'She invades my every waking thought, and she has done for so long I can't remember what it's like not to think about her.'

Robert smiled at his friend before walking to the door. 'I can't tell you how to live your life, John. Only you truly know your heart. All I know is, from the outside looking in, you and Anna seem perfect for each other. Built to last.'

'Robert, are you taking me to IKEA or not?' Cora yelled from the front door.

John and Robert shared a laugh before John added, 'like mother, like daughter eh?'

* * *

Anna leant against the doorframe, eyes darting here, there and everywhere as the baby's nursery was beginning to take shape. She still had a few final finishing touches she wanted to make, but all in all she was happy with the results. The teddy that John bought in London took pride of place sitting in the cot, a perfect accompaniment to the bedding her colleagues had bought for the baby. Walking towards the cot, Anna took the teddy bear into her grasp, squeezing it softly.

'Here you are,' John announced his arrival, standing in the doorway to the nursery. He moved towards her as Anna placed the teddy back in the cot. 'Are you happy with it all?'

'It's better than I could have imagined,' Anna admitted truthfully. 'And only makes me more excited. I just wish he or she was here with us now. Then everything would be perfect. Me, you and our baby.'

There is was again. That feeling of dread that seemed to fill John whenever his and Anna's relationship was discussed. Which made what he was about to say sound even more absurd, however the baby was a certainty. His and Anna's being happy together wasn't.

'Shall we get on with listing names for the little one then?'

Once downstairs in the living room, the conversation was lively as John and Anna exchanged their favourite names. Choosing to share a bowl of popcorn as they devated, both had decided they wanted to end the evening with three choices for a boy and three for a girl.

'So you really won't let me have Keanu?' Anna whined. 'Not even have it third on the list for a boy?'

'No.' John shook his head. 'Keanu Bates. It sounds ridiculous.'

'Bates is such a hard surname to put a name with. You need a two syllable name, that's for sure.'

'Erm, excuse me,' John argued, taking a handful of popcorn from the bowl on the coffee table and throwing it all over Anna. 'I've got along well enough with my one syllable.'

'Yeah, well John goes well with it.' Anna agreed, eating the popcorn John had showered her with. 'But that's already taken.'

'Unless we name the little chap after his father,' John suggested, his eyebrows raised in hope more than anything. The look on Anna's face told him all he needed to know. 'Very well, run over the names we have got so far.'

Anna picked up the notepad she had written the suggestions down in. 'Well, for a girl we have Jemima, Eva or Megan. As it's a Christmas baby we've decided on Holly for a middle name which suits any of those first names.'

'Good good,' John replied, nodding enthusiastically. 'And for a boy?'

'Well, your suggestion of Noel for a Christmas name has been unequivocally blackballed.' Anna began, scribbling John's suggestion out once more to reiterate her point. 'I do however like Robin, yet you don't. So we have Joseph or Winter at the moment...'

'Hang on, I blackballed Winter.' John interrupted, 'I'd rather have Keanu than Winter.'

'Very well,' Anna sighed as she scribbled something else out on the pad. 'So for a boy we have Joseph and nothing else. Christmas names for a boy are difficult.'

'What about Rudolph?' John suggested, Anna glaring at him before suddenly placing a hand on her stomach. John sat up at once. 'What is it?'

'Blimey, it's never kicked like that before.' Anna was breathless as she spoke before reaching out for John's hand. 'I think you might be able to feel it this time. Quick, give me your hand.'

John willingly let Anna take hold of his hand, guiding it to the place on her stomach where the baby was kicking. As soon as he came into contact with her skin, he could feel the baby moving within her. It was the most incredible feeling he had ever experienced. He let out a laugh, his face the picture of joy as Anna's eyes met his own.

'I can't believe it,' John breathed, the babies movements seeming to intensify with John's hand upon Anna's stomach. 'It's really going some, isn't it? Do you think it liked my suggestion of Rudolph?'

'Quite possibly,' Anna giggled. ' I've been feeling this for weeks, I'm so glad you can finally share it with me. How does it feel?'

'I can't describe it. Amazing. Bloody amazing.'

'You're face just then, it took my breath away,' Anna admitted, the baby's movements settling down, John was sure in no small part to hearing it's mother's hushed tones.

Anna took John's hand in her own, kissing his knuckles. John had to take a deep breath, the simplest of actions causing him to lose an element of self control. He watched as Anna placed soft kisses against his skin. She looked up at him, the sudden eye contact almost driving John over the edge. In the next moment, he was moving closer to her, all of his lingering doubts seemingly unimportant, forgotten, as he lost himself in the moment he currently found himself in.

'God Anna,' he gasped, moving his hand so it was resting against Anna's cheek.

'We shouldn't John.' He encouraged her to tilt her head, her moan was audible as John's lips found the sensitive skin of her neck. 'I'm not feeling at my best at the moment. I don't want you seeing me the way I am at the moment to put you off...'

'Anna.' John's voice was soft yet firm as he entwined his fingers with hers. 'I am so in love with you. Nothing is going to change that.'

Anna felt her eyes fill with tears as John began to kiss her hand just like she had kissed his moments earlier. 'I love you too, John. I want this to happen, I really do. But, as I told you before, I'm just not feeling very desirable at the moment.'

'You are the most beautiful woman I have ever known, Anna.' John stood up, not letting go of Anna's hand as he did so. 'Last time I didn't show you the respect you deserved and I still hate myself for that. Let me show you how much I desire you, how much I love you. Please.'

Anna stood, never averting her gaze from John's. No man had ever looked at her in the way in which he was now. It set every fibre of her being on fire. Even on their previous night together, Anna couldn't remember John making her feel like this. She chanced a glance towards the stairs before looking at him again. Suddenly, there was only one thing Anna wanted.

'Take me to bed.'

Not even a heartbeat had passed between them before John was leading Anna out of the living room and up the stairs to her bedroom. No words were spoken as John slowly opened Anna's bedroom door, she closing it behind her with a click. In the next moment John's hands were on her, his mouth crushing against Anna's as he carefully moved them to sit on the edge of the bed.

'Are you sure about this?'

'Yes,' Anna whimpered in reply as John turned his attentions to her neck. 'Make love to me, John.'

He didn't need much more persuasion.

* * *

**A/N 2-** _I chose not to write the smut, deciding to leave it up to your imaginations. Maybe next time... _


	8. November

**A/N- Sorry for the delay, as you may be aware my mum gets ill occasionally, this was one of those times. She's much better now. **

**It would be boring without a bit of angst, right? **

**Disclaimer-** Same as April to October...

* * *

Knowing the darkness filling the room didn't really tell him if it was still the middle of the night, or the break of morning John reached beside him for his mobile phone. November had come around, and with it its usual longer nights and shorter days. Carefully pressing the lock button on his phone, he was relieved to see the clock was only just creeping up to half past seven. Feeling a slight movement beside him, John put his phone back down to face the person he was lying beside.

'What time is it?' Anna's voice was hoarse with sleep, slightly louder than John had been anticipating.

'Only half seven,' John whispered, wrapping an arm around her waist. 'Go back to sleep, love.'

'One more day closer to turning thirty three.' Her voice was moaning this time, causing John to chuckle softly.

'Think of it this way,' John began, placing a hand upon Anna's stomach. 'A day closer to our beautiful baby being born.'

'I'm getting so old,' Anna wailed, completely ignoring what John had said. 'My baby will be a teenager as I'm drawing my pension.'

'Maybe for me, but not you unless they are bringing pensionable age down considerably.' John decided to change the subject swiftly, he could feel a dig about his age coming. 'So, what do you want for your birthday?'

'A Lamborghini?' Anna suggested hopefully more than seriously.

'Of course, Miss Smith,' John teased. 'What colour?'

'Black. It's very slimming you know.'

'So I've heard...'

John pulled Anna closer to him, meeting her lips in a kiss. Many mornings had been spent like this since the first night they had shared together. The shift in their relationship had been natural, the fact surprising John somewhat. He was still waiting for it to end. For Anna to realise she had made a big mistake. Yet, that moment hadn't arrived. Each night he found a reason to stay, there was no where on earth he would rather be than sleeping by this wonderful woman's side. All this he had admitted to himself, yet the thought of committing himself fully and asking Anna if he could move in scared him half to death. Robert and Cora would spend evening after evening looking through property magazines and searching the internet looking for their perfect home. They had even viewed a handful. This was happening. John had some decisions to make.

Suddenly, the sound of the doorbell buzzing interrupted their moment, Anna jumping back in fright as the sound reverberated up the stairs.

'Bloody hell,' she gasped, John chortling at her reaction before resting his forehead against hers. 'I best go and answer that.'

John reluctantly let Anna leave his hold, watching as she covered her 'The Muppets' pyjamas in a fluffy nightgown, the hood of which made her look like a boxer about to enter the ring. Her bump was prominent, John allowing his gaze to rest there as she left the room. Listening as she answered the door, John leant back and closed his eyes as he instantly recognised the voice that greeted Anna.

'Up and at 'em, sunshine.' It was Mary. 'You have remembered we are going shopping in York today? To cheer me up after not getting the promotion at work? Idiots that they are. You haven't remembered have you?'

The voices faded into muffles then, Anna had obviously lead Mary into the kitchen. Deciding any thoughts of a lie in were now extinguished, John decided to get dressed and use Mary's presence to his advantage. He knew exactly what to get Anna for her birthday, and her best friend could help.

'Look, how many times do I have to say I am sorry?' Anna groaned, opening the cupboard and pulling down three mugs.

'Three mugs. Why three?'

'Good morning, Mary.' Mary turned to see John appear in the kitchen doorway, half dressed as he held onto his shoes with one hand, his sweater over his arm. She looked up at him, arms folded as John moved to kiss Anna on the cheek before sitting opposite Mary at the table.

'Ahh, that explains it,' Mary raised her eyebrows as she regarded John now putting his shoes on. 'When lover boy is here everyone else gets forgotten.'

'Jealous, are we?' John teased, looking up at Anna and winking.

'As if anyone would be jealous of you, John.' Mary quipped back, the interchange between her boyfriend and best friend causing Anna to giggle. 'See you didn't even bother to bring a change of clothes. You were wearing that same outfit when you had dinner with my parents last night.'

'Well,' John began before meeting Anna's gaze once more, 'I didn't know I would be staying.'

'You make me feel ill,' Mary grimaced, gratefully accepting a coffee from Anna and taking a sip. 'She's nearly eight months pregnant for goodness sake.'

'It's my fault,' Anna stepped in to defend John. 'It must be the hormones because I am all for it at the moment. Up for it at all hours.'

'And don't I know it,' John replied, smirking in Anna's direction as she placed a cup of tea in front of him.

'Please, stop,' Mary begged. 'Are we going shopping or what? We can still catch the half eight train if you are quick.'

'Alright, alright. I'll just go and get ready.' Anna moved to the door before looking back over her shoulder at John. 'Will you still be here when I come back down?'

'As if I'd leave without giving you a kiss goodbye.'

'Blimey, it's like being in a Mills and Boon novel. Smith, go and get ready. Quickly.'

Watching as Anna disappeared, listening to her footsteps carrying her up the stairs slowly becoming quieter, John sensed his opportunity. Moving to the counter and finding a pen, he tore a piece of paper from the memo pad on Anna's notice board before sitting back opposite Mary.

'What are you doing?'

'I need your help,' John said in response to Mary's question. 'Anna's favourite songs. What are they?'

'Why?' Mary shrugged. 'Can you not ask her yourself? Well, I suppose you don't find much time to talk.'

'Please Mary. I want to make her a CD for her birthday. Of me singing her favourite songs.'

'Aww, how sweet.' Mary remarked before taking another sip of her coffee. 'And yet stomach-turningly cringy at the same time.'

John was losing patience, beginning to tap his fingers on the table. 'Mary. I want to give her something unique...'

'Didn't you do that eight months ago?'

'Mary!' John exclaimed before instantly calming at the sight of her staring back at him, wide eyed. He was sure he had never met a more excruciatingly frustrating woman, Vera included. 'Please help me.'

'Oh alright,' Mary sighed, leaning forward, elbows resting on the table. 'Angels by Robbie is a given. Anything by Olly Murs. Hungry Eyes as well. Oh, she loves Nessun Dorma...'

'Pavarotti?' John furrowed his brow. 'Really?'

'No, not really but I'd love to hear you attempt it.'

'Very funny. Anything else?'

* * *

He hadn't stayed over the night before, Anna didn't want to admit to feeling a little put out at the fact. He hadn't made any plans for her birthday with her either. Mary was throwing a little party in the evening at the Crawley's, as far as she knew that would be the first time she saw John that day. Rising to her feet, nine o clock quite early for her to be getting up nowadays, she took her phone from the bedside table to be greeted with a birthday text from her Mum. Her parents were half way through a round the world cruise, booked before Anna fell pregnant. She smiled as she looked at the picture contained within the message of her Dad in shorts sitting on a sun lounger, holding a sign saying 'Happy Birthday Anna' and 'Hello Bump.'

As she walked down the stairs, Anna could tell something was amiss. She was sure she had closed the living room door last night, although she noticed it was wide open as she reached the bottom stair. Tying her robe tightly, she moved cautiously towards the open door. Peering into the room, the sight that greeted her almost took her breath away. She couldn't see her furniture for the amount of balloons that stood, attached to ribbons weighted down to the floor. Noticing a rather large teddy bear sitting on the coffee table, she also observed resting against the bear was a card and a CD case, accompanied by a pink gift bag. Moving closer to the table, she soon recognised the writing on the card as John's handwriting. On the table also rested a note:

_Anna, _

_John asked me to set this up for you. Hope you don't mind me breaking into your flat before I went to work. You gave me the spare key so I assumed you wouldn't mind. He has some business to attend to today but will see you this evening. _

_Don't forget, be at mine for half 7. _

_Happy Birthday,_

_Mary x_

Anna had given Mary her spare door key in case of emergencies, especially now she was pregnant but had forgotten all about it. How Mary set all this up without Anna realising she couldn't fathom, yet she had been sleeping so well recently Anna was sure World War Three could be going on outside her window and she wouldn't have been woken. However, none of that mattered as she knelt down beside the coffee table, dying to see what John had bought her. The business he was attending to fascinated her, maybe he hadn't forgotten her birthday after all.

The gift bag was full of toiletries, things Anna could use to pamper herself and was most welcome as the weight of being eight months pregnant was taking it's toll. Happy with his choices in shower gels and body butters, Anna turned her attentions to the CD case. Opening it, she watched as a small note fell out. Picking it up, she read what it said to herself:

_Mary helped me choose the songs, so if they are wrong, blame her. Happy Birthday x_

Believing he had made her a mix CD, even though it could be done at the click of a button nowadays, Anna was genuinely touched he had gone to so much effort to make her a compilation of her favourite songs. However as she pressed play on her CD player, she soon realised he had gone to a whole lot more effort than she had originally anticipated. She sank down onto the sofa as the music filled the room. On the first track, John's sultry tones were doing their best version of Elvis's _Can't Help Falling In Love_, the song they had danced to at Robert and Cora's party. He had made her a CD of her favourite songs alright, yet he was the person who was singing them. John really did have the most beautiful voice, Anna was certain in that moment she had never received a better present. She became entranced as she listened to each track, eager to hear what was next.

All her favourites were included. So many of the songs he had chosen evoked different memories within her, _Hungry Eyes _was a particular highlight, the song he had sung the first night they had met. His version of _I'd Love To Be Your Last_, the song Anna had broken down to on the way to Daisy's wedding, caused her to cry once more. She laughed as he fumbled his way through a version of _Hot in Herre _by Nelly, a song which reminded her of her university days where she and Mary formed their friendship. She found herself overcome once more as she listened to him singing every note of _Angels_ as if his life depended on it before smiling as he ended the disc with his rendition of _Troublemaker _by Olly Murs.

Picking up her phone to send John a text message to inform him she loved her present, she was startled by the doorbell. Walking to the door, she opened it to be met by a young man holding a gigantic bouquet of flowers. Her smile instantly widening, the man looked at the clipboard balancing precariously on his free arm before looking back at Anna.

'Anna Smith?'

'Yes.'

'These are for you. Happy Birthday.'

'Thank you,' Anna said as she took the bouquet from the delivery man. After closing the door, Anna took the flowers through to the kitchen. Reaching for the card, she opened it and saw they were from John.

_Thank you for giving me something to live for. Happy Birthday, all my love, John. x _

Anna sat down on the dining room chair, clutching the small card in her hands. If this was what all her birthdays were to be like from now on, she wouldn't mind growing older each year.

* * *

'I think it's perfect,' John announced as Robert arrived back at the table with two pints in his hand. 'Two bedrooms so one for the little one if he or she ever stays, one for me. A lovely view over the communal gardens, a balcony big enough to fit a barbecue.' John looked up to see his friends heated gaze upon him, a disapproving look taking over Robert's features. 'What?'

Robert shook his head before answering. 'Nothing. But have you thought how Anna is going to react when you tell her you are moving into a new flat?'

'Come on, Robert. This is perfect...'

'For you maybe. She is going to be broken hearted.'

That morning, Robert had accompanied John to view a flat a few minutes drive from Anna's house. John felt this was for the best. When the inevitable happened, and Anna realised she had made a mistake, he wouldn't have the added trauma of moving all his stuff out of her house. It made sense to him.

'You need to get over this mate,' Robert remarked as he wrapped his hand around his pint glass.

'Get over what?'

'This belief that Anna is going to end things. I've seen you both together, I really don't think she is.'

'Robert, things like this...'

'Don't happen to me.' Robert finished his friends sentence, John looking up to meet his friends gaze. 'What is this all really about, John? Are you still hung up over Vera?'

'Are you asking if I am still in love with my ex wife?'

'No, I mean the way she treated you towards the end must have damaged you greatly.'

John was becoming more flustered at his friends line of questioning. 'You mean the way she belittled me, made me feel worthless, completely destroyed my confidence when it comes to relationships? Yes, one doesn't find it easy to get over something like that.'

'She's made you scared of committing to another woman?'

Robert had hit the nail on the head. In that short sentence, he had summed up what was really bothering John.

'Perhaps. It also doesn't help that Anna is far too good for me. She'll soon realise that fact, so carrying on the way we have been recently means it will be easier in the long run. Besides, we have only been dating a few weeks. Baby aside, the idea of moving in together would be the furthest thing from either of our minds.'

'You are an interesting character,' Robert said with a chuckle. 'Maybe you should go back to the one night stands. Life was much simpler then.'

'That's not fair. Besides, we wouldn't even be discussing this if you and Cora weren't selling up.' John admitted, rather selfishly before instantly regretting his comment. 'Sorry.'

'Oh no, I'm sorry for not considering the feelings of a grown man who is capable of looking after himself. I'll go home and tell Cora the move is off, shall I?'

'Sorry,' John reiterated, looking at Robert. 'It was a stupid thing to say. I'll tell Anna I'm getting my own place for the time being, and that we'll re evaluate the situation in a year or so.'

Robert laughed out loud in response then took a swig from his pint as John regarded him with a confused look. 'I'm sure that will go down well.'

'What? I'm only being honest.'

'See, that's the thing John,' Robert began, banging a fist on the table. 'I don't think you are. I believe the truth is you want to move in with Anna, but you are letting the past get in the way. You are being, for want of a better phrase, a coward.' John had no come back, leaning back in his chair as he considered his friends words. 'Think about it before you commit to moving in to this flat. Carefully.'

* * *

Waiting on the doorstep at the Crawley's, Anna stood patiently for someone to open the door. As the door opened, she smiled as she took in the sight of Mary, party hat slightly askew upon her head. Blowing a party horn in her face, Mary placed a hand on Anna's shoulder to guide her inside.

'Here's the birthday girl,' Mary announced, closing the front door behind her before wrapping Anna in an embrace. 'Happy birthday my lovely, how are you?'

'Good. Thank you for your help with John's surprise. It was wonderful.'

'Glad you liked it,' Mary replied, helping Anna out of her coat. 'It was a bit cringe worthy if you ask me but...'

'Well, no one is asking you.' Anna retorted, folding her arms. 'Is he here?'

'Yeah, last seen being bored to death by Edith's bloke about something or other.' Mary looked over her shoulder into the living room as a flicker of movement in the kitchen caught Anna's eye. It was John. 'Look, I hope you don't mind but Sybil is here with her boyfriend, Tom. Your boss isn't he?'

'Of sorts,' Anna answered, keeping her eyes trained on the kitchen.

'Well, I've turned this into a joint party, they leave tomorrow and we weren't expecting them, they sort of just turned up.'

'It's fine,' Anna said, dying for her friend to finish speaking. 'Do you mind if I go and get a drink?'

'I do, I shall go and find you one.'

Anna grabbed Mary by the wrist as she made towards the kitchen. She hadn't seen John all day, and with a house full of guests she wasn't sure how soon she would get another opportunity to be alone with him.

'I'll manage, go and be with your sister. You won't see her for months after today.'

'You say that like it's a bad thing...' Mary remarked with eyebrows raised before she disappeared into the living room.

Sensing her chance, Anna moved towards the kitchen. He had his back to her, busy pouring different drinks into plastic tumblers. He was wearing the shirt she loved him in, a red checked pattern which fitted him perfectly. She leant against the fridge, waiting for him to turn around to see her before deciding he was taking too long.

'You know, you should sing more Nelly.'

John looked over his shoulder, instantly grinning as he took in the sight of Anna. She looked beautiful, a smile dancing on her lips as she moved to close the gap between them.

'You got the CD, then?'

'Yes,' Anna nodded, resting her arms on John's shoulders. 'And the teddy, and everything else. The CD was the greatest gift I have ever received.'

'In that case, you must have had some lousy birthdays,' John remarked as his arms found Anna's waist. He was taken aback as Anna pressed her lips to his, completely taking his breath away as she deepened the kiss, it was if everything else had evaporated, it was just the two of them. Anna pulled away, her eyes still closed as John looked down at her.

'You are the most wonderful man I have ever met.' Anna's voice was barely a whisper as she spoke, John unable to avert his gaze from her, she was keeping him completely transfixed. How someone so perfect could say things like that about him, he wasn't sure. 'I didn't think someone like you existed, until I found you and now everything in my life makes sense. The CD was perfect, thank you so much for doing that for me.'

'It was my pleasure,' John breathed before meeting Anna's gaze once more. 'Happy birthday.'

'Come on you two.' Both John and Anna looked to the doorway to see Mary standing there, hands on her hips. 'We are about to start up a game of don't forget the lyrics. Boys versus girls, and considering the boys we have here tonight they are going need all the help they can get, John.'

* * *

'I'm so sorry lads, I was sure it was 'made of, not later.' Michael, Edith's boyfriend apologised as he made his way back to his team. 'Did you know it, John?'

'I did as it happens, yes,' John nodded as Michael sat beside him. 'Take That are one of my staples, however you flung yourself towards that bell like a gazelle, I wasn't going to stand in your way.'

Mary's 'don't stop the lyrics' quiz had bought out the competitive streaks in both the girls and the boys. John was joined by Robert, Tom Branson and Michael on the boys team, the girls were made up of Sybil, Edith, Cora and the birthday girl, Anna. Mary stood by the fireplace in the living room, a table beside her. On the table were score charts either side of a bell. The idea was as Mary played a song, she would stop it and the teams had to say, or sing for an extra bonus point, the lyric that came next. If a team member knew, they had to race the other team to the bell to give their answer. With rock being John's specialist subject and also with him not being afraid to sing in public, the boys stormed into an early lead. The girls came back into the contest with the next round being 90's pop, Anna and Edith showing their questionable music tastes by knowing the words to songs by artists from B*Witched to Steps. By the final round, the scores were locked at ten all, A Million Love Songs by Take That was the tie breaker song. As soon as the music had finished, Michael left his seat to claim, as he thought, the glory for the boys. However, he got the lyric wrong, Sybil swooping in to garner victory for the girls.

John looked on as the girls celebrated, watching Anna as she embraced each of her team members. Despite it being an insignificant game, she looked completely and utterly overjoyed. She began to search for his gaze, his heart swelling with love as she found it. Although he couldn't do anything but smile back at her, nodding in her direction to acknowledge her teams victory, familiar doubts began to creep back into his conscious. He blamed Vera. It was she who had made him feel like this, petrified of committing his whole life to another person, afraid to let go and follow his heart. Anna really was breathtaking, far too good for the likes of him and sooner than later, she would realise that. Maybe he should cut and run now.

'Okay, if you would all like to make your way to the kitchen, we'll do the cake.'

John was shaken out of his thoughts by yet another order from Mary the hostess, a steady stream of guests passing him by into the kitchen until it was just him and Anna.

'Penny for them,' Anna smiled, grasping John's hand in hers.

'Oh my darling, my thoughts aren't worth that much.' John replied, squeezing Anna's hand in his. 'However, I do have something I need to speak to you about. Later, I'll walk you home.'

Anna stepped closer before standing on her tiptoes, her mouth beside John's ear. 'I was hoping you'd come in and spend the night as well.'

John chuckled lightly at her words, before placing a hand on Anna's stomach. All at once, it dawned on him this could be the last time Anna let him touch her in such a way, especially after he told her of his plans to rent his own place. He cleared his throat, then gasped as he felt the baby move beneath his fingertips, the sensation never failing to amaze him.

'John, are you okay?'

'Yes.'

'Anna, we've lit the candles.' Mary appeared in the doorway between the kitchen and the living room, interrupting the moment between John and Anna.

'On my way,' Anna sighed, letting go of John's hand and moving towards the kitchen. She looked over her shoulder at John. 'This isn't over, Bates. '

'With you involved, Miss Smith, I don't doubt that.'

* * *

Sitting in her living room, Anna upstairs having a shower, John waited patiently for her return, unsure of how he was going to tell her he wouldn't be moving in. They hadn't spoken about it much, only when John announced it to her initially and her responding by saying they would speak about it nearer the time. John knew she would want him to move in with her, however. Everyone around him was right, it made sense. Yes, with no baby they wouldn't even be contemplating living together, yet without the baby they also wouldn't be together right now. But those doubts, they just wouldn't go away.

'Bloody hell, I never knew heaven until I used that honey and mango bubble bath you gave me this morning.' John jumped as Anna joined him in the living room, sitting at the opposite end of the sofa before lifting her legs to rest on his lap. 'You were lost in your thoughts again, weren't you?'

'I'm a deep thinker,' John shrugged, resting his hands on Anna's ankles.

'So, what is this time? Cars? Football? Music? Or have we branched out and started thinking about which Pussycat Doll would make the better date?'

'Haha,' John tickled one of Anna's feet, causing her to giggle.

'Stop,' Anna begged, reaching for John's arm. He did as he was told, meeting her eyes with his own. 'What did you want to speak about?'

'Ahh, that.'

'Yes, that,' Anna replied, raising a sceptical eyebrow as John gently pushed her legs away, sitting forward. 'What is it?'

John breathed in deeply before turning his head to look at Anna. 'It's about Robert and Cora. And when they leave.'

'Yes, good on them I say.'

'Indeed, but as you are probably aware it shall leave me homeless.'

'Yes,' Anna agreed. 'Unless you can afford to buy their house. How much does a wedding singer make?'

'Not enough to afford their house I'm afraid.'

'Well, you'll just move in here won't you?' Anna suggested, moving her legs back up on the sofa so they were behind John. With his reply not forthcoming. Anna attempted to meet his gaze, although he was staring straight ahead. 'John?'

'I viewed a flat this morning.' John answered tentatively before looking at Anna. 'A flat of my own.'

'But why...' Anna's voice was weak, she sitting up beside him. 'Don't you love me enough to move in, is that it?'

'God no, I have never loved anyone like this, Anna. It's me, I have the problem. We have a unique situation, me and you. Despite knowing each other well, we are still in the early stages of our relationship. If it wasn't for the baby, I don't think you would be asking me to move in with you. Not yet, anyway.'

'If it wasn't for the baby, we would have never met again, John.'

Standing up, John paced over to the window, hands in his pockets. 'I know that.'

'Then why won't you move in with me?'

Lifting his gaze to look at the ceiling, John sighed before looking back at Anna. She was hugging her knees, suddenly seeming so small to John. He really hated himself, especially knowing he had made Anna feel like this. She deserved so much better than him, although he couldn't leave her without a glimmer of hope. Treading the floor towards her, John fell to his knees before taking her hands in his.

'I'll think about it, I really will.'

'That's very noble of you.' Anna's tone was sarcastic as she pulled her hands away, before sitting back against the sofa.

'This is difficult for me, Anna.' John tried to explain, still down on his knees. 'My divorce damaged me in ways that still affect the way I think.'

'But I'm not your ex wife. I am me. A completely different person. The last thing I want to do is hurt you.'

'You feel that way now, but...'John didn't finish his sentence, instead choosing to rise to his feet. 'I'll go now, I don't think I should stay tonight. I'll call you tomorrow.'

Anna didn't respond, staring at the wall beyond John before he left the room.

* * *

Walking into her bedroom an hour or so later, Anna picked up her mobile phone which she had left charging on her dresser. She saw John had sent her a text message. Disconnecting her phone from the adapter, she sat on the edge of her bed as she began to read.

_'I am not worthy of you. You deserve a man who can give you his whole self, not someone who is so scared of dedicating himself to another woman he'd rather be alone. Please find it within yourself to allow us to go back to the original arrangement, I want to support you in the raising of our child, even if we can't do that side by side. I am so sorry, John x '_

Her hands trembling, Anna dropped her phone to the floor before letting her tears engulf her. What had she done that was so wrong, to make John so scared of committing himself to her? Why had he found it within himself to ruin everything? She looked at the bedside table, the little card with the flowers sat there. Taking it within her grasp, she tore it in a rage before falling back against the bed, burying her head in the pillow, muffling her broken sobs.

One thing was for sure, at that very moment, the way she felt, Anna not seeing John Bates ever again would be too soon.

* * *

**A/N 2- As my favourite Christmas advert sings, holidays are coming... **


	9. December

**A/N- Will John come to his senses?**

**Disclaimer- same as chapters April to November...**

* * *

Mary walked into the kitchen, almost recoiling in disgust as she saw John at the table, reading the paper and eating a slice of toast. He turned to see her, standing immediately as she brushed passed him, hardly acknowledging his presence. John watched as Mary set about boiling the kettle, as if he wasn't there at all.

It had been this way ever since Anna and John had parted company that night. John had kept his distance, Mary had been their go between despite ignoring the majority of John's questions. She had spent a lot of time with Anna. She was devastated. The thought of becoming a mother did little to quell the despair she was feeling at John ending their relationship, for what seemed no rational reason.

'Did you see her then?' John asked, hoping Mary might respond to him this time. She remained silent for a while before turning to meet his gaze, the sudden eye contact startling John a little. 'Please. Say something, Mary. Anything. Just let me know how she is.'

'You're a cretin.'

'Okay, insults are better than nothing I suppose.' John sat down again, resting his head in his hands. 'I feel terrible.'

'Good,' Mary replied without missing a beat, turning to regard John with a harsh stare, her tone firm. 'She just doesn't understand why you ended things and I must say I agree with her. She is two weeks from giving birth to your child. Her mind should be filled with thoughts of holding her newborn child in her arms, finally becoming a mummy. But they are full of you.' Mary turned back to the counter, the kettle now boiled. 'God knows why.'

'She's too good for me.'

'I dare say you are right, John. But for some reason she believes you are the love of her life. She told me she's never felt this way before.'

'Neither have I...'

'Doesn't that tell you something then?' Mary cut John off before sitting opposite him at the table, setting her tea down before her. 'You need to talk to her. She was listening to Taylor Swift when I called in on her earlier. It's getting desperate.'

'You know how she feels. She wants nothing more to do with me.'

'No, it's not that at all. She misses you. She wants you to be involved, every step of the way. But not just as the baby's Dad, but with her properly. It would be too painful any other way. Which could be deemed unfair to some, yet given the circumstances, perhaps not. '

John inhaled deeply as he considered his response. 'What I went through. With Vera. It's...'

'Shaken my confidence, made me unwilling to commit, yada, yada, yada.' Mary rolled her eyes before taking a sip of her drink. 'John, Anna is not Vera. When are you going to realise that?'

'I already do. Anna at her worst is ten times better than Vera at her best. ' He shifted uncomfortably, suddenly feeling awkward at discussing such things with his best friends daughter. 'And I want to be a Dad to my child. A proper Dad. Perhaps when Anna has calmed down.'

'For goodness sake, get a grip man. You could deny your feelings, let your insecurities get the better of you and live an unhappy life, or you could admit what you know deep down. You know you and Anna belong together, that what you have is built to last and that you want to raise your baby together, side by side.'

'Haven't you left yet, John?' John turned to look over his shoulder at Robert, standing in the kitchen doorway. 'The traffic in London will be murder if you leave it any longer.'

'Where are you going?' Mary asked, narrowing her gaze on John.

'To stay with my Mam for a few days,' John replied before swigging the rest of his tea in one gulp. 'And Robert is right, I want to arrive before the rush hour.'

'Your baby is about to be born and you're swanning off down to London?'

'Relax Mary, I'll be bringing Mam back for Christmas. She's using Sybil's old room. I just need some time away from everything, to get my head sorted.'

'Well, I have the solution to that,' Mary began, watching as John rose to his feet. 'Go around to Anna's, tell her you are an idiot and that you want to be with her.'

John stared at Mary for a moment, clenching his jaw before turning to look at Robert. 'I'll text you when I arrive down there. See you in a few days.'

'Cretin,' Mary yelled after John as he disappeared down the corridor.

'Mary,' Robert scolded, closing the kitchen door. 'That's a bit harsh.'

'Am I wrong though?' Mary asked, gesturing with her hands to emphasise her point.

Robert shook his head. 'No. And I have faith he'll come to his senses. His mother will see to that.'

* * *

Knocking on the door of Sybil's old room, John waited to hear for permission to enter. Getting impatient, looking up at the ceiling he went to knock again before the door swung open. Stepping across the threshold, he saw that Iris had already made herself at home. Her stuff was all unpacked, she had even laid out a couple of pictures on the dressing table, one of John when he was a child and one of the two of them when John had arrived back from one his deployments in the army. He studied the pictures from across the room as he closed the door behind him.

'I don't know why you take those with you everywhere,' John remarked, turning his attentions to his mother who was knitting in the chair placed beside the bed. It was a small white cardigan, obviously intended as a gift for the baby.

'Me either,' Iris replied, the coldness to her tone taking John aback a little.

'Oh, come on mam. You're not still upset with me?'

'For breaking that poor girls heart? Yes I am.' Iris didn't look up from her knitting, her stare harsh as she straightened out the half completed cardigan on her needle. 'Cora was telling me about it whilst you and Robert went to get the car.'

They had just returned from an evening out at a restaurant. Iris had insisted she pay when they went to dinner with Robert and Cora as a thank you for letting her stay with them over Christmas. John and Robert sat back and listened as she and Cora planned Christmas dinner down to the finest detail, the two of them had always got on like a house on fire, even though they had only met a handful of times.

'It was the due date yesterday, wasn't it? The twenty second?' Iris continued, looking over her glasses at John.

'She's got my number if she needs it,' John shrugged, walking back to the door. 'Look, I didn't come in here for an argument. I came to make sure you were okay and to tell you I am going to bed. Cora and Robert are watching a weeks worth of this antique programme they recorded and I'd rather not. So, goodnight mam.'

'Hmmm,' Iris replied, her focus fully on her task at hand, rather than her son. John rolled his eyes and left the room.

As she heard the door click, then John enter his own room, an idea played over in Iris's head. It was important to her that although John had seemingly abandoned Anna, she wouldn't do the same thing. With the knowledge Robert was downstairs, Iris carefully lay down her knitting, picked up her bag from the dresser and made her way downstairs.

* * *

'Thank you for this, Robert.' Iris said as they pulled up outside Anna's house. 'I just had to see her while I was down here.'

'It's no bother, Iris.' Robert replied as he pulled the handbrake on. 'I'll stay here whilst you go in.'

Iris nodded in acknowledgement before getting out of the car. Walking the path towards the house, she checked in her bag that she had what she needed before reaching the door and ringing the doorbell. When she had been before she had noticed, but once again she observed how nice the house was, certainly big enough for a man and woman to bring a child up in. Silently cursing her son for the hundredth time that day, her attention was caught by the door opening. She smiled as she saw Anna appear, certainly looking well despite the fact she could give birth at any moment.

'Mrs Bates,' Anna said in surprise, looking beyond her to see if John was also present. 'This is unexpected.'

'Anna my love, how are you?' Iris replied in her Irish brogue. 'I hope you don't mind me popping round, John doesn't know I'm here you see.'

'Oh right,' Anna said weakly, stepping aside. 'Come on in. I'll make us some tea.'

It was uncomfortable as the two women exchanged small talk as Anna made them a drink. They spoke about how the pregnancy had gone, how Anna had felt no twinges despite the baby being due and if she thought it was a boy or a girl. Iris mentioned John had been born two weeks late, her words met with silence from Anna as she joined his mum at the table, placing a cup of tea down on the table in front of her.

'He's an eejit, I've told him that,' Iris explained, wrapping her hands around the steaming hot mug. 'Vera was a mistake, I knew it from the moment I met her. But you, you're different and he needs to realise that too.'

'I know I'm not being fair, Iris,' Anna began, staring down at the table. 'Saying it's me and the baby or nothing at all, but it would just be too painful to see him with the baby knowing he's not with me.'

'Oh, you do what you want, lass,' Iris replied, Anna telling in her tone she was fully supportive of her decision. 'His made his bed, and he can lie in it.'

Iris looked up as she heard a small sob escape Anna, she blinking furiously to try and resist the tears that had already begun to fall. 'I just love him so much, and I know he loves me too. It's so frustrating to know the only thing that is keeping us apart doesn't really exist. He thinks I am eventually going to realise I can do better than him, when the reality is there is no better man than him. Not to me, anyway.'

Iris stood up and moved to the chair beside Anna, resting her hand on top of hers. 'My dear, sweet girl. I know my son, and I know he loves you. This is the only trait he inherited from his father, stubborn to a fault. But thank goodness it is the only one. I know he will come to his senses eventually.'

'I don't think he will,' Anna couldn't hold back her emotions anymore, breaking down. Iris rose to her feet and placed an arm around Anna's shoulders. They stayed this way for a few minutes, Anna surprised to find some sort of solace in the arms of the woman who knew John better than anybody.

'How are you spending your Christmas, Anna? It's Christmas Eve tomorrow, you shouldn't be on your own. Especially in your condition.'

'Oh, I'm not alone,' Anna answered weakly, watching as Iris moved back to her original seat. 'Mary has just popped out, she'll be back in a minute and she is staying with me tonight, then mum and dad are picking me up tomorrow so I shall spend Christmas with them. I was expecting to be in hospital over Christmas you see. The midwife is coming around to see me tomorrow as well, if things don't kick off tonight.'

'So you're well supported?' Iris asked before taking a sip of her tea.

'Yes, Mary is being great and I was always staying with Mum and Dad if I hadn't given birth before Christmas.'

'Good,' Iris smiled before looking down at her bag beside her. She picked it up, placed it on the table before pulling out an envelope. 'I know your feelings towards John and his involvement with the baby, but I hope I can still help in some small way.'

'Oh, I know I'll let John see the baby in the end, be a father to it, it's just the hurt talking at the moment. I'm going to need all the help I can get once he or she is here.'

'Even so,' Iris continued, pushing the envelope across the table to Anna. 'Now you are going to accept this and I won't take no for an answer.'

Anna took the envelope and looked inside to see a cheque. When she read the amount, she was absolutely flabbergasted. 'Twenty thousand pounds?'

'Aye. I have been putting money aside ever since John married Vera, for when they had children. It never happened but I kept on saving, in the hope one day I may get a grandchild.' Iris explained before chuckling. 'Now, twenty grand later it's finally happening.'

'I don't know what to say.'

'Say you'll take the money. Use it the way I intended it to be used, to give that little one the best start in life. They are a Bates, and never let it be side Iris Bates doesn't look after her own.'

'Thank you.' Anna smiled, placing the cheque back in the envelope. 'I shall.'

* * *

Walking down the stairs, John was startled to feel his phone vibrating in his pocket. Looking at his phone, he was even more shocked to see a message from Anna. His heart beating hard and fast in his chest, he took the phone from his pocket and began to read the message.

_Hi John, just to let you know there is still no change but the midwife checked me over and everything is fine. She says they won't do anything until I am at least a week overdue so we may be in for a long wait. I am at Mum and Dad's, and Dad will call you if anything happens. Enjoy your Christmas, I just wish I could be spending it with you x _

John closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. He wanted that more than anything as well, to be holding Anna in his arms as they waited for their baby to arrive. Yet the thought of having his heart broken was still hanging over him, like a black cloud he couldn't escape, always following him. Reaching the living room, he saw his Mum in the armchair, the white cardigan now nearly completed. For a moment, he wondered how anything small enough to fit in that cardigan could possibly exist.

'That's beautiful, Mam,' John remarked, sitting on the sofa. 'Where are Robert and Cora?'

'Gone out with Mary and Edith,' Iris replied, holding the cardigan in front of her and inspecting it.

'I've just had a text from Anna. Nothing's changed,' John informed his mother, she still busy with her knitting and not looking at him.

'Is she alright?' Iris asked, reaching down beside her for her sewing box. When John took a little while to reply, Iris looked over to see him pinching the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger. Her sigh was audible as she placed her sewing box on the coffee table, before moving to sit beside John on the sofa. 'You are a silly beggar.'

'Thanks Mam.'

'I mean it. Why are you doing this? Punishing yourself in this way?'

'I'm just being realistic...'

'You are being an eejit,' Iris interrupted, John meeting her gaze with an incredulous look. 'Sorry Johnny, but you are.'

'I just love her so much, Mam.' John's voice was choked, a solitary tear falling down his cheek as he spoke. 'And I couldn't stand it, I won't be able to stand it, when she realises she is worthy of someone better than me.'

'Honestly, you young people these days,' Iris said with a laugh as she took John's hand in her own. 'I went to see Anna last night.'

'What?'

'Yeah, I gave her the grandchild fund. The fund which I was sure up until nine months ago was going to be left to you to be wasted on a sports car or some new suits to wear whilst making that ridiculous living of yours.' John laughed at his mother's remark, meeting her gaze before she continued. 'She was crying on my shoulder, much like you are now. And do you know what she told me?'

'No.'

'You are breaking her heart, John. She wishes you would realise that she isn't going to break yours. She said she couldn't fall in love with a better man when in her eyes, a better man doesn't exist.'

'She said that?'

'Yes,' Iris said, nodding her head. 'She is nothing like Vera, John. She loves you for a start, pure and simple. You need her in your life, as much as she needs you.'

Running his hands down the top of his legs towards his knees and back again, John exhaled deeply before standing up abruptly. 'I have to see her. Now. Tell her I'm sorry.'

'That's my boy,' Iris said in encouragement, standing up as John walked towards the door. 'Go and get her. And if she is generous enough to accept your apology, don't ever let her go again.'

Looking over his shoulder, John smirked, Iris doing the same. 'Thanks Mam.'

* * *

Walking to her window, wanting to let a little air into her bedroom, Anna was surprised to see it was snowing. Watching as the fall slowly became heavier, something caught her attention. A figure appeared at the garden gate. As it came nearer, the person soon became unmistakable. A look of bewilderment on her face, Anna watched as he moved to stand in the middle of the front lawn. He had seen her watching, soon his voice became audible through the open window. John was singing.

'I've been meaning to tell you, I've got this feeling that won't subside...'

Anna opened the window more, hardly believing the scene that was unfolding before her. Was John really serenading her on the front lawn at her mother and father's house?

'Now I've got you in my sights, with these... hungry eyes.'

'John, what the hell are you doing?' Anna called to him, John immediately stopping at the sound of her voice.

'You don't like this song, I have more.' John cleared his throat before beginning to sing once more, his arms outstretched. 'I sit and wait, does an angel contemplate my fate...'

'John, stop singing. You'll wake up Mum and Dad. Who do you think you are, Pierce Brosnan? Why are you here? ' Anna's tone was impatient, as was her demeanour, folding her arms against her body.

'Because I love you.' John replied before his brow became furrowed. 'What do you mean do I think I'm Pierce Brosnan? What has James Bond got to do with me serenading you?'

'In Mamma Mia. He sang to Meryl Streep.' Anna cocked her head. 'Badly, I admit.'

'Yeah, I always thought they should have chosen actors who can actually sing,' John agreed, looking at the grass with his hands on his hips, carefully considering Anna's remark. 'Like Ewan McGregor.'

'Ooh, Ewan McGregor, he's lovely...' Anna began to reply before shaking her head. 'Hang on a minute, what are we doing? You never answered when I asked you why you were here.'

'I did, I said I love you. I want to be with you. I need to be.'

'Yeah, right,' Anna chuckled cynically. 'Sure it's not just because you want to be involved with the baby?'

She winced at her words as soon as they left her mouth, John clearly shaken by the insensitivity to them. His reaction to her remark was not at all what Anna was expecting. He treaded the lawn so he was now standing directly under the window, the falling snow dusting his shoulders and his hair. Even from her position, she could see a look in John's eye, something she had never seen before. A steely determination, like he wouldn't be denied, a sureness he had never possessed in their previous encounters.

'You know something? I truly believe it is because of the baby,' John agreed, nodding his head. 'But not because the only way I will be a part of it's life is if we get back together, but because some higher power made this happen. To make me realise you are the love of my life. I was lost until we had that brief encounter, too much of a fool to recognise I should have taken the time to get to know you properly from the start. The baby happened because we were meant to meet again. You have always believed in us, I need to start doing the same. And I am sure that if you forgive me, that will be it then. We will be set for life. You, me and our perfect baby. Please Anna, I'm so, so sorry. I will spend the rest of my life making this up to you.'

As soon as he had stopped speaking, John was sure he saw the flicker of a smile play upon Anna's lips. His happiness soon turned to alarm as Anna's features darkened, she clutching her stomach before seemingly crying out in pain. She felt her legs suddenly becoming wet, looking down at the puddle that had accumulated by her feet.

'Anna?' John questioned, looking up at her with concern etched all over his face.

'Oh John, I think it's started.'

* * *

Events had proceeded quickly once John and Anna had left for the hospital. Anna's parents followed behind, collecting Mary on the way. Anna requested they be in the waiting room as she gave birth. They had only been at the hospital for forty five minutes before Anna was moved to a delivery suite. John was by her side, like she wanted, leaving her occasionally to give those gathered in support of Anna updates. Truth was, she had been feeling twinges all day, however she hadn't even told the midwife, not wanting to be a nuisance.

'Now Anna, I think we are just about ready to bring your baby into the world,' the doctor announced, the midwife agreeing with a nod.

'Dad, if you support Mum at the top of her body, we'll support the baby as it makes it's arrival.'

'Alright, here we go Anna,' John said, gripping on tightly to Anna's hands as she rested her head on his shoulder.

'It hurts, John,' Anna whimpered, digging her face into his neck.

'I know sweetheart and if I could do something about that I would in a heartbeat, just focus on what we will have at the end of all this.'

'Anna, we need you to push now, as hard as you can,' the doctor explained. 'After three. One, two, three.'

Letting out an almighty cry as she did so, Anna pushed with all the energy she could muster. John supported her with words of encouragement, telling her he had never felt prouder of her, how she had made him the happiest man on the planet. Anna murmured that she couldn't do it, she was tired but John wouldn't let give in.

'Anna, one more push and this will all be over.' The doctor looked up the bed at Anna. 'The head is delivered now. Just one more push.'

'Oh God,' Anna groaned, pressing her head even more firmly against John's shoulder. 'I can't.'

'Yes you can, Anna. You are amazing, you can do anything.' John kissed her temple. 'You can do it.'

'You are doing brilliantly, Anna.' The doctor said, his words encouraging. 'Once again, after the count of three I want you to give us a big push, I promise this is the last one. One, two, three.'

Tightly gripping John's hand in hers, Anna's cry was louder and more strained than the ones previously yet it was soon overtaken by that of an unfamiliar sound, a new noise that was destined to become a big part of John and Anna's lives for the next few months. Their baby had arrived, and was showing his mum and dad early on there was nothing wrong with its lungs.

'Congratulations Anna,' the doctor exclaimed as the midwife took the baby from him, 'you have a baby girl.'

'A girl, John we have a daughter.'

'We do,' John agreed, meeting Anna's lips in a kiss.

'Would Dad like to cut the chord?' The midwife held some scissors out in the direction of John, who gratefully took them. Cutting the chord, he stood aside as the midwife wrapped the baby in a blanket. 'And shall we let Mum have the first cuddle?'

'I think it's only right,' John agreed, moving back to stand beside Anna as the midwife walked down the other side of the bed. Anna held her hands out to receive the baby in her arms, John watching intently as she made her first contact with the baby she had been carrying for nine months.

'She is a fine baby, Anna,' the doctor remarked, 'and by the strength of her cry just now you are in for a few sleepless nights. Well done.' With those words, the doctor left the room.

'And it's just gone midnight, so your baby's birthday is Christmas Day.' The midwife said as she filled in a checklist. 'Congratulations. I'll give you both a minute then if you don't mind I'll take the little one to clean her up.'

'She's perfect, Anna,' John whispered as the midwife followed the doctor out of the room.

'I can't believe she's here,' Anna replied, stroking the baby's nose with her little finger. 'Hello you. We've been looking forward to meeting you.'

John reached out his index finger, a sensation he couldn't describe rushing through him as she wrapped her tiny little fist around it. 'Wow, this is just incredible.'

Silence reigned then, both John and Anna unable to avert their eyes from the little bundle in Anna's arms. She had stopped crying now, content to look up at her mother's face, still clutching on to her father's finger with a tight grip.

'Have you decided on a name?' John said softly, looking at Anna. 'From the top three list we made?'

'I like Jemima,' Anna answered with conviction. 'And we decided on Holly for a middle name, because it's Christmas. Jemima Holly Bates.'

'Then that shall be her name. Jemima. It's beautiful.'

Just then, the midwife came back into the room. 'Dad, you've got three very anxious people out there. I think you should go and have a chat with them whilst I look over Mum and the baby here.'

'Right,' John replied, looking down at Anna. 'Are you alright if I go out and tell them?'

'Please do,' Anna said as the midwife took Jemima from her grasp. Anna looked back at John once Jemima was safely in the midwife's arms. 'I love you.'

'Oh God, Anna,' John gasped in relief more than anything, leaning down to kiss her on the lips. 'I love you too.'

With a smirk, he looked over at Jemima being cleaned up before leaving the room. As soon as he came into view. Mary stood up. 'Well?'

'We have a daughter.' John announced, unable to keep the grin from his face.

'Oh great, I owe Dad a tenner,' Mary moaned, John grimacing at her remark. 'I mean, congratulations.'

'Could you ring my mother, Mary. She's waiting to hear at your Mum and Dad's house.'

'Sure thing,' Mary said dismissively, looking beyond John at the doors to the delivery suite.

'How is Anna?' Linda, her mother asked. 'We heard her screaming from out here.'

'She's fine, just held Jemima in her arms.'

'Jemima?' Linda said weakly, a small smile playing on her lips as she took hold of Anna's Dad, Trevor's arm. 'What a wonderful name.'

'Yeah,' John agreed, nodding his head. 'Isn't it?'

'Oh Trevor, go and call Darren. Tell him he's an uncle.'

'Yes dear,' Trevor huffed before holding his hand out to John. 'Congratulations John.'

'Thank you Trevor,' John took his hand and shook it.

'Look, I think we should all go then come back later.' Mary suggested, Trevor stopping in his tracks. 'I'm sure Anna will want to get some sleep and you both need time to do that bonding thing. We can all come back in the morning.'

'You're right,' Linda agreed.

'Yes, I usually am.' Mary replied with no hint of sarcasm. 'We'll see you later John. And don't go running off, she needs you now more than ever.'

'Don't worry, Mary,' John said, turning to walk back towards the delivery suite. 'I've stopped being an idiot. I am going nowhere.'

* * *

With Anna sleeping gently behind him, John looked out of the window, Jemima in his arms as he watched the children in the park next to the hospital playing with the new toys that had got for Christmas. He had never felt as complete as he did now, as he held his daughter. She seemed content to be rocked in his arms, looking up at him as he whispered to her.

'Well, this is a day I never thought would arrive, young Jemima, to hold my child in my arms. And you're more perfect than I had ever imagined. Daddy's baby girl. I don't know what I did to deserve you, or your mummy, but God knows I am going to do everything in my power to protect you both, your happiness is the only thing that matters to me now.'

'That was beautiful.' John looked over his shoulder at Anna, she yawning as he did so. 'Is she alright?'

'Yeah, she was just whimpering a bit so Daddy is giving her a cuddle. She's falling asleep now.'

'You're a natural.'

'Oh, I don't know about that,' John replied, looking back at Jemima's tiny face. 'All I know is I've never known a love like this before.' He lifted his head to meet Anna's gaze once more. 'For either of you.'

'John, what you said last night...'

'Good morning, good morning.'

Their moment was interrupted by Anna's parents bursting into the room, followed by Mary carrying a handful of pink balloons attached to ribbons.

'Hello,' Anna said excitedly, happy to see everyone albeit frustrated her conversation with John had been interrupted. Linda lent down to embrace her daughter, followed by Trevor.

'We are so proud of you, sweetheart,' Linda cooed.

'Thanks mum,' Anna smiled before looking at Mary approaching her. 'Hi Mary.'

'I knew you could do it, kid,' Mary grinned, taking Anna in her arms. 'Another little shopping buddy.'

'Indeed,' Anna chuckled, looking over as John passed Jemima over to an eager Linda.

'Oh my, Anna. She's gorgeous.' Linda exclaimed. 'She's got your eyes, and your nose.' Just then, Linda began to sniff before wincing. 'But oh dear God, she smells like your grandfather.'

'Thanks a lot,' Trevor groaned.

'Shall we change you, little one?' Linda asked in her best baby voice.

John thought this might be his opportunity to go home, he had been dying to see his mother and tell her all about Jemima. As Mary and Trevor positioned the balloons around the room, Linda busy changing Jemima, John approached Anna.

'I'm going to pop home now everyone else is here, and tell Mam about Jemima.' John whispered, leaning down to speak to Anna. 'I'll be back this afternoon.'

'Alright,' Anna said reluctantly, nodding her head. 'Don't be long.'

'I'll be back before you know it.' As he gently stroked her face, he smiled before moving towards the door.

* * *

Robert, Cora and Edith had gone for a Christmas morning walk, giving John and his mother some time alone. Iris listened intently as John described Jemima to the tiniest detail. How she had beautiful blue eyes, how tiny she was.

'I'm so pleased for ye, John,' Iris said, tapping his forearm. 'Really I am.'

'And I'm pleased for you,' John replied, placing a hand over the top of his mothers. 'Nana.'

'Aye, at last,' Iris chuckled before her face took on a more serious expression. 'How did it go last night? Did you tell Anna?'

John sighed before sitting back against the back of the sofa. 'I told her I was sorry and wanted to make it up to her, she smiled at me then in the next instance went into labour. We haven't discussed it properly, but we kissed just after Jemima was born, and told each other we loved each other. We were about to broach the subject then Anna's parents and Mary came into the room.' His lips upturned into yet another smile. 'Lets just say I think we can work it out.'

'I'm glad.' John watched as Iris stood up, walking over to the Christmas tree. 'Now I opened the scarf and gloves you bought me earlier. With Robert and Cora.'

'Yeah, sorry about that. I'm not good at buying presents.'

'Shut up will ye, I loved them.' Iris dismissed her sons concerns, returning to him clutching onto a gift bag. 'This is for you.'

John took the bag and pulled out a thick navy blue sweater. 'Oh Mum, the annual woolly jumper.'

'When was the last time you had a cold?' Iris asked, waiting for an answer but John had no response. 'Exactly. Besides, that's not all.'

John watched as Iris reached into the pocket on her cardigan, revealing a small red box. John looked confused as he took the red box his mother was offering. Opening it, he almost gasped at what was revealed to him. A ring, an emerald set in the middle of two diamonds. John looked at his mother, unsure as to why she was giving it to him.

'Mam, what's this?'

'It was your Granny's, she gave it to me when she died to give to you, to use as an engagement ring.'

'Mam?' John's voice was quizzical as he examined the ring he held in his grasp. 'Why didn't you give it to me when I married Vera?'

'Simple. I didn't like Vera. I like Anna.'

'You think I should propose to Anna?' John gasped, meeting his mothers eyes as she nodded.

'Yes, I do.'

'Oh Mam, I don't know...'

'Come on, Johnny. Take a risk.' Iris interrupted her son. 'Even you have to admit you haven't taken things slowly since the day you met Anna. That isn't necessarily a bad thing. Can you see yourself with anyone else now?'

'No, I don't want anyone else.'

'And you have Jemima to consider now. She deserves a stable home life. A secure family unit.'

'I've never thought of asking Anna to marry me though, Mam.' John shrugged, closing the box. 'Marriage has never been on the cards.'

'Well, how does it make you feel?' With Anna as your wife.'

He stopped to think for a moment, to think of Anna walking down the aisle, promising their lives to each other. Then he thought of spending every day with her, watching Jemima grow up side by side. Perhaps in a few years creating a little brother or sister for their first born. John was surprised. He didn't feel scared, or anxious. These thoughts felt right, a life with Anna was right and he was ecstatic to have finally realised with her was where his heart lay.

'It feels natural,' John murmured. 'I can't believe I didn't feel it until now.'

'Well, babies make you feel differently about a whole manner of things,' Iris replied wisely, tapping John on the shoulder. 'Now get down that hospital. Who knows, that ring could be the best Christmas present you have ever been given.'

'Well it's certainly better than yet another jumper,' John replied, tongue in cheek as he stood up.

'Get moving, John Bates. You're never too old for a smack.'

* * *

The blood thundering in his ears, John walked onto the maternity ward, a gentle nod to the receptionist who instantly recognised him as one of the new father's created earlier on in her shift.

'Merry Christmas,' she said politely.

'It certainly is,' John replied with a wide grin. 'The best I would say.'

He continued on, passing the entrance to the general ward before stopping outside Anna's private room. Anna had been put in there temporarily as the ward was busy, yet John had asked as he left earlier if he could pay for Anna to stay there. Anything to keep her comfortable and settled. Looking through the small pane of glass in the door, John was certain he had never seen a more beautiful sight than the one that filled his vision right now.

Everyone had left. Anna was rocking Jemima in her arms, John could see she was speaking to her, intermittently placing gentle kisses on her head. The baby's head was covered in dark hair, obviously his contribution, yet her eyes were a piercing blue, much like her mothers. She was more perfect than John could have envisaged. Then there was Anna. True, she looked exhausted but John had never seen her looking so happy, so at peace. It took his breath away, to see these two perfect creatures before him and know he was part of making this happen. It almost made him reluctant to interrupt, yet he could hold on no longer. Opening the door, Anna's head immediately snapped towards John as he entered the room. John was relieved as a smile spread across her face.

'Hello you,' Anna said softly, watching as John moved to sit on the edge of the bed. 'Thank you for the room.'

'It was my pleasure,' John whispered, squeezing Anna's wrist. 'How is she?'

'Absolutely fine. She's had her feed, and you've just missed another dirty nappy.'

'Great timing,' John replied, raising his eyebrows before stroking the top of Jemima's head with his index finger.

'Yeah, don't get used to it,' Anna chuckled, John looking up to meet her gaze. 'I've already decided you are on night time duties.'

'Have you now?'

His tone was teasing as their eyes met, John struggling to catch his breath until Jemima struggling a little in her mothers arms drew both her parents attentions. Anna's motherly instinct kicked in, gently hushing Jemima whilst rocking her softly once more.

'You know, what you said last night,' Anna began then nodded towards Jemima. 'Before all this. Did you mean it?'

John sat with a straight back, hissing out a breath before responding to Anna's question. 'I was hoping you would bring that up.'

Anna was a transfixed spectator as John stood up before slowly bending down to rest on one knee. Once in position, he pulled out a small red box, before revealing his mother's beautiful ring.

'John, what the hell are you doing?' Anna almost squealed as she placed a now sleeping Jemima in her cot beside the bed.

'I'm dancing a polka,' John replied sarcastically, a smile immediately spreading across his face. 'What do you think I'm doing?'

'I'm sorry,' Anna moved so her legs were hanging over the edge of the bed before placing her feet on the floor beside John. 'This is just so out of the blue.'

'Believe me, it is for me too. Mum gave me the ring this morning, it was my grandmother's you see. She said it could be the best Christmas present I have ever been given,' John looked at Jemima sleeping soundly in her cot. 'Present company excepted of course.'

'Look, don't feel you have to do this. Even though you hurt me when you left me that night, you were right. In the real world, this is new...'

'No Anna, I am not doing this because of Jemima. I meant what I said earlier, that I love you. I am doing this because I want you to be my wife.'

John's voice broke as he spoke, not expecting to feel such strong emotions as the ones he was feeling now. He didn't anticipate wanting to be Anna's husband so much, until his mother had put the idea in his head. Now it wasn't even wanting the idea to become a reality, he needed it to.

'I knew I loved you, you know, that first morning when I left your room and was greeted with your lifesize Robbie Williams cut out.' Anna laughed, in turn causing John to join her. 'And I was certain I had to have you when I heard your karaoke.'

'Hey, I wasn't that bad,' Anna gently kicked the outside of John's thigh, he then softly taking hold of her ankle before the atmosphere turned decidedly more serious.

'And just then, as I watched you cradling our daughter in your arms, I now know I can say without any doubt, that I cannot live without you.'

With those words, Anna lost any remaining resolve she may have had and let a tear fall down her cheek, looking down at John and realising she had never felt as in love before as she did with John in this moment. Taking hold of her hand with one hand, he moved the ring closer to her with the other.

'Anna, will you marry me?'

After John's beautiful proposal, Anna couldn't respond with words, not straight away anyway. Raising a hand to her mouth, she was now openly sobbing as she looked at the ring in the box. After a few moments she nodded, before managing to choke out a few words. 'Yes, of course.'

'You will?' John was crying himself now as he rose to his feet, taking the ring out of the box. Slipping it onto Anna's finger, he was relieved to find it was a perfect fit. 'I love you, Anna.'

'I love you too, so much.'

As she remained seated, John knelt down before her once more, wrapping Anna up in his arms. All at once, he felt complete. This was what true happiness felt like. A new baby daughter, a beautiful fiancée and the promise of living out his days with the two of the them by his side.

Wise men say only fools rush in, but in this case, John didn't mind being deemed a fool. In fact, he delighted in that fact.

* * *

**A/N 2- I hope you enjoyed this fluff fest. There shall be an epilogue to follow. I like epilogues.**

**All the best for Downton tonight, lets hope Bates doesn't do anything stupid :**)


	10. April Fools Day

**A/N- You may be pleased to know this is the first of three part epilogue. Set on the April Fools Day following their baby's birth, John and Anna get married. You may also like to know, it starts with smut moving the rating up to M with a bump. **

**Just a little note- the bit between John and Trevor during the ceremony actually happened at my cousins wedding. His father in law's wife didn't speak to his father in law all day afterwards. **

**Disclaimer- Same as chapters April to December. **

_**April Fools Day**_

Coming down from her high, Anna fought hard to regulate her breathing as John continued his ministrations on her body. Her thighs, stomach, breasts. His hands were everywhere, seemingly all at once, her body on fire with each single touch. Moving up so he was hovering above her, his knees either side of hers, John rested his forehead on Anna's.

'How was that for you, Miss Smith?' John asked, brushing his lips against hers before turning his attention to her neck.

'Well Mr Bates,' Anna replied, tangling her fingers in the hair on the back of John's head. 'Let's just say I'm glad you're becoming my husband tomorrow, and that I can look forward to activities like this with you for a very long time indeed.'

'Twice now, is it?' John continued, placing his palm on her breast as Anna pushed her head back into the pillow, her eyes squeezing shut at the contact.

'You've spoilt me,' Anna answered, moving her legs so they were now outside John's. 'Perhaps it's time I returned the favour?'

Moving a hand between them, Anna placed her hand around his rigid length, squeezing gently, delighting in the groan she elicited from her fiancé. John's hips began to move of their own accord as Anna moved her hand up and down.

'Enough,' John gasped, placing his hand on top of Anna's and stilling her movements. 'I need to be inside you.'

As she released her grip on him, John moved his hand to Anna's knee, lifting her leg and aligning himself with her almost in one movement. Looking into Anna's face, their gaze locked as he gently breached her folds, pushing himself into her welcoming warmth. As they become one, mutual groans of appreciation filling the air, a noise from downstairs caught both their attentions.

'Anna, I've returned with your daughter.'

'Sugar, it's Mary.' Anna hissed as John rested his forehead on the pillow she was also resting her head on. The urge to rock his hips was becoming too difficult to ignore.

'Come on, I can be done in a tick.' John moved his lips back to Anna's neck, nuzzling the skin there before he began to feel Anna resist him.

'John, Mary has called out for me and our daughter is downstairs. We can't.'

'Well, it's not the first time since she's been born that Jemima has interrupted us at a vital moment, I suppose. I can forgive her, she is only three months old but Mary.'

'Mary did take Jemima out as a favour, so we could do some important last minute wedding stuff,' Anna pointed out, running an index finger along John's cheek. 'This doesn't really qualify as that, does it?'

'I don't know,' John replied, raising his eyebrows, causing stirrings in the pit of Anna's stomach, which had been slowly waning to reignite. 'This is my last day as an unmarried man. I thought we were just making the most of it. Besides, I was actually willing to do some things towards the wedding. You instigated this.'

'What was I supposed to do? The way you were opening your mouth when eating that apple...'

'I was eating, Anna. How else am I am suppose to eat without opening my mouth?'

'Anna, are you up there? Where's John?'

'Coming,' Anna yelled in response, John wincing as the full force of Anna's voice hit his ear drum.

'Hmm, that's not the first time I've heard that word escaping your lips this afternoon.'

Anna didn't dignify his remark with a response as she gently nudged John off her. Getting out of bed, she knew she had John's full attention as she searched for her dressing gown, finding it at the bottom of her wardrobe.

'So you're leaving me here in limbo? You've twice taken your pleasure without paying me back and that's it? Hardly fair is it?'

Tying up her robe, Anna knelt on the bed and met John's lips with her own in a lingering kiss. 'I'll make it up to you tomorrow night. Our first night alone together in months.'

'I'll hold you to that,' John replied, smirking. 'I suppose I better get ready to go around to Robert's. Save him and Cora from the whirlwind that is my mother.'

'No, you stay here until I can get rid of Mary. She'll rib me if she finds out what we've been up to.'

'Get rid of her, how? Isn't she staying with you tonight?'

'I'll send her out to get a takeaway for dinner or something.' Anna said dismissively, standing back up.

'Anna, it's half past three.'

'Oh, I'll think of something. Stay here until I call you.'

John lay back in bed, watching Anna as she left the room. Making sure her robe was tied securely, Anna walked down the stairs. Soon she could hear the sound of Mary cooing over Jemima. Anna smiled as they came into her line of vision, Jemima sitting in Mary's arms transfixed as she chatted to her about the best place to shop if you like a bargain.

'Now, for me you can't go wrong with Next, but if payday is still that bit away and you need some retail therapy then there is no shame in visiting Primark.' Mary looked over her shoulder as Anna approached. 'Oh look, Jemima. Your mother is alive, and rather under dressed.'

'Yeah, I was about to jump in the bath when you came in.'

'Right,' Mary said sceptically, Jemima's eyes darting around, attempting to find where the direction of her mother's voice was coming from. Anna walked towards them, Jemima instantly giving her mother a gummy smile when she came into view. She was becoming a bonny little thing. Dark curls covered her head, obviously taking after her father yet her sparkling blue eyes mirrored her mother.

'It's so sweet she's starting to recognise you,' Mary remarked, passing Jemima over to her mother. 'And her smile is to die for. It's hard to believe John had a hand in creating something so cute. Where is John?'

'Erm, he had to pop out. A problem with the balloons.' Anna answered, rocking Jemima in her arms before kissing her on the forehead.

'Oh right, so that's why he's standing in the doorway looking rather hot and bothered. And dishevelled.' Anna looked over her shoulder, shooting a glare in John's direction before Mary continued, placing a hand on her forehead, her tone despairing. 'And he's wearing shoes. Oh God, you aren't going out looking like that are you?'

'I'm staying at your Dad's tonight, aren't I?' John pointed out, moving his gaze from Mary and focussing all his attentions on Jemima. 'Hello baby girl. Did you have a nice time with Aunty Mary?'

'Hang on a minute, you both weren't doing what I think you were, were you?' Anna flashed a shade of crimson as John smirked, his tongue firmly in his cheek. That was all the answer Mary needed. 'I can't believe it. You ask me to take your daughter out on the pretence you can sort stuff out for your wedding tomorrow, when all the while you wanted time alone to live in sin a little longer. Disgusting.'

'We did the wedding stuff,' Anna argued, handing a wriggling Jemima over to John who preceded to lift her above his head. 'Be careful John, remember what happened that morning last week when you wore the contents of her bottle to the meeting with the registrar.'

'But found you had some spare time?' Mary rolled her eyes.

'He started it,' Anna whined, pointing at John.

'I was eating an apple.' John said in his defence.

'Seductively,' Anna bit back.

'Seductively?' John furrowed his brow. 'How can you eat an apple seductively?'

'Please,' Mary rose her hand, indicating she would like them to stop talking. 'I don't want to hear about what counts as foreplay around here.'

'Look, with Jemima we've barely had time to even look at each other, let alone do what we just did.' John replied, meeting Anna's gaze. 'We aren't even having a honeymoon. Which we are fine about, Jemima will always come first. But would you begrudge us just one hour of alone time together?'

'Oh, I suppose not.,' Mary said with a sigh, moving to the kettle and switching it on. Her voice turned slightly jovial. 'An hour eh? That's impressive.'

'Yeah, and get this,' John replied, mimicking Mary's mocking tone. 'In that hour, I didn't even...'

'Stop.' Anna interrupted, placing a hand over John's mouth. 'Mary doesn't need the details. Are you going to Robert's now?'

'Yeah, but I'd like a moment alone with you and Jemima first.' John said, looking over at Mary who was looking at him with an appalled expression. 'If that's okay with Miss Prude over there.'

'I am not a prude,' Mary said rather too enthusiastically, folding her arms in front of her body. Silence fell across the room then as Mary waited for one of the two adults standing opposite her to back up her claim. Realising no such remark was forthcoming, she snatched her bag from the back of Jemima's pushchair. 'Oh, for goodness sake. I am going to buy us a bottle of wine for tonight. Your mum likes Merlot, yes?'

'Not red,' Anna said as Mary walked past them .'I'm drunk on just one glass of red.'

'Fine, not red. Goodbye John, see you tomorrow when I hope you'll be looking slightly more presentable than you do now.'

With those words, Mary continued on her way before John handed Jemima to Anna then followed Mary down the corridor. 'Mary, wait.'

'What is it, John?' Mary asked, opening the door before turning back to face him.

'Look, we've always had this teasing relationship. Even when I first met you, as a cocky teenager, me and you could fire off the banter like no tomorrow.'

'When I used to call you Master Bates?' Mary remembered with a smirk, John reciprocating and shaking his head. 'And you called me Contrary Mary. I'd never admit this to you in other circumstances, but I used to have a crush on you.'

'On me?' John's grin was broad as he shifted awkwardly on his feet. 'That's hard to believe.'

'Tell me about it,' Mary rolled her eyes, then looked John up and down.

'Yeah, yeah,' John took a step back before casting his gaze downwards. 'What happened to that strapping young soldier you met back in the day.'

'He impregnated my best friend on a one night stand,' Mary replied without missing a beat. 'And within a year has made her the happiest woman on the planet, and in turn made me happy too.'

'Really?'

'Yes. I mean, don't get me wrong, you're an idiot.'

'Thanks,' John said sarcastically.

'But you are such a remarkable man. It's easy to forget you saved my father's life.' John bowed his head as Mary reminded him of a time in his life that seemed so long ago, he barely believed it had happened to him, 'but I have never really had the chance to say thank you for that. So thank you.'

'I'd do it all again in a heartbeat,' John replied, his voice breaking slightly as old emotions came to the fore. 'He had so much back home to live for. I, had nothing really. It's only now, at the grand old age of...'

'Sixty two,' Mary butted in with a giggle, John pushing her gently on the shoulder.

'Forty six, thank you very much,' John began to laugh, Mary doing the same before their gaze meeting resulted in them both falling silent. 'Thanks for everything. I mean it. I really believe you played a big part in making this all happen. I am marrying the love of my life tomorrow. How many people can say that?'

'Alright, rub it in.' Mary sighed, stepping out over the threshold. 'But it's my pleasure. Just treat her right, or you'll face my wrath. See you tomorrow.'

'See you tomorrow,' John answered, watching as Mary walked down the garden path.

Closing the door, he walked back to the kitchen to see Anna pointing at things outside the kitchen window to Jemima. He would never get enough of watching Anna and Jemima together. His girls. He'd often stand and stare at them, Anna completely unaware he was there. Since John had moved in in the new year, time had sped past at an alarming velocity. It was decided they would marry quickly after his Christmas Day proposal, setting the date for April 1st, Jemima's conception date. Still, the day had arrived and Jemima was now thirteen weeks old. Anna was a natural mother, John never had any doubt she would be. John himself wasn't prepared for how much fatherhood would change him. He would lose his own life before Jemima, or indeed Anna came to any harm and it was an overwhelming feeling. Yet, it was a welcoming one. Something to finally live for. His daughter, and Anna.

'You both never fail to take my breath away,' John announced his arrival, walking into the kitchen to stand beside Anna. 'I love you both so much.'

'And we love you too.' Anna replied, resting her head on John's shoulder as he wrapped his around her waist. 'I can't wait to have the same surname as you both tomorrow. I've felt like quite the outsider.'

John wriggled his index finger into Jemima's palm, she instantly taking hold and gently squeezing it. 'Well, you should know me and Jemima only let the most special people share our surname.'

'Do I qualify?' Anna asked, looking up at John as he lifted his gaze from his daughter to his soon to be wife.

'And then some,' he whispered, meeting Anna's lips in a gentle kiss. Pulling away, he kissed Anna's temple before carefully placing a soft kiss on Jemima's head. 'I best get going. The next time I'll see you will be when you are walking down the aisle.'

John and Anna had decided to hire a hotel for their nuptials, especially since the majority of John's relatives would be attending from Ireland and would need a place to stay. Getting married in a church wasn't them, this felt right. All three venues, the room for the wedding, the hall for the reception and the honeymoon suite were all under the same roof.

'I'll look forward to it, Mr Bates.'

With another quick kiss shared between them, John reluctantly backed away and picked up his overnight bag which he had left by the kitchen door. 'And don't forget. You owe me. Twice.'

* * *

John and his best man, Robert along with Cora and Iris arrived at the hotel early on the morning of the wedding to book themselves in and to be there in for any early arrivals in the form of wedding guests. John's mother took matters into her own hands, hell bent on making sure everything went well for her son's big day. She insisted on helping the boys get ready, making sure their looked smart in their three piece, navy blue pinstriped suits, even tying their accompanying yellow ties. Cora was put in charge of making sure everyone who needed one had a room booked and that the rooms were decorated to the specifications of the Bride. John didn't have a look in when it came to that sort of thing, and he was glad of it. His only instruction was to wear a yellow tie, the suit was up to him.

Sharing a moment with her son as Robert went down to join Cora and greet some guests, Iris told John she was so relieved he was finally happy, and despite all his bravery in his days in the army, she had never been prouder than she was when she saw him cradling little Jemima in his arms.

Once in the room where he and Anna would become man and wife, John was met by a chorus of cheers from his gang of Irish cousins and old friends from school. After being almost manhandled in a bundle of overexcited Irishmen, Iris stepped in and told them not to mess up John's freshly combed hair. Robert couldn't help but laugh as ten or more heavyset men immediately let John go at the mere sound of Iris's voice.

John was pleased to see so many familiar faces under one roof, all united to share his and Anna's day. William and Daisy were there, Daisy now blooming in her fourth month of pregnancy. Gwen and Evelyn were also present, Gwen now sporting a diamond on her ring finger. Sybil was there with Tom, they taking a break from their travelling to be at the wedding. Edith was also present, although newly single.

Reaching the top of the aisle, John made small talk with the registrar as he waited for Anna to make her appearance, before Anna's brother Darren caught his eye. Robert was happily chatting to one of the guests on John's side about a rugby tour to Dublin in his teens, as John and Darren discussed the benefits of driving a Diesel car over an Unleaded one.

Or at least that was what John thought they were talking about. He kept gazing at the door, willing for it to open and for Anna to be standing on the other side. Suddenly, the doors swung open and in walked Linda, followed by Mary carrying the apple of John's eye. She was wearing a frilly yellow dress, John now suddenly understanding why Anna requested he wore a yellow tie. He had asked not to see Jemima's dress until the day, and it had been worth the wait, John committed the sight of his daughter to memory as she approached. Her bright blue eyes were trained in on him, her black curls covered with a small headband, atop was a yellow flower. For a moment, John struggled to believe this perfect creature was his daughter.

'Hello ladies,' John smiled brightly, kissing Linda on the cheek, then Mary. Jemima recognised John, becoming visibly excited at the sight of him. 'Hello baby girl, can Daddy have a cuddle?'

'Be careful she's not sick on ye, Johnny,' John heard his mother calling from beside Cora in the front row.

'Linda, I'd like you and Mam to sit together in the front row,' John requested, gesturing towards the empty seats beside his mother, Mary sitting beside Cora. 'To look after Jemima together whilst me and Anna do our thing, so to speak.'

'Of course,' Linda smiled, Iris looking at the scene with a smile on her face aswell. Kissing Jemima once more, he handed her over to Linda and she walked to sit beside

Iris.

'Okay, John and Robert, if you could take your positions please.'

As the registrar sounded her instructions, John and Robert stepped towards the table she was standing behind. As Edith pressed play on the music system at the back, John smiled as the opening bars of 'Can't Help Falling In Love' began to fill the room. In the next instance, Edith opened the doors to reveal a very proud Trevor, Anna clutching onto his arm. She was beaming, and John released a breath as they took their first step into the room. He was sure he was dreaming as Anna moved towards him, just when he thought she couldn't get any more beautiful, she surprised him yet again.

Once by his side, John leant down to whisper in Anna's ear.

'No words I could say now would be adequate, or sum up how you look today, so I'll just simply say wow.'

'You don't look too bad yourself, Mr Bates.'

As the ceremony passed, it was full of laughter, moments of contemplation but most importantly, love. Laughter came when Trevor stepped forward to declare he gave Anna's hand in marriage. The registrar asked he and John to shake hands, Trevor deciding to pull his hand away at the last minute and stroke his hair before completing his task properly.

'Welcome to the family, son,' he whispered, shaking his hand.

As John and Anna exchanged their vows, Jemima decided at that moment to coo rather loudly, obviously recognising her parents voices. Laughter filled the room as her baby voice became harder and harder to ignore. John didn't hesitate to accept when the registrar suggest Jemima join them as they were declared husband and wife.

Holding Jemima in his right arm, John wrapped his other around Anna's waist as he pulled her close to him for a kiss to cement the vow they had made to each other.

Once dinner was served and the formalities of the speeches out of the way, the party really began. John insisted he start proceedings by dedicating a song to Anna, deciding on the song which had moved her to tears on the way to William and Daisy's wedding, _I'd Love To Be Your Last_. Telling the story of the song afterwards, John invited William on stage to recreate their rendition of I Gotta Feeling before he and Anna kicked off the dancing with their first dance. It couldn't really be any song other than _Hungry Eyes. _

As the evening grew older, Iris and Linda on Nanny duty took Jemima upstairs with an hour or so of the party still to go. Linda reappeared to wave her daughter and new son in law off, or rather up to the honeymoon suite with the promise their little bundle was in safe hands. She and Iris were in neighbouring suites, and had agreed to take care of their granddaughter whilst her parents had an undisturbed evening. Saying goodbye and thanking the gathered guests as the sound of _Angels_ reverberated around the room, Anna and John were soon ready to spend their first night together as man and wife.

Their love making has been languid and slow, both tired after the days festivities yet wanting to consummate the promises they had made to each other earlier in the day. As John cried out, his movements slowly coming to a stop, his breathing haggard, he lightly brushed his lips against Anna's.

'Well, I do believe I have paid you back for the two times you were there for me yesterday, Mr Bates.'

'Yes, I believe you have, Mrs Bates,' John replied with a whisper, kissing her forehead as he slowly came back down to earth. 'That was incredible, making love to you for the first time as my wife.'

'It really was,' Anna agreed as John moved to lie beside her, instantly wrapping her up in his arms. 'I love you.'

'I love you, too.'

And with whispers of the future and the excitement it would hold, John and Anna fell into a contented sleep.


End file.
